


Maybe It's Not So Bad After All...

by PageofD



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Body Dysphoria, Carlos is not described, Cecil Is Not Described, Cecil is kinda creepy at first, Existential Angst, M/M, Menstruation, Panic Attacks, Trans Character, all Carloses are trans Carloses, like once, mentions of animal death, so not really a big thing but warning just in case
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-26
Updated: 2016-10-08
Packaged: 2018-08-11 06:07:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 42,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7879495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PageofD/pseuds/PageofD
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Night Vale was as much an escape for Carlos as it was an opportunity of great scientific value. He’d get to study all the outright bizarre stories and phenomenon he’d heard about, right from the supposed source of them, but he’d also get away from all the people who told him he was wrong, a scientific improbability, a disgrace to his field of study. And that wasn’t even including the people who just didn’t care enough to change the name they called him.</p><p>--</p><p>aka the Trans Carlos au that ran away<br/>(from me)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Day One

**Author's Note:**

> So for the most part this is a trans Carlos AU. Most things will be following the events of canon (more or less) but the order has been switched up a little, at least with the events of 'Pilot'. I'm gonna try and not describe Cecil and Carlos too much, I'll let you have your own pictures of them.
> 
> A heads-up that this chapter does feature a shower scene in which Carlos """deals""" with his dysphoria. It's not described in detail, more of a dancing-around-it, but if something like that could trigger you then please, be safe with it.

Night Vale was as much an escape for Carlos as it was an opportunity of great scientific value. He’d get to study all the outright bizarre stories and phenomenon he’d heard about, right from the supposed source of them, but he’d also get away from all the people who told him he was wrong, a scientific improbability, a disgrace to his field of study. And that wasn’t even including the people who just didn’t care enough to change the name they called him.

Night Vale was a new beginning for Carlos, and he took great care with his responsibility over it. He hand-picked only the most accepting scientists for his team and ignored all the homophobic and transphobic applicants who just wanted their names on what would surely be groundbreaking papers about the small desert town. Carlos ended up with a team of four, Dave, Rochelle, Nilanjana and Stan, and after a week of final preparations and equipment orders they set out for Night Vale.

Carlos was the first to arrive in Night Vale, having driven more or less straight through the last two nights of travel, eager to reach the town and start setting their lab space up. The others had opted to stay in a motel each night, and Carlos had joined them at first, using the time for team bonding and talking about what each of them wanted to do when they reached Night Vale. The third and fourth nights of driving Carlos had pushed on instead, only pulling off the road to nap in his car when he physically couldn’t keep driving.

The fifth day was the day Carlos reached Night Vale. The town had appeared out of nowhere on the horizon around 11:30 and by 1pm Carlos was driving down the main road, blinking blearily at the pedestrians staring at him. He knew he looked a mess, the first thing on his to-do list was to find the lab building and shower, but he couldn’t quite work out whether that warranted everyone staring at him or if there was something else going on. He shifted uncomfortably in his seat, tugging the seat belt away from his body and letting it snap back into place before he reached out and turned up the volume on the stereo, still playing the mixed 80s CD Dave had left behind. 

Carlos tried to ignore all the stares as he continued down the road, nodding his head in time to the beat and taking the opportunity to check his directions while stopped at a red light.

After adjusting to the fact the instructions were written in terms of landmarks, rather than street names, Carlos found his way to the lab space relatively easily. The only real confusion came from the Escher-like geography that allowed him to take five consecutive right turns while ending up on a different street each time. 

Carlos pulled into the lab’s driveway, taking a moment to dig a notebook out of the backseat clutter and make a note to investigate the street geography, and climbed out of his car, stretching out in every way possible and grimacing at the dry desert heat. Carlos locked his car and looked down the street, trying to find the place with ‘the bright neon sign, you’ll know it when you see it, promise’ that his directions said would have the lab keys. 

The lab itself was a grey three-story affair, with tall windows on the front of every level and four huge ventilation ducts on the back of the roof. To one side of the building was the driveway, now with Carlos’ car parked in it, and an empty lot, with shapes in the dry grass indicating where walls and doors and lives used to be. Across the road were some low-rise apartment buildings, the kind that had five or six apartments spread across three floors, each one painted a different bright colour. There was a hot pink one, with flowers growing on each of the little balconies; a green one, with laundry hanging out on the top floor and someone staring at Carlos from the second floor; and a light blue one, where the bottom floor still had christmas decorations draped over the railings while the other floors looked empty and deserted. On the other side of the lab, sharing the sidewall of the building to halfway up the second floor, was a pizza place, Big Rico’s written on its sign in large letters that were probably brightly-lit neon at night.

Carlos gave his shoulders a long, slow roll, regretting his inability to shower before interacting with people, and waved at the person staring at him before he turned and walked up to the doors of Big Rico’s. The sign claimed the store was ‘Open and municipally mandated!!’ with a picture of a smiling pizza slice giving the reader a thumbs up, and it swung slightly from side to side as Carlos pushed the door open and stepped inside to the sound of a jingling bell.

Carlos shuffled in slowly, not wanting to bump into anyone or anything while his eyes adjusted to the new dimness of the indoors. He could hear people’s conversations slowly come to a halt as he walked in and he froze, feeling the prickle of many pairs of eyes coming to focus on him. As his eyes adjusted, Carlos saw the people staring at him, some with a piece of pizza in their hands, forgotten, others with mouths half-open, staring at him with wide-eyes, and even others, half-squinting with their heads tilted, like he was a puzzle that needed to be solved.

Carlos looked around them all, taking in the people of this small town and, after taking a deep breath and squaring his shoulders, ignored them all and walked over to the service counter. He’s glad there’s no line in front of it, it meant he could walk right to the front and speak to the attendant immediately.

“Excuse me,” Carlos started before pausing to clear his throat and pitch his voice down slightly. “I’m renting the lab next door? I was told the keys would be here.”

The attendant nodded slowly, staring at Carlos’ hair, even while turning away, their eyes remaining on what Carlos was sure was a sweaty, matted mess.

“Rico! The lab guy’s here!” The attendant called into the kitchen, starting the slow turn back to face Carlos, their movement slow enough to make the scientist shift uncomfortably. “He’ll be right with you.” The attendant said, smiling dreamily while they waited.

It couldn’t have been more than five minutes of standing and waiting, but with each creeping minute of silence and staring from the attendant Carlos became more and more aware of his sweat-soaked body and matted hair and the bags no doubt residing under his eyes. He really was a mess and he mentally kicked himself for driving through the nights instead of stopping somewhere and showering.

“You the guy here ‘bout the lab?” Carlos was jerked out of his thoughts by a new voice, deep and echoing through the store.

“Uh, yes? I’m Carlos, I’m renting the lab next door?” Carlos’ voice pitched up in his uncertainty, looking up at the intimidating form of, presumably, Big Rico.

“Nice to meetcha, I’m Big Rico, but you can just call me Rico.” Rico offered a big grin and a broad palm that swallowed Carlos’ hand when he shook it. Rico gave an appreciative nod at Carlos’ firm handshake before crouching down to rummage through the cupboards under the counter, searching for something. Carlos fought the urge to rise up on his toes to get a look at what Rico was doing, settling for rocking back on his heels and tucking his hands into his pockets instead. 

Rico straightened with a groan, clutching a set of keys in one hand and a stapled sheaf of paper in his other. “Here’s your keys, and here’s all the information about utilities, security sigils, bloodstone chants and your holiday insurance.” Rico said, passing the documents and keys over to a mildly bewildered Carlos.

“S-security sigils? Bloodstone chants?” Carlos stammered, eyes skimming the front piece of paper.

“Ah, don’t worry about it, I’m sure you’ll know all about that.” Rico laughed, reaching over the counter to slap a hand on Carlos’ shoulder. “And if you lot ever need anything,  _ anything _ , just let me know. See ya around!” Rico waved and headed back to the kitchen, leaving Carlos with more questions than answers as he left the pizzeria and returned to his lab.

Carlos let out a small groan as he stepped from the cool interior of Big Rico’s and back into the heat of the outside, not wasting any time in his path to his car, briefly, to get his duffel from the trunk, and then to the lab’s front door. It only took a little fumbling from Carlos to find the right key and get the door open, and he was tripping across the threshold before he could blink.

From his position, sprawled on the floor with his duffle off to the side somewhere, Carlos could really admire the lab space. The back wall consisted of what looked like an industrial cold room next to four fume cupboards, all painted a garish mint green. In the corner a narrow set of stairs was tucked away between a small cupboard and the first of three offices lining the Big-Rico’s side-wall. The other wall was lined with cupboards all the way down, occasional sinks and gas taps coated in a thick layer of dust along the countertop. The ceiling was open in the middle, giving glimpses of a sectioned second floor and the water-stained ceiling above it.

Making a mental note to check for leaks in the bathrooms above, Carlos pushed himself off the dusty floor, abandoning his duffle temporarily as he walked around his lab space. “My lab space!” He said aloud, unable to believe it and letting out a breathless laugh that echoed around the room.

Carlos investigated each of the offices, finding them all dusty and stocked with a bench and cupboards as well as a sink and gas tap. One of them had shelves fixed to the wall and he grinned, mentally claiming it for himself already, even going so far as to write his name in the dust on the bench.

Carlos left his office and looked around again, already picturing how the lab would look filled with humming equipment and bustling scientists. Another grin settled over his face as he walked over to the door, pushing it shut and picking his duffel and the papers he’d dropped off the ground.

Slinging his bag over his shoulder and briefly flicking through the papers, Carlos started heading towards the stairs in the corner. He stopped skimming through the papers long enough to climb the stairs and take a look at the second floor. The majority of this floor was cubicles, just walled-off areas where a desk and chair would fit nicely, maybe a microscope too. They wouldn’t be hard to dismantle, but it would be worthwhile to keep a few of them, Carlos thought. 

Carlos didn’t spare much time on the second floor, instead heading for the third floor, where the living spaces were. He already knew there were three rooms, one with an ensuite and one communal bathroom for the other two. They’d already talked room arrangements over as a team and it was agreed that Carlos would get the ensuite room, as the team leader, and that Rochelle and Nilanjana would share one room while Dave and Stan shared the other. 

The stairs came up into a hallway that opened into a communal kitchen/living room, with the oven and stove in one front corner and an old couch sitting atop an ancient rug in the middle of the floor. Next to the kitchen was the first bedroom, which was outfitted with basic dorm furniture, with a door to the shared bathroom in the back of the room. The bathroom was wedged between the bedrooms, the only entry points being through either one of the bedrooms. Carlos passed through the bathroom to look into the other bedroom quickly, more checking that it had the right number of beds than any real concern about the room, and then headed through the living room to his own room, tucked into the front corner across the building from the kitchen.

Carlos’ room was dim when he stepped into it, the curtains closed over the windows that took up the most part of the outer walls, and dropped his duffel onto his bed, kicking up a cloud of dust that made him cough. He waved the dust from his face, giving a few big coughs to clear his airways before he unzipped his duffel and started searching for his towel and some clean clothes. Having found what he was looking for, Carlos nudged the bathroom door open with his foot and dropped his bundle of fabrics on the cold tiles. 

A quick scan of the bathroom showed a basic sink, toilet and shower, as well as a mirrored cabinet mounted above the sink and a towel rack opposite the shower door. A quick fumble against the wall later and the fluorescent light on the roof flickered on with a low hum, casting Carlos’ usually warm tones in a sickly greenish light as he peered in the mirror, making him look worse than he actually did. Carlos quickly turned his back on the mirror, shutting the door and pressing in the lock in the handle, even though he logically knew there was no reason to. 

Carlos stripped efficiently, tugging off his dirt-stained lab coat and throwing it aside before he toed off his shoes and threw his socks after the coat. He paused for a moment, searching for a fan switch on the wall and then, when he couldn’t find one, turning to the covered over window and prying it open an inch, just enough to let the steam out as he showered. Ventilation sorted, Carlos started the shower, giving the hot water time to arrive from wherever the water heater was hidden in the lab. While the water pattered against the shower floor, Carlos slid his glasses off and sat them beside the sink so he could tug his plaid shirt off over his head without undoing the buttons. The plaid joined the growing pile of laundry in the corner and Carlos focussed on that, the thought of buying a hamper and working out where there was a laundromat in town was, rather than the way he peeled his binder off, feeling both freer and more trapped as he tossed it aside and stretched out. Carlos could tell the water was heating up by the increased mugginess in the room and quickly kicked out of his jeans and underwear to all but dive under the stream of water, sighing at the feeling of days of grime slowly washing off his body.

Carlos gave his whole body a precursory rub down, focussing on rubbing away all the stale sweat and desert dust and not on what exactly he was rubbing. He always found something else to focus on when he showered, often it was task lists or experiment methodologies, but now he was so tired all he needed to think about was what he was washing away. 

After the first rinse off, Carlos ducked back into his room to get his small bag of toiletries, mainly his shower gel and 2-in-1 shampoo and conditioner, and set about giving himself a more thorough rubdown, this time while thinking about what the first things to buy would be. They had budgeted to have money when they arrived in town to buy things like a fridge and food and  _ maybe _ a second hand washer/dryer, and they had double and triple checked the amount set aside to make sure it would go as far as they needed it too. But Carlos needed something to occupy his mind and so decided to spend his shower estimating how much, exactly, he would need to buy a vacuum cleaner, a fridge and enough sheets for everyone’s beds. 

By the time Carlos was scrubbed clean from his hair to his toes, he had a full first-day shopping list and an estimate of how much it would cost the team, as well as an intent to go out immediately and get it all, or at least as much as possible. Carlos dressed as efficiently as he undressed, drying his body brusquely and then wrapping his towel around his hair to help it dry. He pondered how long his hair was while he tugged on his boxers, they had little beakers and conical flasks on them, and decided that as soon as he had time he’d get a haircut, but for now there were more important things to be bought. Jeans followed the boxers, and then Carlos’ binder, pulled on with a small groan but leaving a smile on his face as he felt his chest smooth out into what he was comfortable with. A quick spray of deodorant and he tugged his shirt on, following it with another plaid shirt, this time unbuttoned and with the sleeves rolled up.

Carlos left his bathroom rubbing at his hair with his towel, he’d need to go back and get his glasses and brush his hair, but for now he was getting a clean pair of socks from his bag. Carlos froze as he approached his bed, a piece of paper laid out next to his duffel where there had been nothing but dust before his shower.

‘Dear Lab Resident,’ the note started, the lettering spidery and written in a deep purple ink. ‘Your presence is requested at City Hall at no later than 3pm today to hold a Town Meeting about your presence in this town and what it means for our people.’ The signature on the note was illegible, but the chances were it was from the Mayor of Night Vale.

Carlos swore and ran back to the bathroom, digging through his pile of laundry to find his jeans, and his phone, to check the time.

“1:50. Fuck.” Carlos thumped his head against the bathroom wall. “One hour to put together a full presentation.  _ Fuck _ .”

oOo

The town meeting was a success. Carlos managed to pull a vague presentation together and make it to the City Hall with a few minutes to spare to calm himself and set up. It was a little unnerving how everyone had turned to look at him as he bustled through the doors, laptop tucked under his arm and the lab coat he’d pulled on as he left the lab billowing around him, but their attentiveness helped him calm as he stood before them and spoke to them. Carlos told the people of Night Vale that they were living in what was  _ by far _ the most scientifically interesting community in the US, between the nonsensical seismological readings and the lights in the sky they’d heard rumours of, and that Carlos was sure he and his team would have plenty to study while in town. 

Carlos finished the meeting by taking questions from the audience, fielding a few about how long he and his team would be in town (two years, unless their funding was renewed), where his team was right now (still on their way to town) and what his first point of study would be (probably the seismological monitoring station on the edge of town). Carlos was in the middle of thanking the people for attending when a final hand shot up in the back of the room, a shirt cuff rolled up the arm and bearing an interestingly tattooed forearm.

“Excuse me,” The arm’s owner said in a deep baritone, standing and flushing when Carlos met his gaze. “Mr Scientist,”

“Please, just call me Carlos.” Carlos said, tucking his hands into his pockets while the asker grinned at him.

“Oh,  _ Carlos _ ,” The man sighed, almost swooning where he stood and Carlos couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow in question, wondering exactly where this was going. “Carlos, I’m Cecil, from Night Vale Community Radio. I was wondering, for the sake of my listeners, of course, what you do to get your perfect hair to look so, well,” Cecil paused, giving a low chuckle and shaking his head, “perfect?”

Carlos felt his cheeks get hot as he stood there, staring at this man,  _ Cecil, _ who had asked about his hair, his “ _ perfect” _ hair, which was no doubt actually a terrible mess from the frantic fingers Carlos had been running through it as he tried to prepare for this meeting. Carlos was frozen, stuck in Cecil’s eager gaze like a deer in a set of headlights, fighting the urge to scoff and run from the hall and this radio host who just  _ had _ to be mocking him.

“U-uhm…” Carlos said, flinching as his voice came out high and strained. “I’m sorry Mr…”

“Palmer! But please, just Cecil is fine.” Cecil jumped in, all but bouncing on his heels.

“I’m sorry  _ Mr Palmer _ ,” Carlos said slowly, forcing his voice down from his surprised squeak. “I don’t quite see the relevance of that question.” Carlos disconnected his laptop and tucked it under his arm. “Thank you all for coming today, please don’t hesitate to drop by our lab space, next to Big Rico’s, if you have any further questions.” With that Carlos gave a jerky bow towards the audience and breezed off the stage and towards the doors. Behind him Carlos could hear the sound of many conversations starting at once, as well as a single familiar baritone, slowly getting closer to him with each muttered ‘excuse me’ as he all but ran from the room.

“Mr Scientist, Carlos.” Cecil called, freeing himself from the last seat in his row and following Carlos as he left the hall, reaching out to catch the scientist’s shoulder with his fingers.

“Mr Palmer, please. I have science that needs doing.” Carlos said, shrugging off Cecil’s hand, but conceding and turning to face the radio host. “What can I help you with?” Carlos sighed upon seeing Cecil’s downcast face.

“Oh, well, I just wanted to welcome you to our lovely little town!” Cecil bounced back quickly, smiling and blushing as he spoke. “Also, well, everyone listens to my show, not to brag or anything but NVCR  _ is _ the best source of local news, and I thought it might be helpful if you had my phone number? For if there’s any vital information you need to share with the town, that is.” 

Carlos hesitated, his fingers slowly drifting towards his pocket as he weighed the pros and cons of getting the radio host’s number. “I’m not sure, Mr Palmer. Phones can be dangerous in lab situations, say if I received a message from you and I accidentally spilled some acid in my haste to read it,” Carlos paused, flushing as he realised how that sounded and rushing to clarify, “since it would, of course, be coming from a credible news source.”

“Oh, I understand.” Cecil said, eyes downcast and lips frowning. “Though…” The radio host paused, biting at his lip and seemingly having an argument with himself. “What if I didn’t  _ initiate _ conversation, only responded to you? I can promise to do that if it would make your science safer.” Cecil nodded eagerly to himself, already smiling again and looking at Carlos like a pleading child.

Carlos gave a small smile and tugged his phone from his pocket, opening a new contact page and titling it ‘NVCR’ before handing it to Cecil to put the number in. “Okay, thank you Mr Palmer, I’ll be sure only to contact you in an emergency.” He said, watching Cecil’s deft fingers fly over the number pad.

“Of course Carlos, though... if you ever happened to want to discuss _other_ things, say dinner plans, or coffee meetings, that would be more than welcome too.” Cecil gave a shy smile, cupping Carlos’ hand from below with one hand while his other pressed the scientist’s phone into his palm. “And please, I insist, call me Cecil.”

“Okay,” Carlos said with a sigh, gently disentangling his hand from Cecil’s. “Thank you Cecil. But I really should be going, I need to get the lab set up for the rest of my team.”

Carlos gave Cecil a final, slightly awkward smile, and turned to the front doors of City Hall, strolling through them as he heard Cecil calling a goodbye from behind him.

Carlos made a mental note to buy a radio amongst all his other purchases, if NVCR really was the best place for local news then he might be able to learn about all kinds of events that needed to be investigated from it.

oOo

Shopping in Night Vale was a whole new experience for Carlos, but one he managed to make it out of mostly unscathed. He’d had to abandon his labcoat in the white goods store when the salespeople turned vicious in the middle of taking down his delivery address, but he managed to sign on the line and escape with only a small scratch on his arm from when the salesman had jumped on his back. Visiting the Target was baffling, considering the bedding department was exactly perpendicular to the rest of the store, and without its own gravity to at least make browsing easier. The staff had set up a few ladders, presumably from the hardware aisles, so that customers could reach the top of the bedding, but it was hard to balance on the ladder and pick seven sets of sheets off the shelves. 

The rest of Carlos’ trip through Target was easier, though no less baffling. The toy section was contained in a 1 meter square cage, the geometry that made it possible giving him a headache when he tried to work it out, and when Carlos reached the music section, looking for something other than Dave’s 80’s music to listen to, he found it filled with radios and alarm clocks. He picked out a radio for the lab, and a smaller one for his own room, and left the area, giving up on trying to understand anything for the time being. 

“I can always come back later.” He told himself, ignoring the way his fingers were itching to take notes and walking towards the homewares section. “Tomorrow, or when the others arrive.” 

The homewares section was surprisingly the most normal part of the store, featuring mops, buckets and vacuum cleaners, though the section dedicated to bloodstone circle maintenance and ‘how to use your bloodstones to prevent ichor stains’ was new to Carlos. He took one of the books off the shelf and flipped through the pages, a lot of them featuring large blocks of text under incredibly detailed diagrams or indescribable symbols that seemed to move on the page. Carlos shrugged and threw it into his shopping cart, remembering Big Rico mentioning bloodstones and figuring it was worth researching a little. 

Carlos filled the rest of his cart with a full-sized vacuum cleaner, as well as a small hand-held one, a handful of cleaning cloths, two mops and two buckets. Nodding at his load of goods, Carlos turned himself towards the checkouts, passing shelves of cleaning products, clocks, clothes, blood ritual manuals that he stopped and blinked at, and eventually the medical section, which Carlos detoured through to pick up a well-stocked first aid kit.

At the checkouts Carlos muttered a brief greeting to the person standing at the counter and started unloading his cart onto the conveyer belt. The worker gave Carlos a crooked smile, showing blood-stained fangs as they started scanning his items. Carlos just shrugged the teeth off, already done with the town’s weirdness for the day, postponing any freakouts until the rest of his team arrived so at least they could all lose it together.

“I see you made it through the bedding department.” The worker commented, scanning the sheet sets and sliding them into a bag to be passed to Carlos.

“Yeah, is it always like that? It seems a bit inconvenient.” Carlos commented, pulling the Team debit card from his wallet to pay for his purchases.

“Nah, just every 5th Tuesday.” The cashier answered, tugging the receipt from the printer and presenting the bottom as well as a needle to Carlos. “Just a blood smear please, and you’re good to go.”

Carlos winced as he pricked his thumb with the needle and smeared it across the signature line before passing it back to the cashier and being passed his copy of the receipt. “Thank you, have a good evening.”

“You too Mr Scientist!” The cashier called as Carlos left the store.

oOo

The first things Carlos unpacked from his car were the bigger of the two radios, both vacuum cleaners and the cleaning cloths. It took him three trips, but he stacked the boxes beside the door and set about opening them all, starting with the big vacuum, which he immediately used to clear some of the dust from a patch of bench where he proceeded to set up the radio. He turned the radio on and searched the frequencies until he found something resembling music, deeming it good enough and tugging off his overshirt to tie around his waist as he started cleaning in earnest.

All the surfaces in the lab needed a good clean, most of them layered in dust as they were. The vacuum dealt with the most of the dust as Carlos moved around the room, methodically vacuuming the countertops and then the floors underneath them and opening the windows as he moved along, eager to get a breeze passing through. Carlos hummed tunelessly as he vacuumed, trying not to think about the attacks of the salesmen at the white goods store or the mind-bending geography of the Target. Those thoughts could wait, there was always a better time for breakdowns, and right now there was a lot of cleaning to be done. Carlos turned to the big, open floor and vacuumed across it, tugging more of the power cord out as he crossed the room and mentally recapped his town meeting.

For the most part Carlos was glad that people had been paying attention, though it was doubtful that the radio host, Cecil, had been listening all that much, considering his question. 

“Perfect, my hair, ha!” Carlos laughed, a little bitterly, as he pushed in to vacuum what would be his office. “Like anything I have could be considered perfect.” Carlos frowned to himself, reaching to get the very corners of his office, making a small noise of disappointment when it proved too much of a stretch for the power cord.

Carlos rolled the vacuum cleaner out of his office, leaving it in the middle of the lab floor and replacing it with the hand held vacuum to finish the job. While he was in the main room Carlos took the time to turn the radio up, noting with surprise that it had changed from the music to a news program, with Cecil’s voice talking about a dog park. Carlos let Cecil’s words fade away, just taking the sound of the host’s voice with him into the other offices as he used the handheld vacuum to clear out the last of the dust from them. 

With the last of the vacuuming done, Carlos jogged out to his car to get the mops and buckets, blinking and shielding his eyes as the late afternoon sun hit his face when he stepped outside.

“Huh,” Carlos huffed, checking his watch and looking up at the sun again. “ _ Huh _ .” Carlos dug his phone out of his pocket and looked up the sunset times. “That’s not right.” He hummed thoughtfully, frowning at the sun. He backtracked to his car, leaning close to the front window so he could read the clock on the dashboard which read a definite 7:20, matching both Carlos’ phone  _ and _ watch, and denying the sunset time of 7:15.

Carlos opened the back door of his car, rummaging through all the bits and pieces he’d packed neatly but had been shifted on the drive, and found a stopwatch that matched all his other clocks.

“The sunset’s  _ late _ .” He said to himself, squinting into the stubbornly-present sun. Carlos’ fingers twitched towards his phone, wanting to call his team and tell them about this discovery, this phenomenon he was seeing with his  _ very own eyes _ , but he remembered being told about difficulties communicating with Night Vale and he sagged. It was a much less exciting discovery without someone to share it with.

Carlos collected the mops and buckets from where he’d dropped them and trudged back into the lab, beelining to the nearest sink to fill one of the buckets with warm water. He drizzled in some dish detergent he’d had in his car, still frowning about his unshared discovery when he heard the voice on the radio talking about him. 

“Carlos told us we were  _ by far _ the most scientifically interesting community in the U.S.,” Cecil was saying, and Carlos smiled, appreciating the realisation that Cecil had, in fact, been paying more attention than Carlos thought he had been. “And that he had come to study just what was going on around here.” 

Carlos gasped, his phone in his hand and already composing a text before he’d even finished his thought.  _ He did have someone he could tell. _ Through Cecil, Carlos could tell the whole of Night Vale about anything important, Cecil himself had said so. Carlos wrote a brief text summing up the discovery and laid his phone on the bench, turning back to his slowly filling bucket with a smile. He wasn’t expecting a response, but just knowing he had told  _ someone _ filled Carlos with the renewed excitement of discovery.

Carlos turned the taps off and heaved the bucket of soapy water out of the sink, putting it on the floor and dunking one of the two mops into it. His phone buzzed on the benchtop, startling Carlos out of his preliminary experiment building thoughts. He glanced at the lit-up screen, managing to catch only the first word of the message before the screen dimmed again.

Carlos scooped his phone up and unlocked it, reading Cecil’s message quickly.

‘Carlos!!! Darling Carlos, are you sure the sunset was late??? What do you think caused it??!!’

‘Yes, Cecil, I am sure. I checked the time on at least 4 different clocks, and each of them said it was 7:20 and the sun was still up even though it was supposed to set at 7:15! As for the cause, I don’t yet know. I will have to run some experiments when the rest of my team get here and though I am already thinking of some ideas, a very important part of being a scientist, I’m sure they will have some great things to add to it.’

Carlos’ fingers flew across his phone screen as he wrote his message, eager to tell Cecil more in the hopes he would mention it on his show and thus possibly be able to get more information about it from the other townspeople.

Carlos put his phone back on the bench and started mopping the lab floor even while he started to yawn, he wanted to get the bottom floor clean so he could start setting up some proper lab equipment tomorrow. It didn’t take long for Cecil to reply again, but Carlos ignored the message in favour of finishing the mopping and emptying the bucket into the sink.

Cecil’s voice was still coming from the radio, talking now about NRA slogans, and Carlos let the sound wash over him while he looked around the freshly-cleaned lab and nodded to himself.

Satisfied with the state of the bottom floor, Carlos tucked his phone into his pocket, hooked his arm through the handles of the Target bag, which was filled with the sheets and the smaller radio, and bundled the vacuum cleaner into his arms, ready to take his cleaning to the top floors. 

Getting to the second floor was surprisingly easy for Carlos, and when he got there he placed the vacuum cleaner on the floor and trundled it along the hall to the next staircase. For the second staircase Carlos decided to leave the vacuum cleaner at the bottom, taking just the sheets and radio upstairs to start with. 

He set the radio up on the kitchen counter, tuning it to NVCR, and grinning happily when he heard Cecil talking about his sunset discovery. While he listened to Cecil talk about the sun, Carlos bustled around, setting the right number of sheet sets into the various rooms and hanging the now-empty bag on his bedroom door handle to act as a bin. Carlos paused a moment to wipe the sheen of sweat from his brow and check the message he’d received from Cecil while mopping.

‘Oh wow that does sound odd and scientific!!! I hope you and your team are able to work it out Dear Carlos!! Are you perchance available to meet and discuss this over coffee tomorrow????’ Cecil had ended his message with a handful of hearts and kissing emojis that made Carlos cringe and blush.

‘I am certain we will be able to work it out. We are scientists, after all. Working things out is what we do.’ Carlos replied, deliberately ignoring Cecil’s invitation to coffee.

Yawning again, Carlos tucked his phone back into his pocket and trudged downstairs to collect the vacuum cleaner. “I’ll just do my room tonight.” He told himself, hauling the machinery upstairs. “The others won’t need their rooms until tomorrow night at least.” Carlos nodded to himself, feeling his phone buzz in his pocket and ignoring it as he dragged the vacuum cleaner into his room, moving his duffel off the bed to vacuum up the dust that coated the mattress.

Carlos vacuumed his room quickly, yawning frequently as he went and desperately wishing for sleep even though it was barely 8pm. A soft guitar tune played on the radio as Carlos unpackaged his sheets and started making his bed, cursing softly halfway through as he realised he’d forgotten to get pillows and blankets for everyone. Luckily it was still warm enough on the top floor to be able to sleep without the need of a blanket, but it would be damn uncomfortable without a pillow.

“First thing tomorrow.” Carlos promised to the empty room, tucking his top sheet in and surveying his handiwork. He pushed the vacuum cleaner out of his room with a foot, following it to collect his small radio as he prepared for bed. The radio was set on the desk pushed into the corner of his room, and Carlos tugged his shirt off, laying it on his bed before he wriggled out of his binder and threw it to the floor, pulling his shirt back on hastily.

Cecil’s voice came back on the radio as Carlos shuffled into the bathroom to brush his teeth and wash his face before bed. He considered having another shower, to wash away the sweat of the day, but ultimately he was far too tired to deal with his dysphoria and instead he just prepared for bed quickly, looking anywhere but the mirror.

Carlos pulled a handful of clothes out of his duffle, laid it across the top of his bed, figuring it would work well enough as a pillow for the night, and settled in for the night, slowly falling asleep to the sound of Cecil’s sign off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So i don't know when the next chapter will be ready, but I'll try and be as fast as possible for you guys.  
> If you liked this, please let me know, and feel free to come chat to me on [tumblr.](http://lonelyboyinthelab.tumblr.com)


	2. Day 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Roads don’t work like that,” Carlos muttered, dragging his fingers through his hair, “how did I take five right turns? That doesn’t work! The Target…” Carlos looked at the empty shopping bag hanging from his door handle. “I went there. There is a Target in town. I must have… hallucinated? The other things? I was really tired..” Carlos swung his legs out of bed, standing on them shakily as he paced around his room. “Or… Or it’s all just part of the town.”
> 
> \--  
> Carlos' team arrives and Carlos has a breakdown  
> (Amongst other things)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a biggun  
> I apologise in advance for the length  
> but hey i got it done just under a day after i meant to have it done
> 
> Also hey thanks for everyone who commented on the last chapter, I spent ages gushing about your comments to my friends and trying to come up with intelligent-seeming responses.

The midday programming for NVCR, the screeching of a bat being woken prematurely and forced to greet the day, had just started when Carlos jerked awake, partially because of the reptilian screams from the radio and partially because of the scientist’s disturbing dreams. He fumbled for the volume dial and turned it down until the screeching was became a soft background noise to Carlos’ own internal screaming.

Carlos’ breath came in ragged pants, his chest heaving as he felt his panic building and threatening to overwhelm him at the memories of the previous day.

“Roads don’t work like that,” Carlos muttered, dragging his fingers through his hair, “how did I take _five right turns_? That doesn’t work! The Target…” Carlos looked at the empty shopping bag hanging from his door handle. “I went there. There is a Target in town. I must have… hallucinated? The other things? I was really tired..” Carlos swung his legs out of bed, standing on them shakily as he paced around his room. “Or… Or it’s all just part of the town.”

Carlos’ next breath shuddered into his lungs as he tugged at his hair, tears filling his eyes as he felt a hysterical laugh bubble up his throat. “ _What the fuck did I get myself into?_ ” Carlos fell to his knees, uncontrollable laughter forcing him into gasping breaths while tears streamed down his cheeks. “Dear God what is this town?” He sobbed, curled into himself on the carpet.

Across the room, on his bedside table, Carlos’ phone started up an insistent buzzing. The phone buzzed its way across the table, unaware of the breakdown its owner was having as it buzzed towards the edge of the table and stopped, teetering on the verge of falling. A few minutes passed with just the sound of Carlos’ wet laughter and his shuddering breaths before the phone started up again, buzzing off the edge of the bedside table and thudding onto the floor with enough force to startle Carlos into paying attention to it as it continued to buzz against the carpet.

Carlos scooped his phone off the floor, dragging the answer button across the screen and holding it to his ear. “H-hello?” Carlos’ voice shook as he spoke and he took a slow, lightly juddering, breath.

“Hey boss, how’s it goin’?” Dave asked from the phone and Carlos had never been more relieved to hear one of his team’s voices.

“Oh my God Dave this place is insane where are you guys right now I’ll come to you.” Carlos blurted, already climbing to his feet and digging out clean clothes from the haphazard pile he’d left on the floor. “If you can make it to Arby’s, or heck even that diner on the way in? What was it called? The Moonlight something or other, look either works I just gotta shower text me I’ll meet you there bye.” Carlos hung up and tossed his phone onto his bed, darting into his bathroom and throwing clothes every which way in his hurry to get ready and out of the lab.

Carlos jerked his shirt off over his head and turned the shower on, tripping out of his boxers and somehow managing to catch himself under the still-cold stream of water. The resulting yelp echoed off the tiled walls as Carlos jumped back against the glass shower wall, barely keeping himself from slipping on the shower floor and ending up under the stream again.

Eventually, when the water warmed up enough to not freeze Carlos, the scientist edged under the stream and started scrubbing at his body, leaving angry red lines over his skin as he turned the water off and started drying himself. Carlos wasted no time getting ready to meet his team, fighting against the lingering dampness of his skin to pull on his binder from the day before, swearing loudly when his hair ended up caught under the strap.

“Fucking _shit_.” Carlos growled, finally getting his top sorted and starting to pull on clean boxers and jeans. His shirt was tugged on as he left the bathroom, the sleeves immediately sticking to his arms as he searched for a pair of socks and hopped in place while he got them on.

Carlos barely remembered to grab his phone before he was running downstairs, ricocheting off the walls at the corners of the staircases in his haste to meet up with his team. As he crossed the bottom floor to the door, Carlos checked his phone for new messages, pausing mid-step at the 5 attached to the messaging icon. The app opened quickly when he tapped on it and Carlos skimmed the contacts messaging him as he scooped up his shoes and tucked the lab keys into his pocket.

One was a missed call message, one was from Cecil from last night that Carlos must have missed, as well as the fact that Cecil had changed the contact name from ‘NVCR’ to ‘Cecil Palmer~ <3<3<3’, and three were from his team, one from Dave, Nilanjana and Stan each. Carlos skimmed his team’s messages as he locked the lab, finding one telling him they’d meet at the Moonlight All-Nite Diner, one asking if they wanted him to order for him, and the last one telling him they’d ordered waffles with a side of chicken fries for him, as well as a disclaimer that that was how the menu served the waffles, there was no other choices for the sides. Carlos shrugged to himself, it was hardly the weirdest thing he’d seen so far in this town, and sent a quick reply saying he’d be there soon.

Carlos slid into his carseat, throwing his shoes into the passenger side and opening Cecil’s message while he started the ignition.

‘Working things out does sound very scientific.’ Cecil had sent, as well as ‘...Is that a ‘no’ to coffee?? Or should I pencil something in…??’

Carlos could almost hear the hope in the message and stared blankly at his phone as he tried to come up with a gentle way to say no.

‘I’m sorry Cecil, my team’s just arrived and I’ll have to show them around. Maybe another time?’ Carlos shook his head and deleted the draft. “Too gentle, I don’t want to lead him on or anything.” Carlos muttered to himself.

‘I have important Science to do, Cecil. I can’t afford to put time aside for coffee.’ Carlos bit his lip, unsure whether the message was too harsh or not. He saved the draft and dropped his phone into the cup holder with a sigh, pulling out of the lab driveway and heading in the direction he knew lead towards the Moonlight.

The radio wasn’t playing Cecil’s show, but Carlos figured it was too early in the day for him to be on air, considering the time of his show the previous day. Thankfully it wasn’t playing the screeching from earlier either, but rather some kind of silence that made it feel like someone was looking over Carlos’ shoulder, was breathing in his ear, was gently picking at the threads on his shirt. Carlos switched over to Dave’s cd and the feeling left him, giving him the space to think as he made his way to the diner.

Carlos remembered seeing the radio tower in front of him for most of the drive in and so used it as a marker to get to the diner, keeping it in sight in his rearview mirror as much as possible while zig-zagging across the Night Vale city blocks. The scientist got caught in a geographical loop briefly trying to turn off Somerset Avenue and past a walled-off area on the street corner, finding himself coming back around to the same corner no matter which way he turned at the next corner. The loop got boring quickly, there were only so many times you could stare at the large black walls and wonder what was behind them, but after his fifth trip past the walls Carlos found himself spat out onto Earl Street, several blocks further down the road and with the black walls a mere smudge in his rearview mirror.

Carlos shook himself and made a mental note to look into geographical loops, as well as the black walls, before continuing down Earl Street, towards where he could see the Moonlight All-Nite’s sign coming into view over the houses that were sprawled out to the edge of town.  Carlos pulled into the parking lot with no more issues, parking his car and picking up his phone, looking at the unsent draft sitting in his messages. The scientist chewed on his lip while he thought, sliding his phone back into the cup holder and reaching for his shoes, which had fallen off the passenger seat during the drive.

“God, why is texting so hard?” Carlos muttered to himself, pushing his shoes onto his feet and tugging the laces tight. “It shouldn’t be hard to tell him no. He’s just a guy who seems to really like your hair, just say you don’t want to meet for coffee.” Carlos lifted his feet to rest on the console to tie his laces, grumbling under his breath at himself. He pushed his glasses up to rub at the bridge of his nose before grabbing his phone, erasing the current draft and writing a new message. Carlos hit send before he could rethink his message and pressed his head to the steering wheel with a groan.

‘I’m going to be very busy with Science for a few weeks Cecil, I don’t know that I’ll have time for coffee any time soon.’

“You’re a disaster, Carlos.” Carlos said to himself, climbing out of his car and scuffing his sneakers along the ground as he made his way into the diner to meet his team.

The bell above the door rang when Carlos pushed it open and stepped inside, scanning the booths for his team and finding them tucked away in the back corner, talking and laughing with each other. He walked past the counter, the waitress behind it looking at him with a sly smile and some of the patrons sitting on the stools in front of it turning to look at him in interest.

“Hey, sorry it took me so long to get here.” Carlos said, sliding into the booth beside Dave, where a plate of waffles drenched in syrup sat, a small basket half-filled with chicken fries on the table beside it.

Around the table Carlos’ team had empty plates in front of them and half-drunk coffees cupped in their hands, or in Stan’s case, pushed aside to make room for a notepad that he was frantically scribbling in.

“Hiya, bossman.” Nilanjana said cheerily, pushing the only undrunk mug of coffee towards Carlos. The sentiment was echoed around the table while Carlos added sugar to the drink and gulped half of it down.

“How was your drive?” Carlos asked, digging into his waffles while the others shrugged at each other.

“Eh, you know,” Dave said, waving vaguely with his hand. “Lots of road, lots of dirt. We picked up the local radio station a few miles out, talking about a dog park?”

“Yeah! On the corner of Earl and Somerset!” Rochelle jumped in. Carlos swallowed and nodded.

“Must’ve been a repeat of last night’s show. I missed most of it cleaning up the lab. What else did Cecil say?” Carlos asked, taking another mouthful of waffle.

“Dogs are not allowed, people are not allowed, you may see hooded figures, do not approach the dog park, try not to think about it or the hooded figures.” Stan rattled off, finger following his scrawled notes on the subject as he spoke.

Carlos paused mid-bite, tapping the handle of his fork against his lips. “That would explain the huge black walls. Well,” Carlos shrugged and took a sip from his coffee. “I’m assuming those walls were the ‘dog park’ considering they _were_ on the corner of Earl and Somerset and….” Carlos trailed off when he noticed his whole team staring at him. “...yes?”

“You’re not… freaked out about this? This seems like some weird stuff, like weirder than science can explain.” Rochelle said carefully, glancing at Dave. “And Dave said you sounded pretty freaked out on the phone…

“Oh,” Carlos chuckled, poking at his waffles with a fork. “That, yeah, uh. So.” Carlos laid down his cutlery and pressed his hands together, trying to work out how to approach the conversation without making himself seem weak or like an unfit leader. “This morning, uhm. I may have had the _slightest_ of breakdowns? Just a little one really, probably less than five minutes I’m sure.” Carlos shifted uncomfortably as his team looked at him with various shades of concern.

“Oh, honey,” Rochelle started, her brows furrowed. “We don’t blame you, you’ve been here for days already. If everything’s like what we heard on the radio today then that’s totally understandable.” The others all nodded and made vaguely sympathetic and slightly condescending noises in Carlos’ direction.

“Yeah, it’s…” Carlos shook his head with a low laugh, “well it sure is something here.” He picked up his knife and fork again, going for another mouthful of waffle before pausing. “Wait, days?” Carlos cocked his head in confusion at the statement. “I only got into town yesterday, I wasn’t expecting you until this evening at the earliest, but more likely tomorrow or the day after.”

Rochelle and Dave had started shaking their heads while Carlos was speaking.

“You went ahead of us five days ago Carlos. And it only took us five days because we got a flat tyre and had to wait on a tow truck and repairs.” Nilanjana said softly, chewing on her lip.

“No, no no, that _can’t_ be right. I got here this time yesterday, and I drove pretty constantly for two days to get here. What day is it?” Carlos babbled, tugging his phone out of his pocket to check, and ignoring the new message that had come through from Cecil at some point.

“Friday.” Stan said, checking his watch for the date. “The 23rd. 11:25am, if you wanted that too.” He turned back to his notebook, skimming through the pages intently.

Carlos laid his phone flat on the table, the clock open and stating it was 1:20pm on Wednesday the 20th.

Nilanjana was the first to pull out her phone to compare the times. “My battery died last night, and I haven’t turned it on since.” She explained as she powered it up and laid it on the table, glancing sideways as Dave did the same, his phone’s display matching the time and date of Stan’s watch.

The scientists watched seriously, Stan murmuring early theories to himself while they waited. “Temporal displacement, temporal distortion, temporal fracture?”

Nilanjana’s phone finished starting up and they all gaped when it showed the time to be 6:30pm on Thursday the 22nd.

“What? How?” Dave asked rhetorically, running a hand through his hair while Stan turned to a new page in his notebook and started writing, all but ripping the page with his pen in his haste. Nilanjana restarted her phone, muttering about how that couldn’t be right and the restart should fix it.

Carlos sighed heavily and scooped his phone off the table, deciding to check the message from Cecil while his team panicked and hissed theories at each other.

‘Oh, of course. Science is very important, I understand completely. Maybe another time, when Science has settled down.’ Cecil had sent, finishing it with three smiles and a heart. Carlos rubbed at his forehead and let a reluctant smile slink across his face, exasperated at Cecil’s unwavering enthusiasm but also glad that the radio host hadn’t been offended or hurt by Carlos’ refusal to meet for coffee.

Carlos tucked his phone back into his pocket and returned to his breakfast, taking another mouthful and listening to his team’s discussion.

 

On the other side of town, sprawled in his bed, Cecil pressed his face further into his pillow, berating himself and cursing every god he could name.

“Stupid, _stupid_ Cecil. Of _course_ he doesn’t have time to meet for coffee, he has _Science_ to be doing.” Cecil heaved himself upright and out of bed, still scoffing at himself while he pushed his feet into his cat slippers, careful not to catch himself on the protective barbs. Cecil stood and yawned, stretching his arms out before slumping and scoffing at himself as he made his way to the bathroom to shower. “Like he’d even be interested in you, with such perfect hair and all.”

 

Back in the Moonlight All-Nite Diner, Carlos was whispering into his coffee mug for the check, as per the instructions given to him by the lovely couple in the next booth over, who took pity on him when they saw him try to get the check from a passing waiter. Carlos tucked a handful of notes under the sugar tray and, when the gulping sound was heard by Dave, ushered his team out of the diner and into the parking lot.

“Okay so,” Carlos started, clearing his throat and hoping he sounded like a proper leader. “We have no food at all at the lab, but we also don’t have a fridge yet, so, uh, I’m not sure what to do about that. We do still need some things from Target but they can wait and the lab still needs some cleaning so uhm. How about we all head back there to start and then we can work out what to do from there.” Carlos tugged his phone out of the pocket to check the time before remembering that it probably didn’t show the real time anyway and idly spinning it in his hands. “When the lab’s all set up then we can start investigating some things.” Carlos nodded, more to himself than his team, and turned to walk to his car before pausing and looking back at his team. “Uhm. Does anyone want to ride with me? Or are you all going to stay with the van?” He asked, fumbling his keys out of his pocket as he spoke.

“Ooh I’ll go with you boss!” Rochelle called, bouncing on her heels and all but running around to the passenger side of the car.

“Oookay then.” Carlos said, not entirely sure what to make of his coworker’s enthusiasm. He unlocked the car so Rochelle could climb in and turned back to the rest of the team. “Make sure you stick close guys, I don’t want you to get lost or anything. If you do lose sight of us pull over and call okay? The geography here can be… weird.” Carlos gave a final nod and a half wave to his team as he climbed into his car, starting the ignition and sighing as the air conditioning turned on and washed over him. He dropped his phone in the cup holder and pulled his seatbelt on, idling while he gave the others time to get in the van and ready to go.

“If anyone calls, answer it.” Carlos said, leaning forwards to inspect the fuel gauge, making a mental note to refill on the trip to Target later, and pointing at his phone. “It might be the others getting lost and we’ll need to help them quickly.”

Rochelle hummed in acknowledgement, smirking when Carlos looked over at her in confusion.

“What?” He asked, starting to pull out of the parking space slowly, looking and waiting for the van to follow his lead.

“So, Cecil huh?” Rochelle said, voice dripping with suggestion, her grin growing as Carlos’ cheeks darkened with a blush.

“Uh, C-Cecil?” Carlos stammered, cursing his shaking voice as he locked his eyes on the road and not Rochelle’s growing grin.

“Yu-huh. _Cecil_.” Rochelle pressed, leaning over the console to press her shoulder to Carlos’. “Who is he?” Her questions reminded Carlos of his big sister in the best way, easy familiarity and care obvious in her voice and crows-footed smile.

“He’s the radio host.” Carlos said, shrugging Rochelle off and turning off Earl Street while he could still see the Dog Park looming ahead rather than risk getting caught in a geographical loop again. “We met yesterday at the town meeting I had to hold. He’s…” Carlos paused, waving his hand vaguely while he thought of the right word. “Eager. Enthusiastic. I don’t know.” He sighed, risking a glance at Rochelle and cringing at the grin still settled on her face. “Why?”

“Enthusiastic is certainly one word for it.” Rochelle said, giving a soft chuckle. “You said the show we heard on the way in was a repeat of last night, yeah?” Carlos nodded, waiting for Rochelle to make her point. “How much of it did you hear when you listened to it?” She asked as they made a left turn past an antiques store with something jumping around in the front window.

“I heard mention of the Dog Park, then nothing until he was talking about the town meeting, but I only heard the start of that. Uh,” Carlos paused to think and focus on navigating the five right-turns past houses and a building that claimed to be the library but had no front doors. “I think the only other thing I heard was about the sunset, which I asked Cecil to talk about.” Carlos tapped his fingers against the steering wheel, taking a moment to check that the van was still visible in his rearview mirror. “Oh! I heard something about NRA slogans.” Carlos chewed his lip and thought, eventually nodding to himself. “Yeah that’s all I heard. Why? Did you hear something I should have heard?” Carlos’ brow furrowed as he worried about what he could have missed.

Carlos glanced across at Rochelle, surprised to find her biting her hand, her eyes lit up with mirth.

“Rochelle?” He asked, chuckling softly, awkwardly, as Rochelle pulled her hand from her mouth and let out a gasping laugh.

“Oh my God you didn’t hear?!” She laughed, all but rolling in her seat with it. “Holy crap that’s amazing wow.” Rochelle gasped, wiping a tear from her eye.

Carlos stiffened in his seat, hands clenching on the steering wheel as he came to a stop at a red light. “What did he say?” He asked hesitantly, wondering if it was more of the ‘perfect’ chatter or something else. What if it was something sinister? Something dangerous to him? Surely Rochelle wouldn’t find that funny but what if it was something that seemed innocent but was really a threat?

Rochelle’s final gasped laugh pulled Carlos out of his spiralling thoughts and made him realise the light had turned green.

“He was talking about a newcomer to town.” Rochelle started, not having noticed Carlos’ tenseness. “He said…” She trailed off with another soft laugh. “He was questioning your ‘perfect and beautiful haircut’ and your ‘perfect and beautiful coat’.” Rochelle’s voice was thick with restrained laughter as she spoke and Carlos relaxed.

“Oh. _That_.” He said simply, shrugging the comments off.

“‘That’?” Rochelle asked incredulously, sitting up straight in her seat to fix Carlos with a look. “That’s all you have to say about it? He practically declared his love for you _on air_.”

“At the town meeting yesterday he asked me how I got my hair to look so perfect.” Carlos explained, shrugging again. “It was weird, but nothing like a declaration of love.” Carlos shot Rochelle a look just daring her to contradict him.

“Okay, but-” Rochelle was cut off by Carlos’ phone ringing and she sighed and picked it up, not looking before answering. “You guys were just behind us a second ago how’d you lose us?” She asked, rolling her eyes at Carlos, pausing mid-gesture as the person on the phone replied. “O-oh, I’m sorry I thought someone else was calling.” She said, smirking at Carlos when he sent her a puzzled look. “Yes, this is Carlos’ phone, but he’s busy right now. Can I take a message?”

Carlos was already shaking his head and holding his hand out for his phone. “Pass it here Rochelle, who is it?”

Rochelle tilted the phone away from her mouth to chastise Carlos. “Nu-uh, no talking on the phone while driving, Carlos.”

Carlos sighed heavily. “Then put it on speaker, come on Rochelle.” Carlos said, glaring at her until Rochelle relented.

“Hold on a second, I’m going to put you on speaker.” She said into the phone, waiting for acknowledgement before pulling the phone away from her ear to put it on speaker.

“Carlos here, how can I help?” Carlos asked, making the final turn onto the lab’s street.

“Oh, Carlos!” Carlos cringed slightly as Cecil’s voice came from his phone, side-eyed Rochelle and her put-on innocent grin.

“Hi Cecil, what can I do for you?”

“Well, Carlos, dear Carlos, I was wondering if you’d like to come in sometime and do an interview with me? For all the listeners who couldn’t make it to your town meeting yesterday and missed your wonderful voice and perfect hair and all your _very Scientific_ explanations.” Carlos felt his cheeks heat up as Cecil spoke, his smooth voice dropping compliments like they were nothing.

“U-uhm well, Cecil.” Carlos started, glaring at Rochelle’s suggestive eyebrow waggling. “I don’t know that I’ll have time to come by the station today. Or, in fact, when I will have time.” Carlos heard Cecil’s soft noise of disappointment and cursed softly. “But I might be able to send one of my team over?” He suggested instead. “Rochelle here should be able to answer any questions you or your listeners might have.”

“Me?” Rochelle asked in surprise.

“And I’m sure she’d be _just delighted_ to help the community out.” Carlos added, shooting Rochelle a smirk of his own.

“O-Of course! I’d be happy to help.” Rochelle said brightly, even while glaring at Carlos.

“Well, if you’re sure _you_ won’t be able to make it, sweet Carlos…” Cecil trailed off, voice so full of hope it made Carlos’ heart squeeze in his chest.

“I’m sorry Cecil, I still have a lot to do today. I’ll send Rochelle over later, what time would be best?” Carlos chewed on his lip and studiously ignored Rochelle’s reinstated grin, pulling into the lab driveway and parking.

“Oh, hm, well,” Cecil paused, the sound of shuffling papers coming over the phone. “Station Management usually takes a nap around three thirty? So how about then?”

“Three thirty sounds great Cecil.” Carlos confirmed. “Oh, wait, just out of interest, what time does your clock say right now?”

“My clock? Ooh is this for Science?!” Cecil asked and Carlos could picture him bouncing in his seat.

“Sure. It’s for an… experiment in progress.” Carlos said, taking his phone from Rochelle’s hand and climbing out of his car.

“Well, I’m _very_ into Science these days,” Cecil purred. “Also my clock says 1:45.”

“Thank you Cecil, that’s very helpful.” Carlos said, brow furrowing as he read the time from his phone as 2:05. “I’ll be sure to have Rochelle to you at three thirty. Bye Cecil.”

“Oh! Bye Carlos!” Cecil called and Carlos hung up, fixing Rochelle with a focussed stare.

“Not a word to the others about that, other than you’re giving an interview, okay?” He said, pointing at her forcefully and ignoring the flush on his cheeks.

“Scouts honour.” Rochelle answered, raising three fingers in the air and making Carlos scoff.

“Shut up, you were never a scout.” He said, watching the van pull into the driveway next to his car.

“Still counts though, I do mean it.” Rochelle countered, turning to look at the lab for the first time.

Carlos shook his head and sighed. “Fine, whatever.” The others piled out of the van and gathered in a loose pack in front of Carlos. “This is the lab, bottom two floors are workspaces, top floor is living. Get your essentials for now, I’m sure you all want showers or whatever so.... Yeah, come on.” Carlos waited while they all picked various suitcases and backpacks out of the back of the van, a variety of hushed ‘I’m sorry’s and ‘excuse me’s coming from the group.

The man from the previous day was stood on his balcony again and Carlos waved at him, this time getting a jerky head nod in response. When the team was ready to go and both vehicles were locked Carlos led them inside and showed them the space.

“Wow, this space is seriously cool.” Nilanjana said, turning on the spot as she examined the space.

“Upstairs there’s a bunch of, uh, little cubicles? We can keep them if you can think of uses but it shouldn’t be hard to take them apart if that would be more useful too.” Carlos said, hands tucked in his pockets while he watched the others run around.

“Do these work?” Dave asked, pointing at the fume cupboards before leaning into one and looking up the ventilation shaft.

“I don’t know, I haven’t had the time to test them. You can do that this afternoon.” Carlos said, grinning when Dave sighed and muttered something to himself with a head shake.

“Well then, I’m going to call first dibs on the shower so I can get started on that.” He called to the room, adjusting his backpack over his shoulder and heading for the stairs.

“Too slow!” Rochelle called from the second floor, laughing and turning to run up the second set of stairs.

“Oh, you wanna bet?” Dave called after her, dropping his backpack and launching towards the stairs with his travel bag and a grin.

“Children, please,” Carlos called with a laugh. “No running in the lab!”

Twin calls of “yes, boss” floated down the stairs, but Carlos could still hear the thudded footsteps of someone running followed by a brief, cut-off squeal.

“God damnit.” He muttered to himself, pressing a hand to his forehead. He turned back to the others two scientists still on the first floor, Stan, already sat at one of the counters and still writing in his notebook, and Nilanjana, slowly making her way around the lab opening every cupboard and inspecting them all.

“Which of you two wants to stay here and which wants to come with me to Target and whatever supermarket we can find?” Carlos asked, tugging his phone from his pocket and blinking blandly at the 2:45 it claimed was the time.

“Ooh I’ll come!” Nilanjana called, all but bouncing over from the corner she’d been inspecting. “Just lemme put my stuff upstairs first.”

“Okay, sure” Carlos shot a smile at Nilanjana. “While you’re up there can you tell Rochelle that she needs to be ready to go in, uhm.” Carlos paused to do some quick mental math, trying to work out time conversions and giving up with a sigh. “Tell her to be ready to go in an hour, and tell Dave that he needs to drop her at the radio station and then go out to the Route… 800 was it?” Carlos gave his hand a vague wave, “wherever it is, the seismological monitoring station. We’ll need baselines for what the activity around here is like.”

“Sure thing Boss!” Nilanjana said, giving Carlos a joking salute before heading upstairs to pass the messages along.

“Stan,” Carlos started, turning to the scientist sat at the counter, still writing in his notebook.

“Mhmm?” Stan hummed, turning his head slightly without taking his eyes off the page.

“I need you to make sure the others leave here on time. Also someone needs to at least vacuum the rest of the top floor, and the second floor. Can you stay on top of that?” Carlos asked, frowning as Stan just nodded and hummed, chewing on his pen and counting something on his fingers. “Stan, are you listening?”

“Yeah boss, get Rochelle and Dave out on time, clean upstairs. Got it.”

Carlos sighed, shaking his head with a fond smile at Stan who was clearly deeply invested in whatever theory he was working on. “Thanks Stan.” Carlos stepped over to pat Stan’s shoulder. “I can’t wait to hear whatever you’re working on.”

Stan looked up at Carlos, looking younger than ever, all wide eyed and hopeful. “Really boss?”

“Absolutely. It’s gotta be good, you’ve barely looked up from your notes since you started.” Carlos grinned easily, giving Stan’s shoulder a reassuring squeeze before stepping away.

Stan grinned widely, ducking his head too late to hide it. “Thanks boss.”

“You’re welcome, and please, no need for the ‘boss’. I’m really only in charge of all the paperwork. Everyone’s gonna have free reign, more or less.”

“Does that mean I can build Frankenstein’s monster?” Nilanjana called from the second floor, startling both Carlos and Stan.

“No. Creating life in the lab is a big no-no.” Carlos said, attempting to sound forceful despite the laugh threatening to spill out.

“Aww, you’re no fun.” Nilanjana said with a faux pout, disappearing from sight to make her way downstairs.

“Too bad. That’s one of a few rules we’re going to have in place. But that can wait.” Carlos said, tugging his keys from his pocket and twirling them around his finger. “You ready to go?”

“Definitely. Let’s go!” Nilanjana led the way to the lab door, all but skipping out and leaving Carlos behind, shaking his head slowly.

“Kids.” He scoffed playfully, shooting a wink at Stan. “Have fun, don’t burn the place down.” Carlos said as he followed Nilanjana outside.

“I make no promises!” Stan called after him, laughing softly before turning back to his work.

oOo

Carlos’ second trip to Target was only mildly less interesting than his first one. The bedding department was at the same angle as the rest of the store, which made shopping in it easier, but the range of Spiderwolf fur blankets and ‘Rabbit-scale’ pillow cases left Carlos utterly baffled. Nilanjana insisted on getting a range of blankets and pillows, partially for the novelty of it all, and partially to further her research.

“I’m a biologist, Carlos.” She’d argued, hands on hips and a near-pout on her lips. “I can _study_ these you know?”

Carlos had sighed and let her pile twice as many blankets and pillows into their cart as they actually needed, hefting their cart around to point towards the checkouts instead of arguing against Nilanjana.

They made it halfway to the checkouts before one of the displays caught Carlos’ attention, making him pull the cart to a rough stop to stare in confusion at the boxes.

“Grow your own Bloodstones?” Carlos picked one of the boxes off the shelf, making a surprised noise at its weight and turning it in his hands to read the contents list.

“Bloodstone as in Heliotrope?” Nilanjana asked, picking another box off the shelf.

“Apparently.” Carlos muttered, brow furrowed as he looked over the box contents. “Instructions, chant book, mould, ceremonial dagger, ritual candle and crushed jasper?” Carlos read aloud, his voice pitching upwards with disbelief. “I’m not a geologist, but I’m pretty sure that’s not how bloodstone works.” He said, sharing a bemused look with Nilanjana.

“So we’re gonna get a few and run some tests, right?” Nilanjana asked rhetorically, already tucking her box into the cart amongst the pillows.

“Of course. What kind of scientists would we be if we didn’t? We can have Dave look at them first thing tomorrow.” Carlos agreed, throwing his box into the cart and continuing towards the checkouts, pulling into a counter with the same cashier as the previous day.

“Hello again Mr Scientist!” The cashier greeted with a grin, showing off their fangs.

“Hello, how’re you today?” Carlos asked while he unloaded the cart onto the conveyer belt.

“Not too bad, sir. We’ve only had one escape attempt from the toys today, much better than yesterday.” The cashier chatted easily, still scanning all their products with a hard to follow speed, only pausing when it came to the bloodstone kits. “Ah, Mr Scientist, you know, these don’t produce City Council sanctioned Ritual Bloodstones, you’d be better off visiting the Bloodstone factory if you need a set…” The cashier’s hands hovered around the boxes, almost afraid to scan them through. “These kits are more for the school kids, so they can learn how the stones are made without risking a field trip to the factory floor.”

“Oh, of course,” Carlos said, feigning comprehension. “Bloodstones aren’t, uhm, common, where we’re from. We’ll be sure to get some uh, City Council sanctioned Bloodstones for… other purposes. These kits are just to satiate our curiosity.”

The cashier gave a relieved sigh and nodded, scanning the boxes through and tucking them into a bag. “Oh, that’s fine then sir.” They gave a charming grin and started scanning the mass of blankets Nilanjana had selected. “You can never tell with outsiders, you know? Sometimes they know things and sometimes, well… we all hear the screams in the night.” The cashier gave a low chuckle that made Carlos shudder.

“Of course, of course.” Carlos nodded, glancing at Nilanjana who was frantically typing away on her phone. A sidestep and brief glance over her shoulder told Carlos that she was taking notes about the apparent importance of Bloodstones and a point to visit the factory some time before she tucked her phone away and started putting all their bags into the cart again.

“And I wouldn’t want to be the cause of Night Vale’s favourite scientist getting taken by the Sheriff's Secret Police.” Carlos felt his cheeks heat up as the cashier winked at him, smirking a little.

“Y-yes, well.” Carlos stammered, looking away from the cashier and pulling his wallet out in preparation of paying for the shopping. He could feel Nilanjana’s eyes on him and he knew he was going to get questioned about that comment for the rest of the outing.

Carlos swiped his card through the card reader, not even looking at the total before pricking his thumb and dragging it across the signature line on the receipt the cashier handed to him before passing it back.

“Aand here’s your copy, have a good day Mr Scientist, Miss Scientist.” The cashier said, grinning broadly again and waving them out of the store.

“Thank you, you too.” Carlos responded automatically, pushing the cart through the doors towards his car.

“Soo…” Nilanjana said, skipping alongside Carlos and grinning. “Not one but two admirers already? You’ve been busy bossman.”

Carlos sighed and rolled his eyes, unlocking his car and shoving the pillows and blankets in wherever they would fit amongst the equipment and boxes he was yet to take out. “Not really. It’s because of Cecil. Apparently he said my hair was perfect on the radio yesterday.”

Nilanjana watched with amusement as Carlos struggled to make everything fit into the limited space he had. “I mean, your hair is pretty perfect. I would kill for hair like yours.”

Carlos laughed, sharp and bitter as he forced the back of his car closed. “Perfect, sure.” Carlos handed the bag with the bloodstone kits to Nilanjana before whirling the empty cart around and taking it over to the cart return.

When he returned to the car Nilanjana was sitting in the passenger seat, arms crossed over her chest and a frown parked firmly on her face.

“Look, Carlos,” She started as he climbed in and started the engine, “I know you have a multitude of issues, and I get it, trust me, I get it,” Nilanjana paused, giving her words weight and a meaning that Carlos hadn’t considered. “But you do have good hair, and face it, he could be saying worse things.”

“I’m sorry Nils, I just.” Carlos sighed, pulling out of the parking lot and starting an aimless drive through the streets of Night Vale. “I know I’m far from perfect, perfect is a scientifically unattainable status, and it makes me itch to hear it applied to myself like this.”

Nilanjana reached across to pat Carlos’ forearm. “I get it, really bossman, but y’know, don’t take your frustration out on yourself or us. Maybe you should talk to Cecil about it?” She suggested, rubbing at Carlos’ arm with her thumb until he relaxed a little.

“Maybe. I’ll see.” Carlos conceded with a sigh. “For now, we don’t really have room for groceries in here, so maybe we just head back and get Big Rico’s for dinner?”

“Sounds like a plan, boss.” Nilanjana said, taking her hand off Carlos’ arm and pulling one of the bloodstone kits out to examine it better.

“Don’t open that in the car.” Carlos said, turning towards the lab and veering slightly around a pothole in the road. “I don’t want to have to clean powdered jasper from the seats.”

“Sure, sure boss.” Nilanjana said, waving away Carlos’ concerns. “I’m just gonna read the instructions, promise.” She tugged a pocket knife from her pocket and used it to slice through the tape on the box, lifting the lid and looking at the contents. “Oh wow there actually is a dagger in here.” She gasped, pulling out the blade in question and turning it over in her hands.

“And that’s for kids?” Carlos asked, side-eyeing it as he turned into the lab’s driveway.

“Apparently.” Nilanjana was grinning, running her hands over the decorated hilt and fingering the point of the blade. “Lemme tell you, I would have loved this as a kid.”

“Well how about you help me unload and then you can play with it all you want.” Carlos offered, opening his door and pausing, turning back to face Nilanjana. “And hey, Nils? Thanks for earlier.”

“Don’t worry about it boss,” Nilanjana said, dropping the dagger back into its box and closing it up. “We gotta look out for each other here, both as part of a team and as, well, us.” She gave Carlos a bright grin and climbed out of his car, hooking the bloodstone kit’s bag over her arm and heading to the back to carry some of the pillows and blankets in too.

“Do you wanna bring in any of this other stuff while we’re at it?” Nilanjana asked, filling her arms with bags and looking to pick up one of Carlos’ boxes on top of them.

“Nah, it’d be better to leave them. I wouldn’t be able to work out where to put half of them cause I need to separate my personal things from the general lab things.” Carlos said, grunting as he worked to extract a bag that had been trapped by boxes shifting during their drive back.

“Wow, nerd much?” Nilanjana teased lightly, tugging the offending box to the side and sending Carlos sprawling with the sudden release of his bag, as well as a small meter of some kind which bounced off the ground, turning on and immediately letting out a high-pitched squeal.

Both Carlos and Nilanjana stared at the squealing machine before Carlos thought to grab it and turn it off, staring wide-eyed at the scale on it.

“What is that?” Nilanjana asked, peering over Carlos’ shoulder.

“A Geiger counter.” Carlos said softly, staring at it in something like fear.

“.....No. No way.” Nilanjana said, backing away slowly. “What was it reading?”

“I-I didn’t see.” Carlos swallowed loudly and braced himself before turning the meter back on, reading from the scale quickly so he could turn it off again. “It’s too high. It maxed out the reader.” He breathed, voice barely shaking despite his shock.

“...what’s the max that can get?” Nilanjana asked softly, leaning forwards despite herself.

“50,000 cpm.”

The pair stared at each other in silence until Nilanjana began laughing, borderline hysterical, while Carlos pulled himself off the ground. He tucked the Geiger counter into the bag wrapped around his wrist and pulled the back of his car shut, wrapping a loose arm around Nilanjana’s shoulders and leading her inside gently.

The door was only a minor obstacle due to the sheer amount of pillows they were carrying, but once through it, it was easy for Carlos to get Nilanjana to put her bags down and sit at the counter, taking some deep slow breaths.

“That’s so much radiation. Too much radiation.” Nilanjana all but sobbed, calming down and looking at Carlos with fear in her eyes. “How dangerous is it? That much?”

“I don’t know. I’ll look into it, and try and work out where it’s coming from. You just stay here for now, help Stan get the bedrooms set up.” Carlos said softly, squeezing her shoulders before stepping away. “I’m gonna run upstairs and make sure Stan knows you’re here, just keep breathing like that Nils.”

Nilanjana gave a terse nod and a weak smile as Carlos ran to the stairs, taking them two at a time and arriving at the top floor out of breath.

“Oh, hey Bo- Carlos!” Stan called, sticking his head out of the closest bedroom with a smile. He had a dusting cloth tied around his head like a bandana and a smear of blue something across his cheek. “How was Target and stuff?”

“Basically the same as yesterday.” Carlos panted, swallowing dryly as he regained his breath. “Nils’ downstairs having a little bit of a panic attack though, uh we should probably head back down to her.”

“What? Why?” Stan asked, dropping something to the floor and crossing the room in a handful of long strides.

“We dropped a Geiger counter unloading the car and there’s more than 50,000 cpm in the immediate area.” Carlos explained briefly on the way downstairs, noticing the second floor was practically sparkling clean now he wasn’t rushing through. “Nice job cleaning.” He commented, throwing an appreciative smile over his shoulder at Stan.

“Thanks,” Stan replied, flushing slightly as they started down the second set of stairs. “The radio makes for great background noise, did you know there’s a woman who claims there are Angels living with her?”

“Angels? Huh. Make a note of it.” Carlos said, striding across the open lab floor to Nilanjana’s side. “We really should start a proper list of things to investigate. Nils, how’re you doing?”

“Better. Breathing helps.” Nilanjana answered with a rough smile.

“Good, good.” Carlos answered, slightly distracted as he felt his phone buzz in his pocket. He tugged it out and startled at the three messages waiting for him, one from Rochelle requesting a pick up and two from Dave.

One of the messages from Dave was about the seismographic monitoring station, telling Carlos that the readings didn’t make sense, even though Dave had checked all the machines and they were all in working order. The other made less sense, if that was possible, talking about a house that existed but didn’t exist at the same time, in the Desert Creek development.

‘If you’re done at the monitoring station come back and get Nils and Stan, I’m going to pick up Rochelle and we’ll meet at the House. What’s the address?’ Carlos replied, tuning back into Stan and Nilanjana’s conversation where they were now talking about the bloodstone kits.

“Unfortunately,” Carlos started, cutting into the conversation with an apologetic look, “that will have to wait. Dave’s on his way to pick you up to investigate a house that apparently doesn’t exist. I have to go pick up Rochelle.”

“What do you mean a house that doesn’t exist?” Stan asked, a frown creeping across his face.

“I have no idea. We’ll all find out together.” Carlos said, backing slowly towards the door. “If you could get all of those upstairs, that’d be great too!” He called, gesturing to the bags of pillows and blankets before turning around and leaving the lab.

oOo

The drive to the radio station was uneventful, albeit loud because of the Geiger counter Carlos had set up on his dashboard for the trip. The scale may have maxed out, the needle hovering solidly at the ‘50,000 cpm’ end of the dial, but the sound indication was good up to nearly 4,500,000 cpm, though when it got higher than 1,000,000 it got harder to tell the variations apart. Carlos spent most of the drive caught between wincing at the noise of the Geiger counter and feeling some kind of sick anticipation at finding the source of all the radiation. The anticipation faded, however, as he got closer and closer to the radio station and the pitch of the counter kept climbing upwards.

The Geiger counter hit it’s near-highest pitch as Carlos pulled into the radio station parking lot and he chewed on his lip, torn between getting away from there as soon as possible and investigating further.

“Fuck it.” Carlos gave in with a sigh just as Rochelle climbed in, giving him a puzzled look as he turned the engine off and grabbed his Geiger counter, climbing out of his car and walking up the three steps to the station front door.

Once inside the noise of the Geiger counter seemed so much louder and disruptive that Carlos fumbled and dropped the machine in his haste to mute it, gaining him a raised eyebrow from the intern standing behind the desk.

“Hi, I’m Intern Jerry, how can I help you?” The intern said with a forced grin and glassy eyes.

“Uh, I’m Carlos? The Scientist, I was wondering if I could come in and take some…. Measurements. Of uh, Materials.” Carlos said, gesturing vaguely with his now-silent Geiger counter, watching from the corner of his eye as the needle just waved at the ‘50,000 cpm’ point on the scale.

“Oooh, so _you’re_ Carlos.” Intern Jerry said, his grin smoothing into a more natural form though his eyes remained glassy. “You can go right in Mr Scientist, Cecil will be _thrilled_ he wasn’t expecting you to be able to make it today, you know.” The intern leaned forward to rest his elbow on the counter and resting his chin on his hand in turn. “His office-slash-recording studio is on the second floor, it’ll be the only one with the lights on. Go on.” Intern Jerry made a waving motion with his free hand and blew up at his fringe which was falling into his eyes.

“Uh, sure. Thank you?” Carlos said, uncertain and stumbling over his own feet as he made his way to the stairs. On the way up he fiddled with his Geiger counter, turning the sound back on but with the volume down low, gulping audibly over it as the exact pitch registered with his ears. “That has to be somewhere between 1,000,000 and 3,000,000.” Carlos muttered to himself, running a shaky hand through his hair. “That’s ridiculous, no one should be able to work here safely, this building needs to be evacuated _oh god I sent Rochelle in here willingly_.” Carlos mumbled, voicing his thoughts in an attempt to remain calm, even as he tripped up the last three steps and all but fell onto the carpet of the station hallway.

“I need to get Cecil out of here, and his intern.” Carlos told himself as he straightened his clothes from his fall. “And find a way to isolate the source. Oh god what could the source be that’s giving off this much radiation?” Carlos’ hands were shaking as he made his way down the hall towards the only lit-up doorway, one running almost obsessively through his hair while the other held onto his Geiger counter with a death grip.

He reached the door and hesitated, shaking his hands out and preparing to knock gently. Carlos took a deep breath and rapped three times, a soft noise to let Cecil know there was someone at the door but hopefully not loud enough to be picked up by the microphone.

Carlos was only kept waiting for a few seconds before the door was pulled open and Cecil was standing there, a hand on his cocked hip and an unimpressed frown on his face.

“Intern Jerry, what have I told you about-” Cecil cut himself off with a squeak as a hand came up to cover his mouth and his cheeks turned red. “Carlos!” He said, voice muffled by his hand.

“Hi Cecil,” Carlos said, coughing to cover the way his voice came out much higher than it meant to. “I hope I’m not, uh, interrupting anything? I just wanted to do some testing?” Carlos held up his Geiger counter, internally cringing at the way his voice shook with his stress.

Cecil gasped, lowering his hand from his mouth to welcome Carlos into his studio.

“Of course, sweet Carlos. Anything for Science.” Cecil gushed, tucking himself into the corner of the small booth, giving Carlos reign of the space. “I know we just had Rochelle on the show, but could I tempt you to stay for an interview?” Cecil asked hopefully, watching Carlos wave his counter over the booth with intense motions.

“Not right now, Cecil.” Carlos said dismissively, too focussed on pacing the booth to properly listen to what Cecil was saying.

The Geiger counter’s noises kept getting higher and higher, especially the closer it got to the microphone. Carlos cursed softly to himself, brow furrowed and teeth clenched in concern as he held the Geiger counter to the microphone.

When the counter got within a few inches of the microphone it reached a new pitch that Carlos had never heard from it before, a multi-toned broken series of notes that cut off soon after as the machine spontaneously shut down.

“Cecil,” Carlos started, staring at the now-broken counter in his hand. “You need to get out of here, evacuate the building.”

“But Carlos, darling Carlos, I have to finish my show.” Cecil countered, flushing as Carlos’ head jerked up to look at him.

“Cecil it’s _not safe here_.” Carlos said, fighting the urge to just grab Cecil and drag him from the station.

“Is anywhere really ever safe?” Cecil gave a gentle smile, shaking his head and looking at Carlos through his fringe. “Really Carlos, I consider myself to be a professional who would never leave in the middle of a broadcast.”

Carlos felt his cheeks heat as Cecil fixed him with an almost hungry gaze.

“Can you,” Carlos paused and sighed, shaking his head and running a hand through his hair. “At least promise to leave as soon as your show is done? It’s not…” Carlos gulped and looked away from Cecil, hoping to hide the growing flush on his cheeks. “It’s not safe for you to be so close to, to _that_ for a long time.” Carlos looked back to Cecil, pointing at the microphone accusingly.

“Oh, Carlos,” Cecil cooed, melting the second he saw the worry on Carlos’ face. “Of course, as soon as I can I’ll leave. I promise.”

Carlos nodded and bit his lip roughly, dragging a shaking hand through his hair and looking to the door. “I, uh, I should be going.” He said, voice thick with protests and arguments to get Cecil to come with him immediately.

Cecil made a soft noise of disappointment but no move to stop Carlos, instead circling his desk and settling back into his seat. “Of course, have a good evening sweetest Carlos.”

Carlos nodded, hesitating in the doorway and looking at Cecil one final time. “You too Cecil. And thank you. Take care.” Carlos gave a half-wave and swept out of the room and down the stairs, barely waving a goodbye to Intern Jerry before piling himself into his car and banging his head against the steering wheel.

“So, what was all that about?” Rochelle asked, not looking up from her phone as Carlos rolled his head to look at her.

“Literally life-ending amounts of radiation coming from Cecil’s microphone. Broke my Geiger counter. Made a fool of myself.” Carlos groaned, forcing himself upright and starting his car. “Also Dave found a house that doesn’t exist so we’re meeting the others there and then I’m going back to the lab to drown myself in the shower so I never have to look anyone in the eye again.”

“Okay Mr Melodrama.” Rochelle scoffed. “Cecil talks about you like you hung the moon, I don’t think anything you could do would ruin that. The radiation is worrying though.”

“I doubt that. I told him about the radiation and told him he needed to evacuate and he looked at me like I had a concussion. ‘Darling Carlos’ he said ‘I have to finish my show’” Carlos let out a loud groan as they came to a stop at a red light, flopping forwards to bang his head on the steering wheel. “And I let him stay. He could die and I let him stay there. The intern too.”

Rochelle reached out to pat Carlos’ shoulder soothingly. “There’s only one way to find out if that changed anything.” She said, flicking the radio on and turning the volume up.

“...they know about us now, and we might be hearing from them very soon.” Cecil’s voice poured from the radio, smooth and silken and wrapping around Carlos as the light turned green and he turned towards the Desert Creek development. “Carlos, perfect and beautiful,” Cecil continued, making Carlos’ just-fading flush spring up again, “came into our studios during the break earlier but declined to stay for an interview.”

“There we go, he still thinks you’re perfect.” Rochelle said, turning the radio down until it became background noise.

“That’s not necessarily any better you know.” Carlos muttered, shifting in his seat as they passed the Desert Creek sign. “Did Dave text you the address of this house?” He asked, turning down a street aimlessly and scanning it for the rest of the team.

“Yeah, 25 Sand Dune Ave.” Rochelle said, pointing out a street sign to their left and grabbing onto her seatbelt as Carlos made the sharp turn.

“But still,” Carlos argued as he rolled down the road, looking for the team van, or number 25. “What kind of scientist lets someone stay somewhere so dangerous?” He asked, spotting the van and pulling off the road behind it. “I should have been more insistent.”

“Carlos, you may have some bizarre kind of influence over Cecil because of your hair, but even you can’t make a grown man do something he doesn’t want to.” Rochelle said bluntly, climbing out of the car and making her way to where the others were milling about awkwardly.

Carlos sighed and followed her, turning to address Dave while watching the others stare at the house.

“So, what’s happening at the monitoring station?” Caros asked first, figuring that would be easier to explain than the house.

Dave let out a long sigh and shook his head. “The readings don’t make sense. There’s like 5 seismographs there and they’re all registering consecutive earthquakes that are 5 or higher on the Richter scale.” Dave side-eyed Carlos, waiting for a reaction.

Carlos just sighed and kicked at the grass at his feet. “Fucking hell.” He muttered. “Are you sure?”

Dave nodded, tugging one of his hands from his pocket to wave it around. “I took them all apart and reassembled them and the same thing happened. And they’re not all exactly the same. The ones furthest from town were registering between 0.1 and 0.2 lower than the ones closest so they seem to be right, but there’s no way we wouldn’t feel these.” Dave cleared his throat and joined Carlos in kicking at the ground. “What is this town Carlos?”

“I don’t know Dave. I have no fucking idea.” Carlos said, voice flat and tired. “Tell me about this house and then we can go back to the lab. I think we all need an early dinner and some sleep.”

“Sounds fair.” Dave nodded at Carlos to take a step closer with him. “So this house looks like a normal house, and it would make sense for it to exist, there are two identical houses on either side of it, yeah?”

“Sure seems to be Dave.” Carlos answered, blinking slowly as he tucked his hands into his pocket.

“Well turn your head just slightly to the side and look at it out of the corner of your eye.”

Carlos followed Dave’s instructions and as he turned the house disappeared from his view. He turned back to face it head on and he could see it again.

“You know, that doesn’t really prove much. Sorry Dave, humans have blind spots.” Carlos muttered, pulling his phone from his pocket to check the time. 

“That’s what I thought too, but look at it through a camera.” 

Carlos rolled his eyes but did as Dave asked, opening his camera and holding it out in front of him, prepared for no difference. 

“What.” Carlos said, looking between his phone and the house in front of him, the house that didn’t appear on his camera that was very clearly _right in front of his eyes_.

“I know.” Dave said, a smile growing on his face as Carlos gaped and tried to find something to say.

“That doesn’t make sense.”

“Welcome to my day boss.” Dave said, placing a hand on Carlos’ shoulder. 

“What do we even do with this?” Carlos asked, running a hand through his already ruffled hair. “Have you knocked on the door? Does anyone live there?”

“Why the hell would I knock on the door of a house that’s not there?” Dave exclaimed, stepping back past the line of the sidewalk.

“Hey, Stan!” Carlos called to the other scientists, still milling by the mail box.

“Yeah?” Stan called back, starting to walk over.

“Go knock on the door?” Carlos asked, jerking his head towards the house.

“Nuh-uh, no way boss.” Stan said, backing away from Carlos. “Why don’t you go do it?”

Carlos looked at the house and gulped, shaking his head slowly. “Nah, maybe tomorrow. Everyone up for pizza?” He asked, jogging back to his car amongst his team’s cheers as they all piled into the vehicles.

Carlos started his car just in time to hear Cecil’s sign off come from the radio. The scientist sighed, flushing slightly as he remembered the fond smile on Cecil’s face at the station.

“What am I going to do about him?” Carlos asked himself quietly, trailing behind the van carrying the rest of his team on the way back to the lab.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's 2:30 am and the last 1000 words or so haven't been proofread because my proofreader went to bed (like a sensible person) so I apologise for that, but hey, thanks for making it far enough to be reading this anyway. And hey, this is the last set-up chapter because now we've caught up to the end of Pilot so that's something.
> 
> So i know like nothing about radiation even though I spent an hour doing research and all I could come up with is that 50,000 cpm (counts per minute) is enough to cause sickness over long term exposure and that radiation is very scary.
> 
> I tried to include all this via implication but here's it explicitly stated for those who missed it or didnt understand for whatever reason:  
> Rochelle is a few years older than Carlos (and is a Chemist, though that's not mentioned at all in this so far)  
> Dave is a few years younger than Carlos and is a Geologist  
> Nilanjana is somewhere between 26 and 24, is a Biologist and is also Trans  
> Stan is somewhere between 20 and 23, freshly graduated with a degree in Physics or something  
> And Carlos is just a Scientist and somewhere around 30? or something? look idk im working off vagaries here.
> 
> kudos and comments are much appreciated, they keep me inspired to write  
> and if you want to talk to me about things like 'would a coffee mug actually count as a drinking glass for the purpose of getting the check at the Moonlight All-Nite Diner?' then check me out on [tumblr](http://lonelyboyinthelab.tumblr.com)  
> though i also have a twitter, where you can find me under @page_of_d  
> I don't know when the next chapter will be up because my family and I are moving in a few weeks so I don't know how much time I'll have for writing, but I'll try to get it done asap


	3. Week Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first week in Night Vale found Carlos and his team settling in nicely, especially after Carlos had read the information Big Rico had given him on his first day and was able to curb all of their apparently illegal activity.
> 
> The team’s pens and pencils had been willingly turned over to the Sheriff’s Secret Police officer, who was bunkered down in the lone tree behind the lab, and Carlos was only charged with a literal rap on the knuckles for letting the illegal behaviour happen under his supervision.
> 
> \--  
> The start of the team's second week in town.  
> The Glow Cloud shows up and Cecil and Carlos have lunch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off, sorry this took so long to get to y'all. In the past three weeks we've been packing up house and moving a three-days drive north-east-north so that took a lot of time. I also turned 20, which didn't take a lot of time, but is just a Thing that happened.  
> The next chapter should be faster to make happen, partially because !!! i got a copy of the script books for my birthday so I'll have Actual Physical Copies of the scripts which will make referencing things easier, but mainly because where we are at the moment means I have limited internet so I won't be wasting a bunch of time watching videos instead of writing.
> 
> Now, for this chapter i need to put some warnings here.  
> First up warnings for animal death a la Glow Cloud, and mentions of animal dissection (though it actually happens off screen cause i've never dissected something before)  
> next is a warning for some kinda graphic descriptions of menstrual cramps and blood like that stuff  
> (like bad ones)  
> so if that makes you uncomfy uhm  
> you can prolly skip over the worst of it tbh? like theres nothing plot heavy there, its more of a 'this is the sort fo shit Carlos deals w yknow?' kinda thing  
> but so if you skip from the ~~first timeskip~~ The Third timeskip (the oOo thing) to either 'Lower body all dried' that should skip over the worst of it.  
> (I'm sorry, i got that wrong, I'm sorry guys)  
> (if that doesn't catch all of it, someone please let me know.)
> 
> and this last one isnt so much a warning as it is a heads up  
> the last chunk is unbetaed cause i got impatient and wanted to upload this for all of you.  
> i will re-read it in the morning and as such it may get a slight revamping tomorrow, but im promising nothing cause i may end up declaring it 'good enough'
> 
> Now all of that's done, here's the chapter. Enjoy it.
> 
>  **Edit:** I read over the ending and made a few small changes just to make things fit together a little more smoothly. Thank you for bearing with me

 

The first week in Night Vale found Carlos and his team settling in nicely, especially after Carlos had read the information Big Rico had given him on his first day and was able to curb all of their apparently illegal activity.

The team’s pens and pencils had been willingly turned over to the Sheriff’s Secret Police officer, who was bunkered down in the lone tree behind the lab, and Carlos was only charged with a literal rap on the knuckles for letting the illegal behaviour happen under his supervision.

The communal Bloodstone circle issue was a breeze to fix, only taking a quick trip to the Bloodstone factory on the outskirts of town past the radio station and a few minutes to lay the stones out in their proper places. The circle got set up in the corner of the first floor, nestled into the Spiderwolf pelt Nilanjana had insisted on purchasing, and over the week the whole team made a joint effort to learn the basic, council mandated chants so any, or all, of them could perform them perfectly as needed.

The rest of the team’s week was spent on general lab set up, boxes of beakers and test tubes getting unpacked and stored away, bunsen burners being put through safety tests to make sure they weren’t too damaged to be used and microscopes spread out throughout the first and second floors. Stan and Rochelle went to Home Depot one day to buy some sturdy tables while Dave and Nilanjana went grocery shopping, since their fridge had shown up with no warning that morning, and Carlos was left up to his elbows in goat’s blood, working on painting the security sigils that Big Rico had recommended around the doors and windows.

That night they’d sat around the new lab tables, feet kicked up and slowly warming bottles of beer in most hands around the loose circle as they all relaxed and revelled their tidy lab space.

“The sigils look good.” Dave offered, breaking the sleepy silence that had settled over the team.

Carlos nodded in appreciation, sipping at his beer slowly. “I got Big Rico to come check them, he said they were better than even his kid could do.”

“Oooh nice boss!” Nilanjana said, smiling warmly. “That’s what, fourth-grade level?”

Over the week the scientists had spent a lot of time eating at Big Rico’s, leading to a level of familiarity with the man’s family, including his 11-year old daughter who had been a great help in learning the council mandated bloodstone chants.

“Apparently. What can I say?” Carlos gave a shrug, pushing his empty bottle onto the bench beside his feet. “I’m a fast learner.” The other scientists nodded sincerely as Carlos swung his legs off the table and stood up. “We start proper work in the morning, so try not to be up too late.” He said, grabbing his empty bottle and taking it over to the recycling box by the front door.

“Late isn’t a real concept!” Stan argued jokingly, waving at the sun, stubbornly present despite the 10pm Carlos’ phone, the device they’d worked out to be most accurate, had shown when they’d last bothered to check the time.

“Stan,” Carlos sighed, stifling a laugh with his hand. “Go to bed man, clearly it’s already too late for you.” Stan huffed and whined but pulled himself upright, trailing behind Carlos as he waved at the rest of the team and started up the stairs leading to bed.

The journey upstairs was mostly silent, the soft chatter from the others the only real background noise other than Stan’s occasional stumbles or yawns. When they reached the top floor Carlos put his hand on Stan’s shoulder, stopping the younger and spinning him around so they were facing each other.

“Stan, you really have to get some solid sleep. You’ve run yourself into the ground this week.” Carlos said softly, brow furrowing as he glanced up at the bags under Stan’s eyes. “Between helping set up the lab and working on that theory of yours…” Carlos sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “Look, don’t get me wrong, I’m glad you’re enjoying working on it, but I need you to be in top condition. We don’t know exactly how dangerous it can be here yet and I don’t want to lose anyone because they were over tired, okay?”

Stan nodded slowly, blinking blearily and yawning. “Sure thing boss, I’ll be fine to start work in the morning, I promise.” Stan patted at Carlos’ hand on his shoulder, giving the other a crooked smile and shuffling off towards his room.

“Goodnight, Stan.” Carlos called, chewing on his lip as he retreated to his own room.

Carlos kicked his shoes off by the door, pushing it closed with his toes and flicking the radio on his desk on in time to hear the start of a repeat of Cecil’s show. Carlos let the radio host’s voice wash over him as he locked his door and meandered over to his bathroom, shrugging out of the lab coat he’d worn to keep the goat’s blood off his clothes while painting the security sigils.

Carlos hung his lab coat on the bathroom door handle and flicked the bathroom light on, stepping over to start the shower before getting undressed. He unbuttoned his shirt and eased the rolled-up sleeves down his arms, trying to avoid getting flakes of blood, left over from his quick pre-dinner wash up, on his shirt as he threw it aside. Carlos tugged his binder off and sighed as a shower of dried blood shook off his arms as it slid down them before it was discarded, the pale elastic rolling up in itself when it landed. Carlos dropped his jeans and boxers quickly, barely pausing to kick them away from the shower before climbing in, ducking into the water and then cursing and fumbling for the cold tap when it was too hot.

When the water had been adjusted to a comfortable temperature Carlos stood under it and let it wash over him slowly. He carefully didn’t think about the way the water ran out and over his chest or the way it flowed over his hips in the same way one didn’t think about the dog park. He forced the intrusive thoughts to the back of his mind and instead thought about Stan, how focussed the kid was on his work; and Cecil, the dedicated radio host who had dutifully passed on every important message from the scientists; and just how long and very in need of a haircut his curls were. Carlos hummed to himself as he thought and scrubbed at his arms, eyes closed to the bloodstained water washing down the drain as he used his shower puff to scrape the blood from where it had settled in.

When Carlos’ forearms were a different kind of bright red and his hair was clean, though plastered to his neck and shoulders, he deemed it time to get out, but not before a quick wash down of the parts of his body that made a weight sit heavy in his gut. With his washing done Carlos stepped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around his body and using another to twist his hair up to dry.

Carlos stepped out of his bathroom and made his way to the desk in the corner of his room, where his clothes were stacked in neat piles amongst the clutter of half-empty coffee cups and frantically scribbled notes. He pulled out a pair of boxers and stepped into them before unwrapping his towel and letting it drop to the floor while picking a shirt from its pile and wrestling it on over the towel containing his hair. Carlos sighed as he shook his hair out of the towel, blowing runaway strands out of his face as he picked up his other towel and took them both to the bathroom to be hung up. He took a moment to brush his hair, frowning as his curls hung limp and some stuck to his jaw and neck, and brush his teeth before returning to his room in time to hear Cecil switch over to the Weather.

Carlos scooped up a notepad and a stub of a pencil, one he’d forgotten about until it had fallen out of one of his lab coat pockets earlier that day, on his way to his bed and flopped down onto the rumpled sheet, worming his way under them and tucking his pillow under his chest so he could still write. Carlos started by reading through the notes already in the notebook, mainly about the house in the Desert Creek development that didn’t exist, but also briefly about the Dog Park (don’t think, don’t look, don’t ask) and Cecil’s weather reports (do the songs actually indicate the weather?) before flipping to a fresh page to start a ‘to investigate’ list.

Carlos started the list with the Desert Creek house, continued it with the unfeelable earthquakes, the radio’s weather, the sunsets and time in general, the Dog Park (which was crossed out so quickly Carlos tore a hole in the page) and finished with just Cecil, written in full caps with three question marks and underlined. Carlos let out a low groan and lowered his face into his pillow, dropping his notepad and pencil stub as the weather faded out and Cecil came back on, already talking about Carlos and his ‘beautiful hair and pristine lab coat’ paired with a quote from Big Rico about how he and his team were settling in.

“Big Rico said he was especially impressed with just how eager to learn the scientists are. ‘They listen so well, even to my little girl.’” Cecil paused to clear his throat, having added a gravelly tone to his voice to emulate Big Rico’s. “‘They _encouraged_ her to teach them the council Bloodstone chants, y’know’ he said, wiping his hands on his apron and handing me my weekly slice. ‘And in return they taught her about some of the equipment they’re gonna be using. Lemme tell ya Cecil,’ Big Rico continued, ‘her science grade has improved so much already. It’ll do her good to have the scientists here. I can feel it. It’ll do all of us good.’” There was a brief rustle of paper and a small gulp, as if Cecil had discarded a page of notes and taken a sip of water or coffee before finishing the report. “And let _me_ tell _you_ , dear listeners, I could not agree more. These scientists will be nothing less than a valuable asset to our community, not just as Scientists, but also as everyday people that we can all learn to love and appreciate and accept as some of our own.”

Carlos sighed and smiled fondly at the radio, gathering his notepad and pencil and tucking them into the top drawer of his bedside table before settling into a more comfortable position in bed and watching the finally-setting sun as it slid down the horizon.

“...and remember, dear listeners,” Cecil’s voice flowed from the radio, smoothing over Carlos like an extra blanket as the temperature plummeted with the sun. “Fear of the unknown will only bring you an acquaintance with the sort-of known, a familiarity with the half-known and an uncomfortable over-friendliness with the known. Good night, Night Vale. Good night.” Carlos yawned as Cecil signed off, a smile evident in his voice as the station started playing three hours of classical music played at a third of its original speed.

Carlos blinked slowly as the warped strains of a song filtered their way into his ears, his brain still making notes and building a list of what to start on the next day.

The low, dragging notes of the song wormed their way over to Carlos, the discordant groaning of a violin disrupting his thoughts, cutting them off half-formed and leaving their ends to drift away and be replaced by the damaged music. His interrupted thoughts no longer keeping him awake, Carlos finally drifted off to sleep, sighing against his pillow and missing the start of the piano melody.

oOo

“Wake up boss! It’s Science Day!” Nilanjana called through Carlos’ bedroom, hammering on the door loudly and laughing as her boss startled awake with a wordless cry. “Come on Carlos, Dave made coffee.” She called, hitting the door with her palm one more time before skipping off with a giggle and leaving Carlos to get ready for the day.

Carlos heaved himself upright with a groan, scrubbing a hand over his face as he yawned and stretched, feeling his ribs flex and creak as he did so. He rubbed at his side when one of his ribs twinged with pain, weighing the pros and cons of getting coffee before getting dressed.

When a decision had been reached, Carlos yawned again and climbed out of bed, shuffling to his bathroom door and grabbing yesterday’s lab coat off it, shrugging into it and continuing his shuffle towards the door to the main living space, already trying to sniff out the coffee.

Carlos blinked as he entered the main living space, the open room much brighter than his bedroom, and made a beeline to the blurry shape of the coffee pot which was sat on the bench across the room.

“Morning boss!” Dave called, appearing at the top of the stairs, his arms full of printouts with a laptop balanced precariously on top. “Rochelle poured you a coffee already, she said she left it by the sink.” Carlos nodded slowly, turning to face the sink and finding the one full cup hidden amongst its empty brethren. He extracted the mug from the others, cupping it in his hands and taking a deep gulp of its contents.

Carlos leaned back against the bench, lowering his mug with a soft gasp for breath before raising it again and gulping down the last of the coffee in it. He set the empty mug aside and crossed his arms over his chest, carefully tugging his lab coat closed as he did so.

“Those the seismograph readings?” He asked, nodding to the stack of papers Dave was sorting into smaller piles on the coffee table.

“Yeah. It’s like 3 years’ worth of data. It was just piled up in the monitoring station so I figured I should start by looking at this before getting to the more recent stuff.” Dave sighed, picking another group of printouts from the stack and flicking through them before placing them in an opening on the tabletop.

“Christ.” Carlos breathed, running a hand through his hair and cursing when his fingers got tangled.

“Go get dressed boss,” Dave laughed, waving Carlos away and standing slowly. “I’ll get another pot of coffee going and you can deliver some downstairs to the others.”

Carlos yawned and nodded, pulling himself away from the bench and starting towards his room. “Thanks Dave.” He called over his shoulder as he reached his room and pushed the door closed with his hip.

Carlos attempted to dress quickly and efficiently, but instead he ended up hopping around with his hair brush caught in his curls while he tried to pull his jeans on single-handedly before he tripped and landed on his bed with a muted thud. Carlos sighed as he stared at the roof and carefully extracted his hair brush from his hair with a minimum amount of pulling.

“I’m getting a haircut. As soon as I have time. Honestly it’s been too long and I need one.” He said to himself, wriggling his way into his jeans and rolling himself off his bed, barely catching himself before he hit the ground and pushing himself upright.

Carlos stood and stretched slowly, crossing to his clothes piles and pulling out a tee and an over shirt, tugging them on and straightening them out until he looked decent enough. After a second attempt to detangle his hair with a brush Carlos gave up, instead wrestling it into a haphazard bun and promising himself he’d wash it and brush that evening, and maybe even try to get it cut first thing in the morning. Carlos’ glasses were shoved onto his face while his free hand grabbed a clean lab coat on the way out of his room again, shrugging it on while he was greeted by the smell of fresh coffee and a bright laugh.

“Nice style you got there, man.” Dave laughed as he poured the new coffee into the mugs of the scientists downstairs.

Carlos rolled his eyes and waved Dave’s comment away, even while he chuckled along and patted at the bumps of hair on top of his head. “I gave up on it. Can you tell?” Carlos asked jokingly, turning his head as if he was posing for a photo.

“You did? I wouldn’t have guessed!” Dave exclaimed with an exaggerated gasp that quickly dissolved into more laughter. “Maybe we should invite Cecil over. Show him just how imperfect your hair really is.” Dave commented as he finished filling the mugs and started adding sugar to the appropriate ones.

“Now there’s an idea.” Carlos said, blushing gently and getting the milk carton from the fridge. “I knew I was paying you for something.”

“Ha ha.” Dave replied, smiling at Carlos as he passed the tray of coffees over. “But really boss, if it bothers you, you should say something to him.” He placed a hand on Carlos’ shoulder and squeezed slightly. “We’re here to keep you safe from creeps like him, boss.”

“It’s just a little harmless infatuation. He’ll get over it, especially as he starts to see me more and the ‘perfect Carlos’ shine wears off.” Carlos shrugged, trying to keep his voice light and ignoring the twist in his chest at the thought of Cecil losing interest in him. “Besides, it’s not like I reciprocate the feelings or anything. I’m here to do Science, and Science is what I will do.” Carlos said, as much to himself as to Dave.

Dave clearly didn’t fully buy it, based on the raised eyebrow and concerned set of his mouth, but to his credit he didn’t try and fight Carlos on it. “Best get these to the others before they get cold.” Was all Dave said before getting back to his own work, leaving Carlos to heft up the dissection tray that was serving as their tea tray and carry it carefully downstairs.

Carlos stopped on the second floor by Stan, where he was sitting at one of the cubicles and scrawling in his note book with a lump of graphite, which they had discovered didn’t count as a writing utensil to the Sheriff’s Secret Police, and neither did non-stick shaped chalk or the soft-fibre ink compartments of whiteboard markers. Stan was occasionally pausing in his writing to examine the array of alarm clocks and watches that was spread out on the majority of the desk in front of him, all in various states of being dismantled and running his hands through his hair, making it stick up in all directions.

“How’s it going, Stan?” Carlos asked as he passed, startling the younger scientist into yelping.

“Oh, oh sorry boss.” Stan stammered, a hand pressed to his chest as he calmed down. “But uh, yeah, it’s going….” Stan paused and looked at the mess on the desk in front of him and sighed heavily. “It’s going.”

Carlos shifted his hold on the tray of coffees to pat Stan’s shoulder. “You’ll get there.” They shared a moment of silence before the tray started wobbling in Carlos’ hand and he had to briefly set it down on the next desk over before he dropped it.

“Oh, here.” Carlos said, remembering the original reason he’d been on his way down. “Dave made more coffee.” He extracted Stan’s cup from the others and passed it to him.

“Oh thank God, just what I needed.” Stan sighed happily, sipping at it immediately.

“I should get the rest of these to the others.” Carlos said, looking over the steaming mugs still on the tray. “Why don’t you come down when you finish that? I want to hold a team meeting, just to make sure we’re all on the same page here.”

Stan nodded as Carlos picked up the tray again and started towards the stairs down. “Sure thing boss. I’ll get Dave too, shall I?”

“That would be great Stan, thank you!” Carlos called with a grin as he made his way down the stairs, careful not to jolt the mugs so much they’d spill.

“Coffee you two!” Carlos called as he stepped off the bottom step and wound his way past the assorted machinery to the centre lab bench where he set the tray down and took his own cup to start sipping at.

“Ooh, more coffee?” Nilanjana chirped, bouncing on her heels as her gloved hands dripped something red into a glass bowl she and Rochelle were working over.

“Yup. But you should finish that up first.” Carlos said, waving at their work and the substance that looked like it was trying to escape from the bowl.

“Oh, shit!” Rochelle sprang into action, sprinkling a powder over the bowl’s contents and chanting lowly to it.

Carlos jumped up to sit on the bench next to the coffees, turning himself to watch Rochelle and Nils with interest.

“So, what’s all that?” He asked when Rochelle had the substance? Creature? Under control again.

“This is the grow your own bloodstone kit.” Nilanjana answered, shaking her head to flick her hair out of her face.

“It’s slightly more… hands-on than we were anticipating.” Rochelle added, leaning in to chant a few more things at the bowl before straightening and pulling her gloves off. “That needs to rest for a half hour now. Time for coffee.”

Carlos continued sipping at his coffee while the girls took their safety glasses off and washed their hands thoroughly, taking a moment to roll their stained lab coat sleeves up before they took their coffees.

“What exactly is in that?” Carlos asked while they sipped, craning his neck to try and get a better look in the bowl.

“Half the goats blood left over from yesterday, 30 mils of Nils’ blood and about 2 cups of powdered bloodstone.” Rochelle said simply, shrugging and taking a gulp of coffee.

Carlos had to fight back a spit-take and ended up half-choking on his mouthful of coffee instead, folding over himself and coughing in a desperate fight for air.

“Also you shouldn’t try to look at it too much, it doesn’t really like it.” Nilanjana added, bouncing a little and setting her empty mug in the tray. “It’s actually really fascinating, it behaves much like a simple animal even though it logically shouldn’t!”

“Are you okay boss?” Rochelle asked, reaching around to give Carlos’ back a firm slap.

“You put your _blood_ into that?” He gasped eventually, still coughing amongst trying to sip his coffee to fix the problem.

“Well yeah. The instructions said to.” Nilanjana countered, rolling her eyes. “It’s okay though, there were instructions for an anti-possession chant which we did first.”

Carlos nodded, throat still feeling tight and ticklish and cheeks red from a lack of breath.

“We even asked Big Rico first and he checked the chants and made sure they were the right ones. He said his daughter did one of these last year but she got the containment chant wrong and they had to replace their carpet because it became sentient.” Nilanjana continued, quieting down to mutter to herself about the sentient goop in the bowl and reaching for one of their chalkboards and a lump of chalk they’d made.

Carlos sighed heavily and went to drag a hand through his hair only to end up awkwardly running his hand over the mess he’d made of his hair instead. “As long as you’re taking the right precautions. I don’t want to lose a team member so early on.” He conceded, taking a cautious sip of his coffee and drinking more deeply when it went down smoothly.

“Of course we’ll take the right precautions.” Nilanjana and Rochelle said in unison.

“We’re not little kids Carlos, we _can_ take care of ourselves.” Nils continued, huffing softly and nearly pouting at Carlos.

“I know you can.” Carlos said, sighing softly and reaching out to touch Nilanjana’s arm softly. “I also know, though, that this town is very different to what we thought it was.”

Nilanjana softened immediately and nodded, leaning into Carlos’ touch slightly.

“I’m just trying to be a good team leader.” Carlos murmured, taking his hand off Nils and tucking it into his lap.

“You’re a great leader, boss.” Stan called from the floor above, grinning at the way the three on the lower floor jumped.

“Christ Stan.” Carlos called up. “Get Dave and come down will you? Might as well have the team meeting while Nils and Rochelle are free.”

“Sure thing Carlos.” Stan grinned and saluted, disappearing from sight.

“Team meeting?” Rochelle asked, setting her empty mug on the bench in front of herself and tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear.

“To make sure we’re all on the same page, and to see if there’s anything else anyone needs that we don’t have yet.” Carlos explained, wriggling further onto the bench and pulling his legs up to sit cross-legged.

Nilanjana made a noise of agreement as she pulled herself up to sit on the next bench across and rearranged her skirt over her legs. “Makes sense. I don’t need anything _immediately_ ,” she said, swinging her legs and leaving the implied ‘but’ hanging in the air.

“…but…?” Carlos asked after a few moments of expectant silence.

“A proper pickup would be nice. Something with a nice big bed to carry samples back in!” Nilanjana burst out, using her hands to sketch out a shape in the air. “I’m sure Dave would appreciate it too!”

Carlos hummed thoughtfully, doing some mental addition and carrying numbers. “I’ll see what I can do.” He said, tapping a thoughtless rhythm on his knee with his fingers. “It won’t be a new one, but I’ll look into second hand ones.”

“Thank you boss!” Nils cheered, doing a little dance that made both Rochelle and Carlos laugh.

“Anything you need Rochelle?” Carlos asked, turning his head slightly towards the sound of Dave and Stan coming down the stairs. “Or either of you two?”

“Something to label beakers with.” Rochelle said. “The inner ink things might work for whiteboards, but I can’t label anything properly with them.” She huffed, blowing her fringe out of her face.

“Would a label maker work?” Carlos asked, scratching an itch on his neck idly.

“As long as the labels aren’t too big it should.” Rochelle nodded, tapping her fingers on the bench top.

“I’ll see what I can find.” Carlos nodded, turning properly to face Dave and Stan.

“I need clocks. Just about any kind, as many as you can get.” Stan said instantly, his brow furrowed and lip slowly getting dragged back between his teeth.

“Tupperware containers. Or something like that. Watertight preferably.” Dave added, hooking a stool with his foot and settling himself on it.

“Clocks and watertight containers it is.” Carlos said, closing his eyes for a moment to commit the list to memory. “Okay so now I want to get a list started of our priorities. Someone pass me a whiteboard and an ink thing.” Carlos held his hands out and was handed one of the smaller whiteboards lying around the lab by Dave and a magenta ink insert by Nilanjana. “So far we’ve noticed temporal, geographical and seismological phenomena.” Carlos started, looking around his team for their confirming nods. “As well as what appear to be visual hallucinations.” Another pause, another round of nods. “Stan, you’re working on the time phenomenon, right?” Carlos turned to face Stan fully, placing the whiteboard across his knees and preparing to write.

“I am. I’m close to something, not sure what yet, I need more clocks and more,” Stan broke with a sharp laugh, shaking his head. “I need more clocks and more _time_.”

Carlos nodded and started to make a note of it. “Stan, time, in progress.” He said slowly as he wrote, only to freeze and blink at the big ‘Science!!’ that was written in an unfamiliar handwriting instead. “Uhm.”

“Don’t worry, happened to me too. Just the once, like a calibration thing.” Nilanjana said, looking over Carlos’ shoulder. “Try starting the list again.”

Carlos dragged his sleeve over the whiteboard to clear it, and tried writing his point again, barely surprised when it worked the second time around.

“Okay. That’s something else to look at, but not immediately.” Carlos sighed and squirmed around to face Dave. “Dave. Earthquakes.”

“I’ve been collating the highest peaks from the last three years with the newspapers from those dates and there’s been nothing. No observable effects of these peaks. I don’t really trust the seismographs, but we can’t do anything to replace them, so I want to do some basic experiments, containers of water around the place, see if they shake, stuff like that.” Dave rattled off, gesturing with his hands and furrowing his brow every other word.

“Sounds good, keep on that, let me know if anything at all turns up.” Carlos said, noting it on the whiteboard in the same way he’d done Stan’s work. “Rochelle, Nils. Just the bloodstones so far?”

“Pretty much.” Nilanjana said, tucking her hands into her lab coat pockets. “This will take us at least the rest of the day, then we’ll want Dave to take a look at them and maybe make an educational visit to the Bloodstone factory.” She continued, all business as Rochelle nodded along beside her.

“And when that’s done what’s your plan?” Carlos asked, noting down the bloodstone tests.

“I want to get samples of some of the flora and fauna here, especially after the radiation readings you’ve been getting. There’s no way anything should be alive here.” Nilanjana answered, kicking her legs in the air.

Carlos nodded and turned to Rochelle. “And you?”

“Kinda the same really, just looking more at the water to start with, maybe some air samples.” Rochelle said, chewing on the corner of her thumb and humming softly. “I might do some preliminary investigation into the imaginary corn crops.” She added, nodding at Nilanjana. “Nils can help me if she has time.”

Carlos nodded and wrote on the whiteboard. “That sounds like a great idea guys.” He finished the addition to the list and looked around everyone with a grin. “I’m glad to see you all have plans and ideas already, and that you’re working on them. While I am team leader I do want you all to have freedom in what you do, what experiments you run, what phenomenon you investigate, so this is a good start.” Carlos paused to take in everyone’s smiles. “Dave, could you pass me another whiteboard? Nils put this one on display somewhere.” He said, holding a hand out towards Dave and pushing his whiteboard off his knees towards Nilanjana.

Nilanjana took the whiteboard from Carlos and leaned it against one of the windows, adjusting the angle until the glare from the lab’s lights was at a minimum.

“So that’s what we’re currently working on. This one will have a list of what we should work on next.” Carlos said, starting to write on the new whiteboard Dave handed him and sighing when it started with another ‘Science!’, this time with hearts scrawled around it too. Carlos didn’t bother to erase it, just starting the list beneath it instead. “This ‘calibration’ phrase when writing notes would be good to explore sooner rather than later, but it’s not urgent. Rochelle can you pass me a different coloured ink?” Carlos set the magenta ink cartridge aside and held a hand out towards Rochelle to take the beige one being handed to him. “The house in the Desert Creek development should be explored, also the Radio’s weather reports. We should learn what they mean because we will need to be able to interpret them.” Carlos continued his list in the beige marker, starting a key on the side as to what the different colours meant. “Magenta items are ‘better to be solved sooner, but they can wait’ beige will be ‘not really urgent but kind of important’ and, Rochelle another colour please? Thanks. Olive will be ‘just don’t’.” Carlos said, taking the olive ink off Rochelle and writing ‘DOG PARK’ and immediately putting three neat lines through it. “Anything any of you want to add to the list?” Carlos asked, picking up the magenta ink again and adding ‘Arby’s lights’ to the bottom of the list.

“I heard a report on the radio the other day about an underground city? Under the bowling alley.” Stan offered. “That should probably be in magenta.” He added, nodding as Carlos wrote it down.

“Maybe we should go over and meet Old Woman Josie, apparently she has angels living with her?” Rochelle said, pushing the beige ink into Carlos’ hand.

“Though, of course, angels don’t exist.” Nilanjana added loudly, smiling as their Sheriff’s Secret Police surveillance officer retreated into their hideaway with a thankful wave.

“Sure thing.” Carlos said, nodding as he wrote ‘angels that don’t exist’ on the list. “We’ll keep this list going, feel free to add anything to it as you think of things.” Carlos said slowly, adding an extra point in beige that read ‘Cecil Palmer?’ where the dot at the bottom of the question mark was a tiny heart that Carlos didn’t even notice himself add. “Otherwise you can all go back to what you were doing before. I have some shopping to do anyway.” Carlos chuckled and smiled at his team, pushing himself towards the edge of the table and jumping off before going to set the whiteboard in his hands next to the other one.

The rest of the team dispersed, Dave and Stan disappearing upstairs again while Rochelle and Nilanjana unrolled their lab coat sleeves and pulled on clean pairs of gloves.

“Oh, have either of you heard of any hairdressers in town? I’m in desperate need of a haircut.” Carlos asked as he straightened the whiteboards.

“Oh, yeah I heard an ad for one on the radio yesterday! Telly’s barber in town. I don’t remember what street it’s on though, sorry.” Nilanjana said, tucking her hair behind her ears and sliding her safety glasses back on.

“I’ll keep an eye out for it today, or ask Big Rico. Thanks Nils, have fun with your bloodstones you two!” Carlos called, waving at the pair as he stepped out into the dry heat of outdoors.

oOo

Carlos blinked and found himself standing next to his car, a Target bag in one hand, his car keys in the other, and the radio playing the sounds of Cecil apologising for some technical difficulties they’d had before the weather, despite the car being turned off in all ways. Carlos rubbed at his eyes and hummed to himself, having no memory of actually having visited Target. He turned towards the lab, pausing at the sight of piles of dead animals lying across the street and the front lawns of the lab and the neighbouring buildings. There was a moose and several dog bodies lying in the Big Rico’s parking lot and, despite the fact that some of the bodies looked like they’d been there for hours now, the air was filled with the scent of vanilla.

Carlos scratched the back of his neck, accidentally scraping his keys against his skin as he considered the debris around him and searched his memory for an answer. He pulled his phone out of his pocket to check the time as he made his way to the lab’s door, humming thoughtfully at the claimed 1:40 and trying to remember anything about the missing hours of memory.

Carlos unlocked the lab door and stepped inside, pausing to carefully wipe his shoes on the door mat without thinking why and only being mildly surprised when he looked down to find a thin layer of blood coating the soles of his work boots.

Taking in the rest of the lab, however, caused a little more than mild surprise. All of the benches were covered in animal bodies, some whole, some half-dissected and a few fully-dissected, while a beaming Nilanjana skipped around the room making comments into a tape recorder Rochelle was holding for her.

“So we’ve fully dissected three samples and there’s nothing that could have made them die. No kind of heart or lung or other bodily organ issues that would indicate death. They all seem to have died of natural causes, despite the oldest sample barely being out of adolescence.” Nilanjana said, pausing to poke around inside an otter.

“This must be like a dream come true for you, huh Nils.” Carlos joked, stepping further into the lab and lying the Target bag on a tentatively clean section of lab bench. “But how’d it all happen? I have no memory from leaving here to getting back.”

Nilanjana and Rochelle frowned at Carlos, their faces full of concern as they crossed the room.

“No memory at all?” Rochelle asked, reaching out to tip Carlos’ chin up to look at his eyes. “Not a concussion or something? You weren’t hit by anything?”

“Not that I know of.” Carlos answered, fighting the urge to pull his chin out of Rochelle’s grip. “I mean I have vague memories of animals falling? Although that could be conjecture based off the animals lying in the streets all over the place.”

“Remember the radio ‘Chelle?” Nilanjana asked, side-eyeing the now-silent radio on the bench. “Maybe he got the amnesia too.”

“That would make sense. He was clearly more exposed than we were. Must be that.” Rochelle murmured, looking up at shouting for Stan. “Hey Stan, you still have those notes on the Glow Cloud?”

There was a muttered ‘all hail’ from the second floor before Stan’s head appeared over the railing. “Yeah, I have notes on the Glow Cloud. Why? Oh, hey boss.”

“Carlos doesn’t remember it, he might have got hit by the same amnesia as Cecil.” Nils called up, putting her hands on her hips.

“At least we have Stan’s notes about it. That should help.” Rochelle said, rucking the tape recorder into her lab coat pocket and pulling her gloves off. “Hey,” she continued, calling up to Stan. “Can you bring your notes down and then go check on Dave?”

Stan nodded and disappeared from sight, reappearing moments later at the bottom of the stairs with his notebook in his hands. “They’re not super legible… I was kind of more focussed on observing than writing at the time.” Stan said, passing the book over with a frown.

“We’ll work it out. Go get Dave.” Rochelle said, taking the notebook and flipping it open to a marked page.

“So… what happened?” Carlos asked, rubbing at his forehead in confusion.

“The Glow Cloud happened.” Nilanjana said, waving at one of the chalkboards, previously empty but now containing three different ‘Science!’ scrawls and three different handwritings of ‘All Hail The Glow Cloud’. “It was this cloud that glowed. All different colours. It passed over town about an hour ago? Just when we were starting to wonder how much longer you’d be.” Nils continued, glancing over Rochelle’s shoulder at the scrawl of Stan’s notes. “It started raining dead animals everywhere, temporarily possessed Cecil and then left us all this mess to clean up.”

“Wait, it temporarily possessed Cecil?” Carlos asked, stubbornly ignoring the flush he could feel as Nilanjana grinned at him cheekily.

“Worried about him are we?” She teased, laughing as Carlos swatted at her arm. “But yeah, he went all ‘All Hail The Glow Cloud’ for a bit and then cut to the weather. When he came back he was normal again but he said he had no memory of it and that their tapes were blank.”

“Interesting. Do you think the possession and the amnesia are related? Maybe I was temporarily possessed too.” Carlos hummed, turning to Rochelle who had pulled a chalkboard over and was transcribing from Stan’s notes onto it. “You getting much from them?” He asked, gesturing to Stan’s notebook.

“Yeah, I’m getting some stuff. Some parts are harder to read than others though.” She said, squinting at a page before adding another note to the chalkboard.

“There’s a chance the possession and the amnesia are connected, but Cecil remembered much more than you did afterwards.” Nilanjana mused, stroking her chin and smearing blood on her skin.

“Maybe he’s been possessed more? I’m sure I’ve never been possessed before, but it seems like something that would be a common occurrence here.” Carlos said, tugging on the hair tie restraining his hair and letting it out.

“Possessions happen all the time here, heck their newspaper has a section in the classifieds dedicated to it.” Dave said from the second storey, on his way down with Stan. “But there’s nothing I’ve found that suggests any side effects from multiple possessions.”

Carlos nodded and hummed, idly spinning the hair tie around in his fingers. “Maybe we should look into that. And anti-possession protections.”

“Could be an idea.” Dave said, nodding. “I’ve read some… mildly terrifying stories in the papers. But anyway, why are we talking about possession?”

“We think Carlos may have been possessed by the Glow Cloud.” Rochelle said, snapping Stan’s notebook shut and passing it back to the other. “Thanks for that.”

“Well the only other person we know was possessed by the Glow Cloud was Cecil, so we should probably talk to him.” Dave said, leaning against a lab bench with his hands in his pockets while the others took in the notes Rochelle had salvaged from Stan’s scribbles.

Carlos’ eyes skimmed the chalkboard and he sighed, turning away from it to face Dave. “I suppose that makes sense. Also thank you, Stan and Rochelle, for summarising the Glow Cloud.”

“Do you,” Dave hesitated, ran a hand through his hair and sighed. “Would you like one of us to talk to him about it?”

Carlos chewed on his lip and played with the ends of his lab coat sleeves. “No,” he sighed. “I’ll do it. I can also talk to him about talking about me on the radio.”

The others frowned but no one argued with Carlos, Dave nodded slowly and straightened to pat Carlos’ shoulder. “We’ll be just a phone call away if you need it.”

“Thanks.” Carlos smiled gratefully at his team. “Now,” Carlos clapped, shifting back into work mode. “We need to get this all cleaned up and, if you want to keep these Nils, you’re gonna have to store them properly. I’m going to contact Cecil and set up a meeting while you sort yourselves out.”

The team groaned collectively as Carlos stepped out the front door, laughing at their protests as he dug his phone out of his pocket and pulled up his text conversation with Cecil. He started the discussion with a generic ‘This is not for personal reasons. I need to ask you some questions. Can we meet sometime tomorrow?’ and then stood on the lab’s front step and rubbed at his aching stomach while he waited for a response.

oOo

Carlos woke curled in on himself and making vaguely pained noises into his pillow. He whined to himself as he clawed his way out of bed, desperately trying to ignore the aching in his guts and the dampness in his boxers as he made his way to his bathroom in search of painkillers. He rummaged through the cabinet he’d unpacked his toiletries into, thanking every God he could name when he found the box of fast-acting ibuprofen he had there.

With shaking hands Carlos pulled the box open and tugged out the foil tray, only to drop it with a frustrated groan when he realised it was empty.

“God damn it. God fucking Damn it.” He cursed, bending almost double over the sink and dry-heaving into it. Carlos panted and held onto the sink for dear life, his knees shaking and not quite holding his weight properly. He stayed bent over the sink, riding out the wave of pain until he felt stable enough that he could move again and, when he did, he slowly made his way back to his room to grab a lab coat to drape around his shoulders as he went in search of painkillers elsewhere in the lab.

Carlos pulled his door open and paused in the doorway, leaning on it while he tried to work out who was in the room, the two figures too far away for him to be able to see them properly with the way everyone wore lab coats around.

“Carlos, are you okay?” Rochelle’s voice asked as one of the people came towards him, arms out to help. As she got closer, Rochelle’s concerned featured came into focus and Carlos subconsciously leaned into her as she hooked an arm under his.

“Do you have painkillers? Any kind, something fast acting?” He asked breathlessly, clutching at his stomach as she led him over to the couch, only hesitating when she made to lower him onto the cushions.

“Carlos you can’t stand on your own, I need you to sit down so I can get something to help.” Rochelle said, aiming for stern but missing the mark and sounding worried instead.

“I uh,” Carlos paused, chewing his lip and eyeing the other, as yet unidentified, figure in the room. “I shouldn’t… If I sit down I’ll uhm.” Carlos’ cheeks flushed as his words failed, stuttering to a silence as he vaguely waved his hand around. “I’ll stain the cushions.” He said firmly, looking at his toes and avoiding Rochelle’s understanding dawning on her face.

“Oh, God, I’m sorry Carlos. Uh, Nils? I’ve got some Panadol in my backpack, can you go get it for us?” Rochelle asked and Carlos sighed softly, glad it was Nilanjana and not Dave or Stan in the room with them.

“Sure thing.” Nils said, brushing a gently hand across Carlos’ back as she passed.

“Thank you, Rochelle.” Carlos said softly, trailing off into a low moan as another strong wave of pain hit him in the stomach.

“Anything I can do to help.” She replied, just as softly and he could hear the sweet smile in her voice as Nilanjana came back amid the sound of bursting foil and pills tapping against each other.

“Here, I’ll get you some water.” She said, tugging Carlos’ balled fist open to drop the pills into his palm.

Carlos focussed on breathing and not dry-heaving against the carpet while he heard a glass being filled with water and Nilanjana all but running to get it to him.

“Here. Take those and maybe get in the shower.” She said, holding the glass for him while he tipped the pills into his mouth. “Should we call Cecil? Tell him Carlos won’t make it?” Nilanjana asked Rochelle softly while Carlos swallowed the pills and gulped the water down after them.

“I don’t know. There’s still time until they have to meet, we can wait and see how he’s feeling later.” Rochelle answered, stroking a thumb along the dip between Carlos’ shoulder blades as he slumped against her shoulder.

“I’ll be fine.” Carlos said, passing the empty glass back to Nilanjana and pulling some of his weight off Rochelle and onto his still-shaky knees. “The first few hours are the worst. I’ll be fine by 12.” He said, sounding confident and assured despite the way he occasionally lurched towards Rochelle for support and clutched at his stomach almost constantly. “I just need time and a shower.” He nodded to himself, and then to Rochelle and Nilanjana, smiling at them in thanks as he shuffled towards his room, taking a circuitous path that gave him things to lean on if he needed it.

He could feel both Rochelle and Nilanjana’s concerned gazes on his back but he stubbornly ignored them until he made it to his room, only having to stop once and double over, a hand clamped over his mouth to keep himself from heaving. He closed his door and leaned back against it, trying not to slide down it and sit there and cry, fighting the burning in his eyes and the quivering of his lower lip. He let himself wallow in self-pity for a moment before he shook himself and forced himself into the bathroom, dropping his lab coat and stripping his shirt off before stepping into the shower and turning the water on, still in his boxers as he stood under the cold water and shivered while he waited for it to warm up.

Carlos watched the bloodstained water wash off his boxers and swirl down the drain, trying not to think too hard about it and hurl, but unable to ignore it. Eventually he pushed his boxers down and kicked them into the corner, where they’d stay until he did laundry, and started the tedious process of cleaning all the blood away. It was a process that took a lot of blank staring at a wall and not thinking about where his fingers were touching and ignoring the globs of blood that would sometimes cling to his fingers until he held them directly under the shower’s spray, close to the shower head so the force of the water would push them all the way off his fingers.

The water was almost back to running ice cold by the time Carlos felt clean enough to get out, turning the water off and rushing to his towel to dry himself off before the blood could build up too much again. He’d learned the hard way how difficult it could be to get blood out of towels.

Lower body all dried and hair twisted up in a towel and out of the way, Carlos shuffled into his bedroom and dressed slowly, making sure everything was put on carefully to avoid any chance of leaking blood during the day. Carlos sat on his bed as he pulled his binder on, waiting out a wave of pain, not as bad as earlier but bad enough that it got past the painkillers, and trying to resist the urge to just crawl back into bed and not emerge for the next week.

Carlos allowed himself a moment to let out a dry sob as he mentally cursed everything that he had to deal with this, now of all times, before he shook himself and stood, adjusting his binder and pulling a plain shirt on. He made a few more adjustments and let his hair out of the towel to brush it out, carefully detangling the knots and letting the process guide his mind to a serene blankness that he could use to start the day properly. He tied his hair up in a bun again, a neater one than yesterday’s, and tugged on a plaid over shirt, buttoning all but the top two buttons and straightening the collar before sliding a lab coat on over it.

Carlos slid his glasses on last before he took a deep breath and fixed a smile on his face as he stepped out of his room again.

“You feeling better?” Rochelle asked, jumping up from her seat on the couch to hover anxiously.

“Sure am.” Carlos said, trying to make it sound like he wasn’t lying and he didn’t want to bury himself under the Sheriff’s Secret Police observation tree.

“We can still call Cecil and rearrange your meeting you know.” She said, trailing behind Carlos as he started making himself a strong cup of tea.

“I promise you Rochelle, I’m fine.” Carlos said, putting the kettle on to boil and turning to face his worried co-worker. “I wasn’t before, very much so, but that’s because I wasn’t prepared. I am now and I am okay.” Carlos rested his hands on Rochelle’s shoulders and stretched up a little to make proper eye contact with her. “Thank you, though. Your concern means a lot to me.” Carlos dropped his hands and attempted a reassuring smile as he turned back to make his tea.

He heard Rochelle give a soft sigh, and felt her pat his back and move away while he held onto the bench and tried not to cry. The kettle ticked off, the water boiled, and Carlos opened the cupboard above him, grabbing the first thing that felt like a mug, pulling it out and filling it with the hot water. It was only when he was putting a tea bag into it that he realised it wasn’t a mug but one of the insulated beakers he used instead of mugs in grad school. He laughed as he steeped his tea, stirring in two spoonfuls of sugar as he kept laughing, finding it better than the alternative of breaking down much like he had his first morning in Night Vale.

Carlos finished his tea with a splash of milk and carried the warm beaker with him as he collected his phone and a pair of socks from his room, tucking each into his lab coat pocket, and then downstairs to the main lab. Based on the time on his phone, and the math he’d done when making plans with Cecil, he still had 2 hours before they were due to meet, so Carlos figured he might as well go find Telly’s barber shop and get a haircut while he had time.

Carlos set himself up on a bench in the corner of the first floor lab space, earphones playing a recording of yesterday’s radio show while he sipped at his tea and slid his feet into his socks and work boots, occasionally pausing in his actions to scrawl a note or question to ask Cecil with his stubby pencil into his notebook. His team worked mostly silently and tried not to disturb him for the most part, leaving him to his tea and notes and, when he was ready to leave, they muttered soft goodbyes and smiled encouragingly.

“Remember, if you need us we’re just a phone call away.” Dave said, smiling and patting Carlos’ shoulder in a way that made Carlos wonder what Rochelle and Nilanjana had told him and Stan. It almost felt like he was being treated with kid gloves, but he didn’t have time to ask immediately, it would have to wait.

“Thanks.” He said instead, nodding to his team and leaving the lab, climbing into his car and rolling slowly into town, the windows down and his phone playing an assortment of the songs that Cecil had used for the weather in the week Carlos and his team had been in town and recording the radio show.

oOo

As it turned out, Telly’s Barbershop was relatively easy to find, with it being in the main stretch of the strip mall in town with the Moonlight All-Nite, where Carlos was meeting Cecil, just a few blocks down the road.

Carlos had taken his hair out of its bun on the drive, letting it air-dry into a mess of frizz and a handful of ringlets that he most definitely planned on getting cut as short as possible. It was only practical, both for science and for living in a desert.

There was a bell on the door of Telly’s that jingled when Carlos pushed it open, and a portly, moustached man bustled out of the back store rooms, greeting Carlos with a wide grin and a loud “Mr Scientist! I’m honoured to have you in my store! What can I help you with today?”

When Carlos described what he wanted Telly clapped his hands together and grinned, if possible, even more broadly. “Of course, of course! Right here sir!” Telly boomed, pointing Carlos to one of the two chairs in the small store and sweeping a paisley print barbers cape over him when he sat. “If I may, I’ll just take these off, they’ll be just here on the counter.” Telly said, gently pulling Carlos’ glasses off his face and folding the arms in to lay them, lenses up, on the counter. “Also, if I may just comment, your hair is so lovely Mr Scientist, it’s such a shame to cut it all off like this.” Telly prattled on, fitting an attachment to his clippers and gently tipping Carlos’ head forwards.

“Yes, well. It’s just a lot more practical to keep it short.” Carlos muttered into his chest, feeling the clipper’s buzz reverberate through his skull as Telly moved around him methodically and buzzed his hair off.

“In a desert I should say so! But even so,” Telly said, turning the clippers off and reaching for a spray bottle and a pair of scissors. “Such silky hair, even with this slight touch of grey, no, no it’s not bad at all, gives you an air of authority if I do say so.” Telly continued, bustling around Carlos alternatively spraying and cutting his hair as he went.

“It’s premature. My mother’s hair did the same.” Carlos said as Telly whipped the barber’s cape off him and dusted the back of his neck with a brush.

“There we are, much better suited to this heat Mr Scientist!” Telly said as he folded the cape and tidied his tools. “And here are your glasses.” Carlos took his glasses from the barber’s hand, cringing as he saw the way Telly had closed his palm over the lenses and left smears all over the glass.

“Yes, thank you.” Carlos said as he tried to clean his glasses on the hem of his shirt while making it look like it was a precaution, not like he thought Telly had left smudges even though he knew he had. “How much do I owe you?” Carlos slid his glasses onto his face and cringed at the smears but tried to ignore them temporarily so he could pay.

“For you Mr Scientist? On the house! Now have a good day!” Telly said, slapping Carlos’ shoulder and making his way back to the back rooms, leaving Carlos bewildered and stepping back into the desert heat, feeling much cooler now he didn’t have masses of hair on his head.

Carlos headed back to his car, climbing into the heated air and turning on the engine to blast the air conditioning while he dug around for a tissue to clean his glasses. The radio had flicked on with the air conditioning and while he cleaned his glasses Carlos sank into his seat and listened to the tinny elevator music playing from the speakers, including the occasional sound of people getting on and off or coughing into their hand. Carlos slid his now-clean glasses onto his face and took a moment to massage his stomach, where his pains were starting to come back as the painkillers wore off, before starting his car fully and driving the short distance to the Moonlight All-Nite. He pulled into the parking lot and slumped forwards in his seat to rest his head against the steering wheel as he mentally prepared himself for Cecil.

He still had time to spare but spending that time waiting in the car wasn’t a good idea, so Carlos climbed out and made sure to lock it before heading inside and claiming a booth for himself and Cecil, when the radio host arrived.

A waitress bustled over quickly, the branches sprouting from her sagging with ripe fruits, to ask what Carlos wanted, but she left quickly with a promise of coffee when he told her he was waiting on someone.

Carlos tried not to fidget as he waited, tried not to curl into a ball like he so desperately wanted to, tried not to let his discomfort show on his face while people entered and exited the diner, were served food and drinks by other waiters and waitresses, each of them with branches laden with fruit. None of the people were Cecil, and the longer Carlos sat in the booth waiting, the more uncomfortable he became until he started shooting looks at the bathroom every few minutes, considering running into it so he could spend a few minutes curled into a ball without people questioning it.

He was just starting to slide out of the booth to go sit in the bathroom when Cecil walked in, greeting the waiters and waitresses brightly and then freezing and gaping when he laid eyes on Carlos.

“C-Carlos,” he all but whined, lowering himself slowly into the booth with despair written all over his face. “What happened to your wonderful hair?” Cecil moaned, reaching out to touch some of the half-curls atop Carlos’ head and trailing his fingers down the scientist’s temple.

“I-I needed to get it cut Cecil, it was a hazard and, uhm, and besides, it’s far too hot here to have long hair.” Carlos stammered, freezing in place himself as Cecil stroked through his now-short hair, bemoaning its new length.

“But _Carlos-_ ” Cecil choked, running his hand down to cup Carlos’ cheek, either ignoring or not noticing the way the other stiffened even further. “It was gorgeous.” Cecil’s thumb stroked along Carlos’ cheekbone and his hand dropped away, landing on one of Carlos’.

“Uuhm. It’ll grow back?” Carlos offered, his free hand dropping to the pocket where his phone was.

“Oh!” Cecil exclaimed, perking up and smiling a little. “That’s right. It will.” Cecil lifted his hand from Carlos’ and rested his chin on the heel of his palm, grinning slightly dreamily at Carlos.

“It will for sure.” Carlos confirmed, shifting a little closer to the edge of the booth. “But uhm, I’m sorry Cecil, could you excuse me for a second? I was just gonna-“ Carlos waved towards the bathroom vaguely and nodded.

“Oh, of course darling Carlos, go ahead.” Cecil said, sitting up straight and smoothing down the front of his shirt. “Oh, have you ordered yet?”

“No, I was waiting on you, if you want though, you can order while I’m up. I don’t mind, and please, if you know what’s good on the menu just get that for me.” Carlos said, smiling kindly and escaping the booth quickly, all but running to the bathroom and missing Cecil’s lovestruck look.

In the bathroom Carlos scrubbed at his face, trying to rub the blush from his cheeks but only making them more red with his efforts. He cursed himself as he paced the small room and rubbed his stomach in slow circles, avoiding glancing in the mirrors once he realised his hair was standing up all over the place without its weight to hold it down.

“God damn it.” Carlos muttered. “I can’t leave Cecil sitting out there for too long.” Carlos tucked his hand under his shirt to massage at his stomach as a bad wave of pain hit him, making him double over and swear softly.

“I can do this. I can.” Carlos told himself, looking up and fixing himself with a glare in the mirror. “Just go out there. Say what you need to, get the answers you need. Try not to moan and swear. Just suck up the pain. Easy.” Carlos squeezed his eyes shut and then tried again, fixing himself with the look he imagined a football coach would make when giving a pep talk. “You can do this Carlos.”

Carlos pushed himself upright and took a moment to run some water through his hair, managing to flatten some bits down enough that it looked presentable, before leaving the bathroom and sliding back into the booth opposite Cecil.

“Sorry about that Cecil.” He said, smiling awkwardly and glancing at the bowl of salad? that was in front of his seat.

“It’s okay dearest Carlos, I understand.” Cecil said gently, reaching out to pat Carlos’ still-damp hand.

Carlos had to fight the urge to laugh. Cecil thought he understood, but how could he really? Instead Carlos nodded and smiled again and picked up his fork and poked around his bowl a little, trying to pick out a mouthful of salad.

Across the table Cecil slowly picked up his fork and shook out his napkin, laying it on his lap and occasionally glancing up to see if Carlos was enjoying his food. Cecil dug up a forkful of his own meal, some kind of rice dish with meat and beans mixed through, and ate it with ease while Carlos continued to poke around his bowl, trying to identify everything before putting anything in his mouth.

“Uh, Cecil, what is this?” Carlos eventually asked, looking up at the radio host with a chewed on lip and a furrowed brow that made Cecil’s breath stutter out of him and his cheeks pinken.

“Its, um.” Cecil paused and closed his eyes for a moment before blinking them open again. “It’s a Greek Salad. With um, extra pine meat.” Cecil nodded to himself and took another mouthful of his rice dish.

“Ah. Of course.” Carlos said, eventually giving in and just eating the salad, unexplained chunks of ‘pine meat’ and all.

“So,” Cecil started, pausing to swallow the last of his mouthful before continuing. “You wanted to ask me some questions?”

Carlos nodded quickly, digging in his lab coat pocket for his notebook while he swallowed. “Yes! There are some things around town that I, well, we, me and my team, would like to know whether they’re normal for here or not.” Carlos babbled, extracting his notebook and finding the right page.

“What kind of things?” Cecil asked, leaning forwards to peer over the top edge of Carlos’ notebook.

“Things like, like the Glow Cloud? Yesterday? Is that normal for Night Vale?” Carlos asked, patting down his pockets in search of his pencil stub only to remember he’d left it at the lab considering it was illegal. “Oh, uh, before you answer though, do you think I could record you? I don’t have anything to take notes with considering the ban on writing implements.”

“Not to worry Carlos, I always carry some spares.” Cecil grinned, tugging a pen out of his shirt pocket that Carlos had not noticed before. “This should work fine.”

Carlos blinked and stared and blinked again before grabbing the pen and hiding it with his arm as he leaned across the table in a panic. “Cecil,” he hissed, tugging the radio host in close. “ _Cecil this is illegal why do you just carry it around?_ ”

Cecil leaned back and laughed, a warm and rich sound that poured into Carlos’ ears and ran down to the tips of his toes. “My darling, naive, Carlos.” Cecil said, voice still rich with laughter as he grabbed the arm Carlos had slammed over the pen and lifted it gently, leaning in to whisper at the scientist. “Everyone ignores that law. Even the Sheriff’s Secret Police themselves.” Cecil sat back, stroking Carlos’ arm with his thumb. “Go ahead and use it, you won’t get in trouble.”

Carlos stared, eyes flicking between the innocuous pen lying on the table and Cecil’s reassuring grin. Carlos cleared his throat and gently nudged the pen back towards Cecil. “I, uhm, I think I’d rather just record our conversation?” Carlos asked, wincing as his voice squeaked. “Thank you though.” He said, feeling his cheeks flush again and trying to cover himself by taking another hurried mouthful of salad.

“Of course, whatever makes you most comfortable, sweet Carlos.” Cecil said, tucking the pen away again and watching as Carlos set up the recording app on his phone. “Now,” Cecil started when the recording was running. “You wanted to start with the Glow Cloud?”

“Yes, please.” Carlos said, leaning in to listen and, eventually, forgetting entirely about his salad.

oOo

Carlos left the diner two hours later with a phone full of audio recordings of Cecil talking about his town and telling Carlos, and by extension his team, everything they could want to know about the town. It was fascinating to watch Cecil talk, Carlos had found, with the way his whole body lit up with passion and knowledge. Some of the things he spoke about made it sound like he had been around for the founding of the town itself.

“That’s impossible, though.” Carlos told himself on the drive home. “He’d be nearly 300 years old if that was the case.” Carlos laughed to himself and pulled into the lab’s driveway, his laugh trailing off as he considered the deeper implications of the thought. “I might have to ask him how old he is…” Carlos muttered to himself as he climbed out of his car and made his way into the lab.

“How’d it go?” Rochelle asked as he stepped through the door, pulling the others’ attention to Carlos.

“I got two hours of Cecil talking about the town and answering our questions. Do you want to listen to it together or split it up?” Carlos answered, holding his phone out to the room at large.

“What was it like talking to him for that long?” Dave asked, edging closer and eyeing Carlos as if inspecting him for damage.

“It was good. He really knows his stuff about this place.” Carlos answered, passing his phone over to Stan when the younger scientist quietly asked for it.

“I bet it helps he’s cute, right?” Nils teased, slinging an arm over Carlos’ shoulders as he blushed.

“He’s very passionate about the town.” Carlos countered, pulling out of Nilanjana’s grip and retreating towards the stairs. “Now, I desperately need a shower and a three-hour nap. Not-“ Carlos said loudly, cutting Nilanjana off before she could even start her comment, “related to having being out for three hours with Cecil. Have fun with the recording.” Carlos climbed the stairs quickly and got into the shower for a brief, but thorough, scrub down before he fell into bed, flicking the radio on out of habit and smiling as he heard Cecil’s voice creep out of the speakers.

“The scientists have taken an interest in our little town’s history, dear listeners.” Cecil said, and Carlos could hear the grin in his voice and picture the way it curled the corner of his lips up. “In fact, I just got finished having lunch with the darling Carlos where he asked me all sorts of questions about our lovely little burgh and I answered them to the best of my ability.” Cecil sighed happily and Carlos blinked sleepily, a slow smile creeping across his face. “And I will tell you now, talking is my job listeners, it is what I am good at, but I could talk to Carlos all day just to get that enraptured look he had on his face again. With the way his lip was just so slightly bruised from his chewing on it, and the furrow to his brow when he didn’t understand something. It was a _perfectly enraptured_ expression.”

Cecil sighed again, smiling and thinking of Carlos while he sat behind his microphone. In his bed in the lab Carlos had fallen asleep in the early-afternoon sunlight and, although Cecil didn’t know Carlos was sleeping, he was at least hoping that Carlos was thinking of him too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So wow, what a chapter amirite?  
> You can find me on [tumblr](http://lonelyboyinthelab.tumblr.com), as always ~~(please do, im lonely and i love talking to people)~~  
>  or on [twitter](https://twitter.com/page_of_d)  
> or you can just comment here.  
> I do read and try to respond to all comments.
> 
> Now I'm gonna copy Carlos and pass out for three hours (prolly more though)  
> so Goodnight everyone  
> Goodnight.  
>  ~~i hope all of the formatting copied over properly, this is one of my first times copying from word instead of google docs~~


	4. Week Two Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carlos pushed himself upright with a groan and a hand pressed to a sharp pain in his side, just beneath his ribs. Once upright he scrubbed a hand across his face, focussing on massaging the bridge of his nose and his cheekbone where his glasses had been pressed while he slept as he squinted out the window at the sun, which lurked around the horizon a little longer before slinking beneath it and leaving him in the dark, as if it had been waiting for him to wake up before setting fully. 
> 
> \--  
> Josie and some Erikas visit, and the scientists consider starting a bowling league team.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Longest chapter to date, and of course it's a filler chapter.  
> I'm sorry this took two weeks to bring you. I literally couldn't have done it without the use of my mums laptop so, despite the way she disapproves of so much i do, thanks mum.

Carlos woke late in the evening to a rough knocking on his door and an unfamiliar, wizened  voice calling through the wood.

“Food’s up, if you wanted any.” The voice called, giving a final knock before wandering away, the muttering of “Ungrateful scientist, hasn’t even come out to introduce himself” carrying clearly though Carlos’ door.

Carlos pushed himself upright with a groan and a hand pressed to a sharp pain in his side, just beneath his ribs. Once upright he scrubbed a hand across his face, focussing on massaging the bridge of his nose and his cheekbone where his glasses had been pressed while he slept as he squinted out the window at the sun, which lurked around the horizon a little longer before slinking beneath it and leaving him in the dark, as if it had been waiting for him to wake up before setting fully. He blinked blearily around his room at the mess of clothes on his floor, the result of too many nights when he stumbled in and barely kicked his jeans off before falling into bed; and the puddle of towelling that he knew he'd have to hang up unless he wanted to be drying himself with a wet towel in the morning. Carlos dragged himself out of bed and through the open bathroom door, knocking his toothpaste off the edge of the sink as he turned the tap on, ducking his head to slurp up a few mouthfuls of water to ease the parchment feeling of his mouth, moving to tuck an imaginary length of hair out of the way only to jolt with the memory of getting it cut that morning. 

Carlos splashed some water on his face and dragged his damp fingers through his shortened hair, straightening to look at his reflection and examine his new hairstyle. Drips of water ran off Carlos’ chin and soaked into his collar as he examined himself in the mirror, tugging at his shorn curls, straightening them out to check their length and frowning softly when he saw just how short they were. 

“A little more length would have been nice…” He murmured, running his fingers through them again, and around the clippered back of his head. “Oh well.” Carlos sighed, turning the tap off and making his way back into the main body of his room, bouncing off the edge of the doorway as he passed through it. Carlos shuffled over to the pile of towels, scooping one up and patting his face dry with it before hanging the towel over the half-rack fastened to the back of the bathroom’s door to let it dry. He glanced at the other towel, still puddled on the floor but, spurred on by a loud growl from his stomach, ended up leaving it in favour of hunting down something to eat.

Carlos stumbled his way out of his room, squinting as the brightness of the living area as well as the smell of something deliciously home-cooked attacked his senses.

“Carlos! You’re awake!” Nilanjana called, craning her neck over the back of the couch to, presumably, grin at Carlos while the rest of the team gave variations of teasing ‘good morning’s. “We have visitors! And they brought food for us!” She continued, putting her plate on the coffee table and standing to show Carlos where the dishes were laid out on the bench. “Josie and her friends, Erika and Erika came to meet us all, and yeah brought us this great meal.

“Erika here said you had eaten at Big Rico’s every night last week, and well, what kind of concerned citizen would I be if I didn’t bring you all some proper food?” A voice called from the couch area, making Carlos turn and squint, as if that would help him see the speaker more clearly. 

“Well, thank you. We appreciate it.” Carlos said, rubbing at his ribs again and yawning.

“You should get those looked at.” Another new voice called, closer than the other one, coming from an impossibly tall seeming-person standing by the fridge. “May I?” A hand reached out towards Carlos, long fingers coming into focus as the being stepped closer.

“Uhm,” Carlos hesitated, shifting back just a touch.

“Leave the poor boy alone, Erika.” The first voice came again, sharp and chiding like a parent managing an unruly child. “But you should listen to Erika, you know. They don’t just say things like that for no reason.”

“At least put on something more comfortable on.” The other voice said softly, the hand retracting and the being’s shoulders? shifting with a huff.

“Maybe you should, you know.” Nilanjana said softly, resting a hand on Carlos’ shoulder. “You know none of us will see you any differently.” She continued, smiling reassuringly. “Also you should at least get your glasses. It’s not exactly fair on our visitors if you never see their faces.”

Carlos turned back to his room with a sigh, hand still pressed to his ribs. “Okay, you’re right. Make me up a plate in the meantime Nils?” 

“Sure thing boss.” Nilanjana said, smiling and pushing Carlos towards his room gently.

Carlos shuffled out of the room, pushing his door shut slowly before rushing to wriggle out of his shirt and binder, pressing a hand to his tender side. Carlos pressed gently along the line of his lower ribs, feeling for any unusual flexing in the bones, sighing in relief when he found none. 

“Gotta watch that.” He muttered, pulling his shirt back on sans-binder. “Was dumb to fall asleep in it.” Carlos picked up the lab coat he’d been wearing earlier and tugged it on, doing up the two lower buttons and tugging at the lapels until he felt it sat properly. “This’ll have to do.” Carlos sighed heavily, tucking his hands into the lab coat pockets for a mere second before pulling them out again and hunching his shoulders forwards. He raised a knee onto his bed, half-crawling onto it to grab his glasses from where they were half-tucked under his pillow, the lenses a mess of skin oils and the arms half-folded out.

“At least they’re not broken” Carlos shrugged, crawling back off his bed and making his way back out to the main room, where laughter bubbled from the couches as Carlos passed on his way to where he’d last seen the tissue box. 

“Your food’s here, boss.” Stan called, pointing at a full plate on the coffee table and nodding as Carlos held up his glasses.

“Anyone know where the tissues are?” Carlos asked the room at large when the bench space that had been occupied by the box that morning turned out to be empty.

“Here, let me get that for you.” The Erika lurking by the fridge said, holding a broad palm out for Carlos’ glasses.

“Thanks Erica.” Carlos said, dropping his glasses into their palm and watching as they swiped two long fingers over each lens before passing them back. Carlos slid his glasses back onto his face and got his first proper look at the lab’s visitors.

“It’s no problem,” Said Erika, smiling? with a face full of eyes. “Not for Perfect Carlos.” They winked, an impressive gesture where the eyes on the left half of their face all closed for a split second. “Also its Erika, with a ‘k’.”

Carlos bit his tongue and tried to keep his expression blank as he looked at Erika, taking in their eyes, the way their head nearly brushed the roof, the  _ wings coming out of their shoulder blades _ .

“E-erika. Y-you’re an Angel.” He said, voice shaking.

“Really, we prefer to just go by Erika.” Erika said, reaching out to press a gentle but unnaturally large hand to the top of Carlos’ head. “It means people don’t have to clarify that we don’t exist.” Erika frowned, or seemed to frown as much as a being with a face made entirely of eyes could frown. “The clarification hurts our feelings. But more Erika’s than mine or Erika’s.” Erika continued, gesturing vaguely out the lab’s front windows, then more specifically to themself and the other Erika, slumped in an armchair in the corner.

“O-oh.” Carlos stammered, looking away from the twin grinning mouths of the second Erika quickly when his head started to hurt as he tried to figure out how they’d managed to fold themself into, and kind of through but also over the back of, the armchair. “I’ll keep that in mind.” 

“Thank you, we’d all appreciate it.” The first Erika said, lifting their hand and nudging Carlos towards the rest of his team. “Now you should eat before your food gets cold. Josie helped us make it especially for you all.” 

Carlos nodded and made his way around the couch, falling into the gap between Stan and Nilanjana, studiously avoiding looking at the non-euclidian way Erika was sitting in their chair. He grabbed the plate in front of his seat, balancing it in his lap as he dug into the meal, some kind of meaty stew served on a hearty serving of mashed potato. 

“So,” He said, voice muffled slightly by the food in his mouth before he swallowed. “Sorry I didn’t come out earlier, I accidentally fell asleep. I’m Carlos.”

“I know who you are, I listen to the radio just like everyone else.” The other new voice snapped, the one that had chided Erika before. “Cecil certainly has a thing for you, you know?” Carlos looked up from his food, cheeks burning and feeling an odd kind of shame that usually only his grandmother could invoke in him. 

“I’m well aware.” Carlos said meekly, blinking at the old woman, Josie he guessed, sitting in the other armchair, thin wire frames perched on her nose and her curly grey hair pulled back into a loose bun.

“Then you should also be well aware that we won’t stand for you hurting our Cecil in any way.” The woman, presumed Josie, continued, over Carlos’ team’s muffled snickers.

“I…” Carlos paused and swallowed. “Do you mean ‘our’ as in your and the Erikas’ or…”

“All of Night Vale.” She corrected, frowning so fiercely at Carlos that he had to look away. “Cecil does the best he can, through the council and police censors, to bring us the news we need. So we all do our best to look out for him, which wasn’t a problem before a certain scientist came into town” Carlos studied his food intently, taking a small mouthful as he felt the woman (Josie?)’s glare settle over him. “But of course,” She continued, voice gentler and sounding of a smile. “That won’t be a problem as long as you treat him right.” Carlos looked up from his food into a warm smile, the only hint of the seriousness of the conversation in the glint of threat in the woman, likely Josie’s, eyes. 

“I-I won’t.” Carlos stammered, taken aback by the sudden change in tone. “I’ll do my best not to hurt him.”

The woman (Josie for sure, right?) nodded sagely. “I notice you didn’t promise.” She said, waving a hand at Carlos as stammered out the start of several explanations. “Ah, don’t worry, I get it. I’d much prefer you don’t try to promise than end up breaking one.” She smiled at him again, much kinder this time, and pointed at his plate. “Eat up, the Erikas wanted it made especially for you lot. Don’t let it get cold.”

Carlos nodded and took an almost too-big mouthful, holding a hand up to cover his mouth as he chewed messily and nodded his appreciation.

“I’m Josie. Or Old Woman Josie. Either way, smart boy like you probably already worked that out.” Josie (the woman) said, returning to their introductory conversation. 

Carlos swallowed loudly, coughing a little as a lump of something caught briefly in his throat.

“Josie was just telling us about life in Night Vale.” Dave said as Stan reached over to give Carlos’ back a good thump. “What it’s like now as opposed to the history Cecil gave us.”

“Oh, thank you Josie.” Carlos said, voice thin and weak before he swallowed and coughed again. “That information will definitely be helpful for us.” He finished, blinking away the tears that had formed in his eyes.

Josie waved him off with a dismissive noise. “As long as you’re not drop-dead stupid you’ll mostly get by fine. I was actually just telling them all about League Night. The season starts this Thursday, assuming it’s not cancelled, if any of you are interested.” Josie said, smiling hopefully around the circle. “We’re always looking for new teams. I know Cecil gets tired of beating Steve every other week, but there’s just no one else to play really.” 

“We could pull together a team, right Carlos?” Nilanjana said, turning to Carlos with a wide grin and a flutter of her eyelashes.

“Uhm, well. How many people make a team?” Carlos asked, pushing his food around his plate and still trying to work out what sport they were even talking about.

“Four is the norm. Five works too, you’d just have to have someone sit out for most games.” Josie answered, nodding to herself. “Our team is usually me, Cecil, whatever intern he can convince to come along and one of the Erikas. Erika over there is especially good at getting strikes.” The Erika folded into the other arm chair gave a half-wave that trailed their fingers through the side table next to them.

“It’s easy when you take the universal rumblings into account when you throw.” Erika said, shifting in their seat and sending several faintly-glowing feathers drifting towards the floor. “Though, all things considered, it would probably be best if you didn’t join, Carlos.” Erika continued, huffing slightly and frowning with both their mouths.

“What does that mean?” Carlos asked, turning to face Erika fully, despite the impending headache from looking at them for too long.

“Erika.” Josie growled warningly. “Carlos can join the league if he wants to.”

“But Lane 5, the  _ people _ . Come on Erika, you know what I’m talking about!” Erika turned to the other Erika, still standing by the fridge, who crossed the room in two intimidatingly large strides to hit Erika up the back of the head.

“ _ Erika _ .” They snapped, tugging on one of Erika’s wings. “Ixnay onway ethay itycay alktay. Eway antcay ustjay ogay aroundway alkingtay aboutway ethay ophecypray Erika!”

“Uhhh,” Carlos stalled, looking to his teammates for help only to recieve concerned looks and shrugs in reply. “What’s this about a prophecy?” He tried, startling the Erikas who were locked in some kind of intimidation display.

“We, uh.” Erika cleared their throat awkwardly, tugging the other Erika up out of their chair. “We’re needed... elsewhere. Bye.” The Erikas sidestepped out of reality, disappearing from view with a soft flutter and a looming feeling of anger.

Josie was the first one to break the silence that had fallen over the group with a heavy sigh. “Don’t let Erika get to you, you can join the league if you want.” She said, tugging her hair out of its bun and braiding it with lightly shaking hands. “We do need at least another team for the league to work properly, the Night Vale Daily Journal team pulled out because half the team was fired between seasons.” Josie continued, tying her braid off and tucking her hands into her lap. “And it’s so  _ good _ for Cecil to have something recreational to do after work.” 

Carlos scooped up the last mouthful of his meal, using the chasing of sauce and potato around his plate as an excuse to look away from Josie and her pointed looks at the mention of Cecil.

“Station Management works him so hard, between the reporting and the grovelling and the sigil upkeep. I’m sure if it wasn’t prophesied he would have quit long ago.” Josie hummed softly, almost wistfully. “He works so hard that boy.”

Carlos shifted uncomfortably and leaned forwards to start stacking up the plates that had been left on the table as the others had finished. “A-anyone want tea? Or coffee?” He asked as he stood up, collecting the stack of plates and moving over to place them in the sink.

“Ooh, if you’re making I’ll go for tea!” Stan called with a grin.

“Tea would be lovely, dear.” Josie called with a warm smile before turning towards Stan and, from the sounds of it, resuming an earlier conversation.

“I’ll pass, I think I’m just gonna turn in.” Rochelle called, yawning and heaving herself off the couch. “G’night.”

“I’m gonna do the same. Night.” Dave said, standing as well and heading off towards his room. 

Carlos filled the kettle and watched as Dave and Rochelle disappeared into their respective rooms and Nilanjana stood and stretched. 

“You turning in too Nils?” Carlos asked, turning the tap off and setting the kettle on its base to boil.

“Nah, just needed a stretch.” Nilanjana said, meandering over towards Carlos with a brief pause by the fridge to get the milk out. “Also there’s no way you’ll be able to carry four cups of tea without spilling them.”

Carlos laughed softly as he pulled four mugs out of the cupboard. “Is that a challenge?” He asked jokingly as he spooned sugar into two of the cups, for himself and Nilanjana, before hesitating over the third.

“Hey, Josie, sorry to interrupt.” Carlos called over his shoulder. “How do you take your tea?”

“With just a splash of milk.” Josie answered, quickly returning to her conversation as Carlos put the sugar away.

“So… Are you as curious about this Station Management as I am?” Nilanjana asked, dropping a tea bag into each cup along the line. 

“Why, because they work Cecil so hard?” Carlos scoffed, crossing his arms over his chest. “No. It’s not my place to investigate.” He continued, shrinking in on himself a little. “Though I do feel bad, it sounds like he had no choice when it came to working there.”

“What if I told you it was exactly the kind of thing we  _ could _ investigate though?” Nilanjana said, leaning back against the bench and tapping a teaspoon against her palm. “You missed his show earlier. It sounds like ‘Station Management’ is actually some kind of creature. Here,” she continued, pulling her phone out of her pocket. “I started recording it when we realised he was on.” 

A second later and Cecil’s voice is coming out of Nilanjana’s phone’s speaker, still managing to sound deep and rich despite the weak nature of the speaker. “-the radio station it’s contract negotiation season with the Station Management again. That’s always an interesting time.” The kettle came to a boil and Carlos picked it up to start pouring water into the line of mugs as he listened to Cecil speak. “Now, obviously I’m not allowed to go into details, but negotiating is difficult when you’re never allowed to glimpse what you’re negotiating with.” Carlos hummed softly as he set the kettle back down and stepped aside to allow Nilanjana in to stir the cups that needed stirring. “Station Management stays inside their office at all times, only communicating with us through sealed envelopes that are spat out from under the door like a sunflower shell through teeth.” 

“Okay but that doesn’t necessarily mean anything.” Carlos said, dunking the teabags and then pulling them out and dropping them into the sink as a temporary storage spot before they end up in the bin later.

“Just wait.” Nilanjana countered, adding milk to three of the mugs in the line.

“-hope management hears. Sometimes you can see movement through the frosted glass, large shapes shifting around, strange tendrils whipping through the air.” Nilanjana paused the broadcast and looked at Carlos with a raised eyebrow.

“So, should it go on our list?” She asked, picking up her and Josie’s mugs and waiting for Carlos to take his and Stan’s.

“Maybe.” Carlos said, picking up the mugs and leading the way back to the others. “Maybe it’s something we should just leave alone, though.” He hummed, passing Stan his tea and settling into the armchair that had been occupied by an Erika earlier.

“Could we at least ask Cecil about it though?” Nilanjana pleaded, settling into the couch closest to Carlos.

Carlos sipped at his tea and sighed, running his free hand through his hair. “I can  _ ask _ . But if he says no, then that’s it, okay?” Carlos gave in, tugging his phone out and typing a rough draft of the request.

“Thank you boss.” Nilanjana grinned, taking a deep sip of her tea.

“Just don’t make me regret it, okay?” Carlos said, waving away Nilanjana’s thanks.

The pair fall into a comfortable silence, sipping at their tea and watching Stan and Josie talk instead of talking themselves.

“-overall though I think we’re all doing just fine. Dave’s probably having the most trouble settling in but that’s because so far he’s had basically nothing to work with.” Stan finished, picking up his mug of tea and cradling it in his hands.

“What do you think, Carlos?” Josie asked, watching him expectantly as she sipped her tea. “How are you all settling in?”

Carlos hummed and cleared his throat. “Overall well. Like Stan said, Dave’s likely having the hardest time, but that’s more because he’s got a three-year backlog of data to get through with no evidence that the data is real.” Carlos gestured to the piles of papers sitting around the room, some stacked neatly and others more haphazard looking. “Stan’s mostly been holed up working on his time theories,” Carlos teased gently, smiling at the youngest to show he didn’t mean offence, “but he’s doing well when it comes to the everyday parts of life. He learned the Bloodstone chants like a pro.” Carlos paused to sip at his tea before continuing. “Nils has taken to the town like a fish to water, always bouncing from one thing to another. The Glow Cloud was a great day for her.” Carlos laughed, grinning at Nilanjana’s eager smile.

“The Glow Cloud was great, I had so many things to look at yesterday, we got so many notes.” She gushed, nearly spilling her tea with her wide gestures.

“And Rochelle has been pretty similar, though she’s a little more wary about things, which is fair enough. She’s been getting amazing results though and it’s really encouraging to see her settling in.” Carlos nodded as he finished, tucking his legs up onto the armchair in front of him and yawning quietly while he rearranged the ends of his lab coat to serve as a makeshift blanket.

“And what about you? How are you settling in?” Josie asked, setting her empty cup on the coffee table.

“I’m doing okay. It’s a lot of culture shock all at once. And my work is more vague than everyone else’s so I’ve mostly been hovering, supervising, helping when people need it and doing shopping runs.” Carlos chuckled softly only to get interrupted by a yawn. “It’s a great town though. I’m really enjoying it here.” He murmured, blinking slowly and drinking down the last of his tea.

Everyone drifted into quiet, Stan and Nilanjana sipping their tea slowly and Josie humming a soft song to herself, or the room. Carlos sat curled in his chair, empty cup slowly becoming held more by his knees and chest than his hands and eyes sliding towards being closed more than open.

“You should be getting to bed.” Josie said suddenly, jolting Carlos out of his doze and startling a yelp from Nilanjana. “And besides, it’s getting late and I should be going. I’ll have to make sure Erika and Erika aren’t causing too much trouble.” Josie worked herself upright with a small groan while Carlos did much the same across the room. 

“I’ll walk you out.” He said, yawning and tugging his lab coat more tightly around himself.

“Thank you, but I think one of the others should do it.” Josie countered, reaching out to pat Carlos’ cheek gently as he approached her. “You’re practically asleep on your feet.”

“Yeah boss, I can do it.” Stan said, dropping his hand on Carlos’ shoulder. “Go to bed man.”

“If you’re sure…” Carlos trailed off, swaying slightly and yawning.

“Absolutely.” Stan said, nodding and starting to lead Josie towards the stairs. 

“Well, thank you for the food Josie, and for the company. Good night, get home safe.” Carlos said, waiting for the pair to disappear down the stairs before turning back towards Nilanjana. “If you want to leave the mugs for the morning, go ahead. And can I get a copy of today’s radio show off you?”

“Sure thing boss, I’ll bluetooth it to you.” Nilanjana said, standing and stretching before pulling her phone out to transfer the file.

“Thanks.” Carlos turned his phone on, making sure his bluetooth was turned on and waiting for the file.

The file transfer went smoothly and Carlos shuffled off towards his room. “Remember to turn the lights off, g’night.” He muttered as he left, waving vaguely in response to Nilanjana’s goodnight before he kicked his door shut and fell into bed. 

A loose hand set Carlos’ phone on his bedside table, sleepily opening the music app and starting a playback of Cecil’s broadcast. The same hand slunk back to bed and extracted Carlos’ glasses from underneath his head to carefully put them aside, next to his phone. Carlos let Cecil’s voice wash over him, the deep notes soothing the scientist at what felt like a molecular level as he wriggled his way under his sheets and fell asleep a mere second later.

oOo

The morning dawned bright and early and loudly, the sun emerging at an early 4:30am by Carlos’ phone with a wave of light and a sound like a shriek. Carlos blinked awake, heart pounding from the suddenness of the sound, and elsewhere in the lab he heard a thud as though someone had fallen out of their bed. Carlos yawned and sat up, stretching and wincing slightly as his lower ribs twinged. He climbed out of bed slowly, feeling the chill of the early morning air as compared to the comfort of his bed. Carlos yawned and stood, pressing a hand to his stomach as a brief twinge of pain started up there as well. 

Carlos made his way to his bathroom for a quick wake-up shower in lukewarm water, and a thorough tooth brushing after he’d pulled on a clean pair of underwear with a pad carefully stuck in place. Carlos dressed quietly, leaving a binder laid out on his bed for if he needed it later in the day, in a loose shirt and a well-worn and stained pair of jeans. He tugged his oldest lab coat on, the one he’d had since high school with burnt cuffs and nearly worn-through elbows, and grabbed his glasses before leaving his room to start the day properly.

A lot of dishwashing, one pot of coffee and a pan full of bacon and eggs later and the rest of the team emerged slowly from their rooms, starting with Nilanjana in pink and blue plaid pyjama pants and a loose tank top, scrubbing a hand over her face and complaining about the time.

“Did you not sleep or something? It’s like 5am.” She yawned, slouching over and pouring herself a cup of coffee, gulping it down without her usual milk and sugar.

“The sunrise woke me. Also it’s more like 6:30” Carlos said, topping up his own mug from the coffee pot. “I’m making breakfast.” He offered as Nilanjana flopped into one of the armchairs with a low groan.

“Good.” Nilanjana said, yawning again and slinging an arm over her eyes.

Dave and Stan were the next to emerge, both with wild bedhead and owlish blinks. Stan was shirtless, with a pair of low-slung tracksuit pants flowing loosely around his legs, and Dave was mildly more put together, with jeans on but an old, worn sleepshirt and a lab coat draped across his shoulders.

“Good morning! Breakfast won’t be long, there’s coffee in the pot.” Carlos greeted them, laughing at their unintelligible greeting noises as they slumped onto a couch, half-leaning on each other as they waited. “Can one of you come make some toast?”

A chorus of groans came from the team as Carlos flipped the bacon in the pan, followed by the sounds of someone trying to get up only to fall back into their seat.

“Ugh, I’ve got it.” Nilanjana muttered, rolling herself off the armchair and upright, scratching at her arm as she shuffled over to the kitchen, grabbing the loaf of bread and making her way to the toaster. With the last of the bacon and eggs in the pan under Carlos’ watch, four slices of toast in the toaster and Nilanjana slumped half-asleep against the bench, Rochelle emerged from her room, fully dressed and braiding back her shower-damp hair.

“Good morning!” Rochelle called, bustling past Stan and Dave to pour herself a mug of coffee. “What smells so good?” She asked, replacing the coffee filter and starting a new pot.

“Breakfast. Bacon, eggs and toast.” Carlos answered, turning the hotplate off and flipping the eggs and bacon out of the pan onto the foil-covered plate with the rest of the food.

“Oooh nice. I’ll set the table.” Rochelle said, bouncing over to gently hip-check Nils out of the way of the cutlery draw so she could get the requisite number of knives and forks. The plates were grabbed freshly-cleaned, straight from the dishwasher and distributed around the table, paired with the cutlery and coasters for everyone’s coffee mugs.

“So who actually wants toast, and how much?” Nilanjana called as the first load of toast popped up, pulling them out and setting the slices on the food plate while trying to work out how many more slices to do.

“I’ll just have one thanks.” Carlos said, tucking the foil back around the food neatly.

Stan grunted and held up two fingers while Dave just gave a thumbs up and pulled himself upright while Stan slipped over to lay in the other’s lap with a soft huff.

“I’ll take two please.” Rochelle answered, collecting everyone’s coffee mugs and pouring from the fresh pot.

“Okay, 1, 3, 4, 6 and I’ll have one so 7….” Nilanjana muttered to herself, yawning and slotting three slices of bread into the toaster. “Won’t be a moment guys.”

“Thanks, Nils.” Carlos said, grinning at her and squeezing her hand on his way to the fridge, returning with the milk, which he passed to Rochelle for coffees, and butter which he set on the table with a spare knife.

“You can thank me by telling me how you and Rochelle are so awake right now.” Nils grumbled, sliding down the bench to get her coffee the second Rochelle was done stirring.

“Showers work wonders for waking you up, hon.” Rochelle answered, teasingly slapping at Nils’ hand with the teaspoon as she grabbed her coffee. “Patience, you’ll make me spill.”

Nilanjana gasped, stepping away and clutching her coffee to her chest with a look of mock-horror on her face. “You  _ wouldn’t _ .” 

“Not on purpose, no.” Rochelle giggled. “You should check the toast though. Looks like it’s burning.” She continued, pointing to the toaster where a thin stream of smoke was flowing out of the top of it.

“Oh shit.” Nilanjana all but dropped her coffee mug onto the bench in her haste to get to the toaster and hit the cancel button.

“Well.” Carlos said, watching the proceedings with an amused smile. “Looks like breakfast is officially ready.” He gathered as many of the coffee mugs as he could and set them in everyone’s places, each of them with a different science pun based on their individual areas of study. “Come on you two, wake up.” Carlos called, swinging wide on his path around the table to nudge Stan’s shoulder and offer Dave, who was at least upright, a hand up.

They managed to coax Stan awake and to the table, Dave filling his plate with eggs and bacon and his two requested slices of toast while the younger gulped down his coffee and then went for an immediate refill, returning to the table mildly more awake and ready to eat.

Everyone else served themselves, Nils taking more bacon than eggs but Rochelle balancing it out by taking three eggs and no bacon, and soon the table was filled with the sounds of cutlery and contented hums as the team ate.

“So,” Carlos started, pausing for a mouthful of coffee, “what’s on the agenda for everyone today? I know I’m gonna contact Cecil and see if we can take a look at Station Management.” He finished, gesturing between himself and Nilanjana.

“I was gonna go around, do some air tests a little ways out in the sand wastes, maybe by Radon Canyon. Probably take a geiger counter with me, see what kind of readings we get.” Rochelle said, giving in and plucking a slice of bacon from the pile and chewing on it slowly.

“Could I catch a ride? I want to get some soil samples from around the place.” Dave jumped in. “Also I’d like to look at the layers in Radon Canyon, see how the land settled around here.”

“Yeah, you’re welcome to.” Rochelle grinned. “Stan, do you wanna come along too? See the sights, investigate the sand wastes and stuff?”

“Nah, I have clocks to take apart.” Stan said, stretching and yawning. “Did I show you what I’ve been finding in them boss?” Carlos, mouthful of egg and toast, shook his head and gestured for Stan to go on. “Some of the clocks are empty, others are full of this weird gunk. I mean, some are just fine, normal clocks with gears and stuff, but others… aren’t.”

“Huh.” Carlos said, swallowing loudly. “That is… interesting.”

“And absolutely not normal.” Rochelle added. “Are these clocks that were made here? Or were they imported?” 

“Hm that’s a good question. I mean I know they were all working, if not on the same time, before I took them apart.” Stan dragged a hand through his bed-mussed hair. “Maybe I should tag along, can we stop at Target and ask about the clocks? Maybe whatever other stores sell clocks or watches here…”

“Sure thing kiddo.” Rochelle said, grinning all the way. “It’ll be great fun.”

Stan grinned widely, pushing away from the table and picking up his empty plate. “Sweet. I’m gonna go shower.”

“So we’ve all got plans. Good.” Carlos said, standing up and clearing his own plate. “I’m going to message Cecil. Also we should probably return Josie’s dishes to her.” He added, seeing the dishes set aside on the bench. “She lives by a car lot right? We can look for a second-hand pickup for you, Nils, while we’re there.”

“Aw yes, truck time!” Nilanjana cheered, throwing her hands in the air.

“Maybe. If we can find room for it in the budget.” Carlos cautioned despite his laughter at her enthusiasm. 

“Yeah, yeah, go message Cecil already. The sooner we get to the station the sooner we can go looking at trucks.” Nilanjana said, waving Carlos off. “We’ll clean up since you cooked.”

“Okay, thank you.” Carlos said, heading to his room briefly to get his phone and then going downstairs to have some sense of privacy while he messaged Cecil.

Carlos tugged his lab coat around him as he crossed the main lab floor, hopping up to sit on the bench and lean back against the front windows, his legs tucked up in front of him. He unlocked his phone, he didn’t usually have passcode locks but the Secret Police had requested it of him so it would ‘at least be a challenge to read your text history’, and was surprised to be greeted by a series of messages from Cecil already.

They had come through late last night, after Carlos had gone to bed properly, and started with a ‘I’m sorry if this is interrupting some Important Science but, dear Carlos, I was just too excited to wait a moment longer to ask! And also it is far too late and you should definitely not still be doing Science at this time as the Sheriff’s Secret Police may have to take you in for Late Night Industriousness.’ Carlos couldn’t help but laugh and blush at the message and scroll down to read the next one. ‘Oh dear this was supposed to all fit in once message and now I’ve gone and gone too far over the character limit. I am so sorry darling Carlos, but I still have not asked what I actually wanted to ask yet so I will get right to the point… in the next message (oops).’ Carlos dropped his head to his knees and laughed, being able to easily picture Cecil fidgeting and getting flustered as his verbose nature got the best of him in his messages. 

Carlos took a moment to breathe and wipe a tear from his eye before reading the final message from Cecil. ‘Anyway, the whole point of this was to say, wonderful Carlos, a little birdy told me that you might be putting together a team for the bowling league? I would like to encourage you to do just that! It is just the perfect way to blow off some steam after a long work week! Also Teddy Williams does the best buffalo wings in town and you get a discount if you’re part of the league.’

It was endearing, in a way, that Cecil was so eager to tell Carlos to go for it and make a bowling team that he just couldn’t wait for the morning to text Carlos about it. Carlos grinned at his phone, tapping his fingers against his knee as he tried to work out how to reply.

‘We are thinking about putting together a team, Cecil. My only concern is that Erika said something about Lane 5 and how that means I shouldn’t play with everyone? But Josie said not to listen to them, and besides, if anything does happen we are Scientists and we are equipped to deal with a great many things. So I guess the answer is this. Yes, we are putting together a league team.’ Carlos reread the message twice before deeming it satisfactory and sending it, immediately starting on another message to ask his question in turn. ‘Also, on a different note, I was wondering if a member of my team and myself could come by the station today and have a look at your Station Management. Some of the things we heard on the radio yesterday, as well as some of the things Josie has said, have us worried that what you are working for is… not entirely human. Would that be okay?’ 

Carlos sent the second message and passed time by checking his email, flicking through heavily-censored newsletters from various sources and only slightly-censored queries from the university about how the team is settling into town. He quickly composed a reply to the latter, an email that said the bare minimum needed to respond in as simple language as possible in the hope it would get past the Secret Police and come out barely-censored or, ideally, not censored at all. Email sent, Carlos did a round of inbox cleansing, deleting anything too censored to be legible or from mailing lists he just couldn’t work out how to get off, and ended up left with updates from the grant bank account and a few emails from various colleagues that will take time to decipher through the censoring.

Since Cecil still hadn’t replied by the time Carlos was done with his inbox purge, Carlos delved into the grant account updates, working out how much they had left and thus how much he could afford to put towards a pickup truck without running out of money before the next grant season came around.

Half-way through Carlos’ calculations, Stan came downstairs, freshly showered and dressed and with his arms full of mostly assembled clocks.

“So, hey, before you go out, and before we go out,” Stan said, stopping at one of the lab tables and setting down his clocks, “I thought you should take a look at these, see what I’m talking about y’know?”

“Sounds good.” Carlos said, sliding off his bench and tucking his phone into his pocket. “Which of these came from around here and which ones did I buy at Target?” He asked, watching as Stan laid all the clocks out based on their internal workings.

“Red sticker is from one of us, yellow is one that was already here and green is one you bought from Target.” Stan said, pointing out the little coloured squares stuck to the backs of the clocks, just above where they opened to the inner workings.

“So there’s no pattern to it?” Carlos asked, examining the mix of labels in each grouping of clocks. 

“I mean, there are comparatively more empty ones amongst the clocks we bought with us into town, but otherwise no pattern.” Stan answered, poking at one of the lumps of gunk, grey and gelatinous and filling up the space where gears should be, in a wall clock from the lab.

“Do they still work? When you put the… stuff back in place and put the backs back on?” Carlos asked, pulling his little pencil stub out of his pocket and poking at one of the lumps.

“As far as I’ve observed, yeah.” Stan picked up one of the clocks filled with grey gunk and slotted the back of it into place, fastening it with a screwdriver he pulled from his pen pocket and turning the clock over to show Carlos the ticking second hand.

“Interesting.” Carlos hummed, tugging his phone out of his pocket as it started ringing. “One moment, Stan.”

Carlos swiped to answer, a grin stealing across his face as he saw Cecil’s name on the screen, and stepped away from the clocks.

“Hello, Carlos speaking.”

“Carlos! Darling Carlos! You  _ cannot _ investigate Station Management! It would only end badly for you and your team!” Cecil was all but shouting, making Carlos pull his phone away from his ear and curse softly.

“What? Cecil, calm down, you can’t know that, my team and I are equipped to handle more than you’d think.” Carlos said, slightly indignant that Cecil thought they wouldn’t be able to handle whatever it was that served as his management.

“I don’t doubt that Carlos, brave Carlos, but I must insist that you Do Not Investigate Station Management. There are only so many ways to placate them and we are currently running low on interns.” Cecil took a shaky breath before continuing. “If you listened to the full broadcast yesterday, which you said you did but I wonder now if you only listened to part of it instead, you would know that Station Management does not like being discussed in any sort of specifics, and in fact it nearly cost me my job, and by extension my life, yesterday to even say as much as I did, so I shudder to think about what would happen should your curious self and one of your team tried to explore in more depth. So please, perfect Carlos, do not investigate Station Management.”

“Ooh.” Carlos said, voice trembling as his mind raced through everything that Cecil had just told him. “So it’s actually  _ dangerous _ for you to talk about your management?”

“Only if I’m at the station and they can hear me.” 

“But if we met, say, at the Arby’s, then you could tell me all you know about them?”  Carlos asked gently, crossing his fingers and hoping Cecil would agree, but not wanting to push the radio host.

“Well, I suppose…” Cecil said, voice no longer shaky with terror but lighter, more like what Carlos normally heard from him.

“Or we could meet at the Moonlight.” Carlos added quickly, made uncertain by Cecil’s slight hesitance. “Or, y’know, anywhere else you’d rather meet.” 

“Considerate Carlos, the place of our meeting does not concern me. No, rather it is the timing that could be… problematic.” Cecil said, smile evident in his compliments even as it faded to a musing frown, or so Carlos assumed.

“Oh, well, that’s okay! Whatever time suits you will work for us! We don’t have much in the way of solid plans today.” Carlos reassured hastily, turning back to face the bench, his pencil stub out and ready to write the meeting time down.

“In that case, maybe… 2 o’clock? I can take my lunch break then.” Cecil hummed to himself as Carlos nodded and then, remembering he was on the phone, confirmed out loud for Cecil.

“2 o’clock works great for us. At the Arby’s?” Carlos asked, scrawling a smudged ‘2pm @ Arby’s’ onto the bench as Cecil made a noise of agreement into the phone.

“I will see you then, sweet Carlos, but for now I have to go, the interns won’t inculcate themselves with a fear of the coffee machine in the break room. Goodbye, dear Carlos.”

“Bye Cecil!” Carlos said, hanging up with a grin and a bounce on his heels.

“Got another hot date?” Stan teased, carefully packing up his clocks as Dave and Rochelle came down the stairs.

“It’s not a date, it’s a work meeting.” Carlos countered, helping Stan slot the clock backs into place, even though his grin hadn’t lessened and now he could feel the beginnings of a blush on his cheeks. “And besides, Nils is gonna be there too.”

“Oh so you’re gonna make Nils the third wheel? Carlos how inconsiderate of you.” Rochelle called, picking over the container of portable air testers. 

“You guys are the worst, you know?” Carlos said, grin sliding into a mock frown as he helped Stan pile the clocks into his arms to be carried back upstairs.

“I would argue otherwise,” Dave said, a teasing smirk on his face as he pulled his work boots on. “We’re not the ones taking an innocent team member on a date.”

“Ha ha you got me, afterwards we’re gonna buy Nils ice cream and leave her with it in the car while we have a quickie in his studio.” Carlos deadpanned, cheeks reddening further and faux-frown loosening into a reassuring smile when Rochelle and Dave looked at him in concern.

“What’s this about me and ice cream?” Nilanjana called from the second floor, skipping around and down the stairs with a grin.

“Nothing, nothing.” Carlos said with a laugh, waving her towards the door and her shoes. “But we do have a change in plans. We’re not allowed to investigate Station Management, however Cecil has agreed to tell us everything he knows over lunch, so until then we’re going to…” Carlos turned to scan the ‘To Investigate’ list. “I don’t know, choose one of those things Nils, we’re going to investigate one of those this morning and then go meet Cecil via Josie’s to drop her dishes off.” Carlos tugged his phone out and sighed at the time. “Also its apparently already 10:30 so we should get a move on with it. I’m gonna…” Carlos gestured at himself and sighed. “Y’know. Pick something to study and get the relevant tools, okay Nils? I’ll be back in a second.” 

“Sure thing boss!” Nilanjana called, doing up her last shoelace and skimming down the ‘To Investigate’ list, muttering to herself.

Carlos made his way upstairs, patting Stan on the shoulder on his way past as Stan was laying all the clocks out again according to their original location. When he reached the top floor, Carlos stopped by the kitchen sink to have a glass of water before continuing on to his room, where he slipped out of his lab coat and shirt to wriggle into his binder, taking a moment to make sure everything sat right and his ribs weren’t hurting as he moved. Satisfied with his comfort level, and unsure what he’d do even if he wasn’t, Carlos pulled his shirt and lab coat back on and grabbed a pair of socks. On the way back down Carlos grabbed Josie’s dishes from the bench and hummed to himself, ignoring the small twinges of pain in his stomach and legs, partially from general biology and partially from not being used to this many stairs, as he descended, this time past Stan’s empty desk, to the bottom floor.

Carlos carefully set down Josie’s dishes and climbed up onto the bench to put his shoes and socks on, tuning in to the quiet chatter between the rest of the team as they prepared themselves. Nilanjana was asking Rochelle for advice on which sensors to take with them to investigate what sounded like the Desert Creek house, while Dave and Stan shared a more tangential conversation as Dave gathered a variety of sample jars and Stan double checked his checklist.

Carlos tugged his socks on haphazardly, having to stop and straighten them out before he could shove his feet into his sneakers and do up his laces. When he managed to get his shoes and socks on decently he hopped off the bench, landing with a bounce and a clap to pull everyone’s attention to him.

“So we all know what we’re doing today, and it seems like this day is determined to run away from us, so let’s get to work guys. We have Science to do.” With that, Carlos grabbed his car keys from the hook by the door and breezed through it, unlocking his car and climbing into it before realising he’d left Josie’s dishes on the lab bench.

Carlos sighed, dropping the seat belt he’d been halfway through pulling on, and opened his door again, starting to climb out when Nilanjana emerged, a bag full of equipment slung over her body, Josie’s dishes in her hands and a laughing grin on her face.

“Forget something boss?” She called, opening the car’s hatchback to put the equipment in before climbing into the passenger seat.

“Look, I was excited about Science. Can you blame me?” Carlos protested, starting the car and backing into the street.

“Science, sure.” Nilanjana said, rolling her eyes and smirking. “Anyway, I bought one of ‘Chelle’s back up air testers, and a full set of the sensors, as well as one of the long-distance thermometers, some sample jars because Dave wants some soil samples from the area and did you know we have colour detectors? Cause we do and I grabbed one of those. Not exactly sure what we’ll do with it but you know, we’ll work it out. Oh also one of the cameras” Nilanjana rattled off, counting the various meters off on her fingers as she went.

“Sounds good. Did you bring something to take notes with?” Carlos asked, reaching out to switch the radio off, the soft piano and guttural howling having been putting him on edge.

“I have a clipboard? And a note book? But I didn’t grab anything to write with. Shit.” 

“It’s okay, I should still have…” Carlos turned into the Desert Creek development, patting down his lab coat pockets in search of his pencil stub. “Aha! This.” Carlos pulled out the pencil stub and passed it to Nilanjana. “Don’t lose it or break it. I’ll need it back.”

Nilanjana gasped and refused to take the pencil. “Carlos  _ you know that’s illegal _ .” She hissed, pushing Carlos’ hand down and out of view from the windows.

“Basically everyone uses pens and pencils anyway. Cecil told me, and I can confirm it’s not just him, I’ve seen a bunch of people using them.” Carlos explained, pulling in to park in front of the House That Didn’t Exist. “I think it’s as long as you’re not too cocky about it you’ll be fine.”

“If it’s all the same to you though, I’ll let you take the notes.” Nilanjana said, climbing out and setting Josie’s dishes on the seat in her place as she went to get the equipment from the back of the car.

Within half an hour they run out of tests they can do. They measured the temperatures around the block of land and find them all to be mostly uniform, cooler in the shade of the House and warmer in the sunlight, like you’d expect if the house was there, but the House doesn’t show up in any of their photos and the colour detector doesn’t read the light pink of the House’s walls or the dark brown of it’s trim. Halfway through their air sampling Nilanjana realised it’s kind of useless since neither of them know what the normal make up of air in Night Vale is, much less in the rest of the world, but Carlos took down all their measurements anyway in the hopes that Rochelle can decipher them later. While Nilanjana gathered dirt samples, muttering frustratedly into her phone at Dave who was talking her through digging up the samples, Carlos doodled around their notes, sketching out all the molecules they’d tested for in the air and other, more interesting, molecules like serotonin and oxytocin and melanin. 

When Carlos checked the time and found it to be 12:30 already he wasn’t exactly shocked, and he definitely didn’t nearly slip from his perch on the hood of his car, but he was surprised by it, enough to call out to Nilanjana about it.

“Hey, do you still have Dave on the phone?” Carlos called, dusting himself off and stepping over to Nilanjana who was still crouched in the dirt.

“Yeah, why?” Nilanjana asked, looking up at Carlos and squinting from the sunlight. 

“Can you ask him to ask Stan if time is being especially weird today or if it’s just my perspective?” Carlos asked, taking a step to the left to block the sun from Nilanjana’s eyes and getting an appreciative thumbs up.

While Carlos waited for his question and its answer to be relayed, he took some notes of his own on the passing of time that day, sketching out a timeline from when he woke up at 4:30 to the present alleged time of 12:30, filling in other times he remembered checking his phone and how much time he felt like had passed in the gaps.

“Stan says that time is definitely weirder today, and he’s trying to work out what’s going on, so it’s not just you boss.” Nilanjana reported, screwing the lid onto the last sample jar and pushing herself upright, wobbling slightly since she was still holding her phone to her ear.

“Okay, good. Tell him thanks.” Carlos said, taking the filled jar and the shovel off Nilanjana and tucking them into the equipment back before loading it back into the car. “We should get moving, though, if a half hour is roughly equivalent to 2 hours according to the clock we’ll be late if we don’t hurry.” He continued, climbing into his seat and holding Josie’s dishes while Nilanjana climbed in, hanging up and tucking her phone away while she took the dishes off Carlos.

“To Josie’s?” Nilanjana asked as Carlos pulled away from the curb. 

“Yup. Only quickly though. We’ll probably find that by the time we get there we’ll have to really rush to meet Cecil on time.” Carlos answered, making a neat u-turn and heading back towards town. “Where are the others at?”

“They’re out at Radon Canyon right now. Getting a significantly high reading on the geiger counter, but considering that their counter is still working I guess it’s less than you’d get at the radio station.” Nilanjana said, clutching Josie’s dishes close as Carlos made a sharp turn with no warning.

Carlos nodded and hummed softly, turning onto the main road in town and driving out towards Josie’s edge of town. “That’s interesting. Isn’t it named after the uranium deposits in the rock?”

“Plutonium, but yeah.” Nilanjana corrected, looking out her window at the used car lot as they passed it to park in front of Josie’s house, where an Erika, one with five wings and an extra set of arms, but the usual number of eyes and mouths, was doing some pruning of the front hedges.

The scientists climbed out of the car, Nilanjana carrying Josie’s dishes but more focussed on scanning the car lot for any decent-looking pickups.

“Hi, Erika.” Carlos called, waving as three of Erika’s hands, the three not holding the small chainsaw they were using to prune, waved at them. “Josie left these with us last night and we wanted to return them. Is she in right now? Or should we leave them with you?” He asked, leaning on the whitewashed front fence and tugging on Nilanjana’s lab coat sleeve to get her to pay more attention.

“You’d have better luck on Craigslist. The salesmen are much more friendly there.” Erika said, waving a dismissive hand at the car lot. “But yeah, sure leave them with me. I’ll let her know you came by.” Erika turned off the chainsaw and held a pair of hands out for the dishes, whisking them away with a side-step out of view before reappearing in the yard. 

“Thanks Erika. Nice to meet you.” Carlos said, grinning and waving as he turned back to the car. 

“You too.” Erika said, struggling to turn the chainsaw back on. “But seriously. Just use Craigslist. It’ll save you  _ so much _ trouble.” They said to Nilanjana, waving at her with one hand while their other three managed to get the chainsaw back on and resumed pruning.

“Okay. Thanks Erika.” Nilanjana said, jogging around to the passenger side of the car as Carlos climbed in and started the engine.

“So, Craigslist?” Carlos asked, pulling away from Josie’s house with a last wave at Erika.

“I guess. I wonder what’s wrong with the car lot though.” Nilanjana mused.

“Another thing we can ask Cecil, I suppose.” Carlos sighed, turning onto the road with the Arby’s on it.

Nilanjana gave a wry smile and nodded. “He’s like our Night Vale Almanac, huh?”

Carlos laughed as he pulled into the Arby’s parking lot and started searching for a parking space. “Sounds about right.” Carlos found an empty space and pulled into it, turning off the car and taking a moment to check the time (1:45) and shake out his hands before he nodded to Nilanjana and climbed out of the car, notebook and pencil stub in one of his lab coat pockets.

“Chances are he’s not going to be here yet, but that just means we’ll get to choose where we sit.” Carlos said, pulling the door open and letting Nilanjana step in before him.

“Carlos, calm down. You’re overthinking this. It’s just a lunch meeting to discuss his management. Not a date.” Nilanjana laughed, leading Carlos into the restaurant and scanning the tables for Cecil’s distinctive style and then, when she couldn’t find the radio host, a free table.

“You’re right, you’re right.” Carlos said, following Nilanjana as she weaved through the tables, leading him to an empty one in a back corner by the toilets. “I just need to calm down.” Carlos told himself, sitting down slowly and starting to bounce his leg under the table. “It’s not a date.”

“That said though, you should definitely ask him what he wants and get his food when he arrives.” Nilanjana added, holding up a hand when Carlos turned to protest. “It’s only polite when you’ve asked him out to discuss his boss.” She pointed out, smiling when Carlos deflated slightly and nodded in agreement. “And besides, he’s here.”

Carlos jumped and looked to the front door, eyes searching for Cecil’s face and form and sighing with a soft smile when he found the radio host and waved him over.

“Carlos!” Cecil exclaimed, weaving through tables with slightly more hip movement than necessary. “I am glad you’re here, I am famished and I am ashamed to admit that if you weren’t here I would have ordered without waiting for you.” Cecil continued, cheeks flushing lightly as he slid into his seat.

“That’s okay, we would have understood. Speaking of, though” Carlos said, smiling at Cecil and patting his hand gently, “what do you want to eat? I’ll go order for us all.”

Cecil gasped, pressing a hand to his mouth and everything. “Carlos,” Cecil dragged the name out, making it sound longing and musical. “I couldn’t ask you to do that! I’m perfectly capable of ordering on my own!”

“I insist, Cecil. I was the one who asked you to meet here, the least I can do is pay for your lunch.” Carlos pressed, already sliding out of his seat as if that would solidify his insistence.

“Well... “ Cecil sighed and chewed on his lip. “If you insist, could I just have a roast buffalo sandwich with extra ranch? And a limeberry milkshake with mild venom?”

“Can do.” Carlos nodded, slightly surprised by the… interesting order, but still grinning when Cecil beamed at him.

“Thank you Darling Carlos.” Cecil cooed, resting his chin on his hand.

“And you Nils?” Carlos asked, turning to his co-worker.

“Whatever has chicken and looks good.” Nils answered, making a small shooing motion with her hand and sending Carlos to order.

“I’ll be back soon.” Carlos said, weaving back towards the main counter and working out what he wanted.

Carlos settled for ordering one of the nation-wide standard options available for Nilanjana while he got himself one of the more tame options from the sandwiches you could likely only get at this Arby’s. He ordered quickly, turning down the servers offers of sides, and waited around for their food, trying not to look over at the table holding Cecil and Nilanjana too frequently.

The food arrived soon enough, the tray passed over with a friendly smile and a reminder to ‘chant if you would like to take advantage of our free refills!’ as Carlos picked it up with a thankful smile and carried it over to his table.

“Here we go.” Carlos said, setting the tray down carefully so none of the drinks spilled.

“Thanks boss!” Nilanjana said, grabbing for her sandwich and digging in.

“Thank you, Carlos, thank you.” Cecil grinned, grabbing and squeezing Carlos’ hand gently as he slid back into his seat.

“It’s nothing, Cecil. Eat up.” Carlos said, blushing lightly as he started unwrapping his own sandwich and bit into it.

They all dug into their lunches, the impending conversation tucked away in the back of their minds while they enjoyed the food in various states of quiet. Cecil was wolfing his sandwich down, barely pausing to chew on the way, and was the first to finish, sitting and sipping at his milkshake while Carlos and Nilanjana continued eating.

Nilanjana was the second to finish, wiping around her mouth with a napkin and starting the discussion with some lead-in questions while Carlos finished eating.

“How long have you been working at the radio station?” She asked, passing Carlos a napkin as he finished, holding his hand low so the solitary drip of sauce didn’t run up his sleeve.

“Oh, gosh.” Cecil said, smiling a little and running a hand through his hair. “Well, it’s the only job I’ve ever had, and I must have been an intern first… maybe 20 years? Possibly more, I’m really not sure.” Cecil gave an awkward laugh and scratched the back of his neck.

“That’s a long time to have worked there. Do you enjoy it?” Carlos asked, scrubbing down the side of his hand to get the stubborn drip of sauce off so he didn’t smear it on his notes.

“Well there are parts of it I enjoy, certainly! The reporting, getting to speak to everyone at once, getting to teach all the interns the tricks of the trade, and when the Boy Scouts come in to earn their Subversive Radio Host badges they’re always so eager to see me in action, unlike many of the interns who moan and groan, but I don’t hold it against them, they’re just teenagers.” Cecil let out a chuckle. “Teenagers, right?”

“What are the parts you don’t enjoy so much?” Nilanjana asked, as Carlos finally managed to get rid of the sauce and start taking down all the notes he’d missed taking so far.

“Trying to placate Station Management, hiring new interns, making coffee when the interns fail to heed my warnings about the coffee machine, but you know. No job is perfect. It becomes perfect when you learn to accept it for what it is. And because of that I think my job is perfect. I have been doing it a long time, such a long time, but I wouldn’t trade it for the world. I  _ couldn’t _ trade it for the world!” Cecil shrugged and grinned while Carlos and Nilanjana exchanged concerned looks.

“What do you mean when you say you couldn’t?” Nilanjana asked, Carlos leaning forward eagerly and chewing on his pencil stub.

“I mean I literally can’t leave! It was prophesied that I would be the Voice of Night Vale indefinitely, I’m pretty sure there’s something about ‘unstuck in time’ in it too, but time’s not real anyway, you know? But basically, the job has been destined for me, and I for it, and now I’m in it I think it would take literally more than death to make it so I could quit.” 

Carlos hummed softly to himself, taking thorough notes on what Cecil had said about the prophecy, and chewed on his lip, so focussed on note-taking that he didn’t notice Cecil’s low choked gasp.

“Does Station Management have anything to do with the prophecy?” Nilanjana asked, smirking at the way Cecil was focussed on Carlos.

“What? No, of course not! How ridiculous would that be?” Cecil scoffed with a laugh. “No, they’re just a regular old boss, albeit a slight horror from another world of a boss.”

“What exactly do you know about Station Management, Cecil?” Carlos asked, tapping his pencil against his lower lip and watching Cecil with bright, curious eyes.

“Well, this isn’t their original plane of existence. They don’t appreciate being seen, or being talked about in their hearing, but really who does appreciate that? Not anyone  _ I _ know of.” Cecil paused to take a sip of his milkshake before continuing. “They have a great many tentacles, and sometimes we can see them through their office window, but only when they’re  _ really _ worked up about something. It takes a lot of practise to learn how to interpret their screeches, and as such what the appropriate response is. We’ve lots a lot of good interns because they haven’t been able to interpret the screeches right.” Cecil gave a long sigh and a slow headshake. “So many interns. Hmm, lets see, the only thing that can truly placate Station Management is a fresh sacrifice, like an intern or a particularly bloody slab of meat, but there are some certain Unmodified Sumerian chants that will subdue them enough to get away, and usually they’ll calm themselves overnight so it’s safe come morning.” Cecil paused, wringing his hands slightly and humming in thought while Carlos was frantically writing down everything he said. “I think that’s about it.” Cecil said finally, after Carlos had caught up with his notes.

“Thank you Cecil, that’s a lot of good information.” Carlos said, looking over the page and a half of notes he’d taken.

“Oh, I’m glad I could be of some use! I was worried that you’d try to study Station Management anyway, but I am not anymore.” Cecil said, grinning at both Carlos and Nilanjana.

“Don’t worry, Cecil, I promise neither me nor my team will directly try to study Station Management.” Carlos said, smiling as Cecil’s shoulders slumped, relieved, after his statement.

“Oh, good. Thank you dearest Carlos.” 

“However, would it be possible for someone to come by the station sometime? Just to get some baseline measurements in temperature, air quality, etcetera? If you can tell us where Station Management’s office is we can be sure to steer clear of it.” Carlos asked, fluttering his lashes slightly and giving Cecil his most charming grin which made the other man blush and fumble for words.

“I, well, yes sure you can take some measurements, definitely Carlos.” Cecil stammered, taking a moment to breathe and compose himself before reaching out and placing a slightly-clammy hand over Carlos’ own. “You could come take them now, if you wanted to, and if you have your equipment. I still have time before my broadcast starts to show you around.” Cecil said, calmer and more put together. “Oh! And you could meet Khoshekh!”

“We have time.” Nilanjana said with a shrug while Carlos nodded.

“Sure, we’ll come and test and measure. And meet Khoshekh.” Carlos said, nodding firmly to himself and trying to hold in a smile as Cecil did a little dance in his seat.

“Okay, let’s go! While Station Management still has interns to distract them!” Cecil said, standing and gathering everyone’s trash onto the tray before grabbing the last of his milkshake and Carlos’ hand and tugging the scientist towards the door.

oOo

The drive to the radio station is all but silent, with Carlos concentrating on following Cecil’s shortcuts and sometimes seemingly-random turns and Nilanjana reading over Carlos’ notes and adding in detail where he missed it. Finally they pulled into the guest parking space at the station, the scientists climbing out of the car and Carlos getting the equipment bag from the back while Cecil looked on, all but bouncing in excitement. 

“Gosh I just cannot wait to introduce you to Khoshekh, I’m sure you’ll love him and he’ll love you.” Cecil was babbling as he led them through the station’s side door and past the check-in desk where an intern was protesting that they’d have to sign in. “Leland, please, they’re the Scientists, they don’t  _ need _ to sign in, I’ll be with them the whole time.” Cecil called as the intern followed them down the hall with a sign in sheet and a pair of needles.

“Should we sign in? I didn’t have to sign in last time.” Carlos said, jogging lightly to keep up with Cecil’s long-legged eager strides.

“Usually you do, but Intern Jerry, gods rest his soul, was terrified of blood so Station Management made a temporary ban on bloodletting during his time with us. And today I’m making an exception because really as if any of us will forget that you were here.” Cecil said, waving Leland off again and leading the scientists up the stairs and to the left. “Oh, and we’re heree!” Cecil sing-songed, pushing the door to the men’s bathroom open and cooing over something inside.

Carlos looked to Nilanjana who was looking hesitantly at the sign on the door. 

“You don’t have to come in if you don’t want to. I won’t make you, and I’m sure Cecil won’t either.” Carlos said, taking Nilanjana’s hand and squeezing it gently.

“I’ll be okay. Wouldn’t want to miss out on anything.” She replied, squaring her shoulders and pushing the door open, pulling Carlos in by the hand he was still holding.

“Oh.” Carlos said, freezing in the doorway and watching Cecil fawn over a cat. A floating cat, about four feet off the floor, legs dangling just slightly and swaying with the air displacement from Cecil’s movements around it.

“Who’s a good boy, who’s my darling little Khoshekh?” Cecil cooed, scratching under the cat’s chin while it purred away like a chainsaw.

“A floating cat.” Nilanjana said, dropping Carlos’ hand and taking a tentative step closer.

Carlos stayed in the doorway, holding the door open and just watching as Nilanjana circled the cat, running a hand through the air above it and below it and then very tentatively scratching at the base of its tail, making its purr kick up a notch to ‘sounding like a small motorbike’.

“Come in Carlos, come pet him!” Cecil called, beckoning Carlos over with the hand that wasn’t rubbing one of Khoshekh’s ears. “Just be careful of his spines, they’re not poisonous, we don’t think, but I wouldn’t risk it anyway.” 

Carlos nodded mutely and took a step inwards, letting the door swing shut behind him as he reached out and dragged a finger down the side of Khoshekh’s ear. As he got closer, Carlos realised that what he had taken for black fur was actually a deep purple, marbled with lighter and darker shades that shone in the fluorescent light as Khoshekh mewled and rolled over in place.

“Aww look at you, what a good kitty.” Cecil cooed, grabbing gently at one of Khoshekh’s paws and rubbing the pads on his toes.

“This is fascinating.” Carlos said softly, running hesitant fingers through the fur on Khoshekh’s stomach while the cat idly waved his paws through the air.

“He’s just floating on his own.” Nilanjana added, running her hand down the length of Khoshekh’s tail.

“Did you hear that Khoshekh? You’re  _ fascinating _ !” Cecil grinned, straightening and leaning against the sink, ignoring Khoshekh’s reaching paws and protesting mews. “Did you want to do your testing now?”

“Can we test  _ him _ ?” Nilanjana said, looking up with awe filled eyes. “Just take some blood, maybe a fur sample?”

“I don’t see why not. As long as you’re careful and don’t hurt my baby boy.” Cecil said, holding a hand out for Khoshekh to rub his head against.

“We don’t have any blood sample tubes right now, we can get the fur sample, though, we’ll just have to come back later for the rest.” Carlos said, scratching at an itch on his arm idly. “Grab what you need Nils, Cecil show me where Management’s office is so I know where to avoid for the rest of our measurements?” Carlos asked, feeling his nose itch with an oncoming sneeze. 

“Of course I can Carlos.” Cecil said, sweeping out of the bathroom and holding the door open for Carlos as he sneezed loudly into his hand.

“Sorry, thank you.” Carlos muttered, exiting the bathroom and pulling a tissue he’d used to clean his glasses out of his pocket.

“Are you okay Carlos? You look slightly… flushed.” Cecil asked gently, placing a hand on Carlos’ forearm as he blew his nose.

“I’m fine Cecil, or I will be in a moment.” Carlos said, waving Cecil’s concern away. “It was just a little warm with the three of us crowded in there.” Carlos explained, following Cecil down the main hallway of the radio station.

“If you’re sure, dear Carlos.” Cecil said, taking a left turn and stopping, gesturing to the door at the end of the hallway. “If you steer clear of this hallway you should be fine. I presume you know where my studio is if you end up needing anything?”

“Yeah, I do. Thank you Cecil.” Carlos said, grinning at Cecil and dragging the equipment bag around his body to pull out their air quality meter.

“Take care Carlos.” Cecil said, leaving the scientist with a brief caress of his slightly heated cheek.

Carlos walked back down the main hallway, talking O3 measurements every 6 feet or so, and reached the turnoff towards Khoshekh’s bathroom just as Nilanjana was emerging from it herself, latex gloves on her hand and a ziplock bag filled with dark purple fur.

“Come here, lemme put this away and I’ll get on taking notes.” Nilanjana said, making Carlos turn around and tucking the sample bag away with their equipment.

With Nilanjana taking the notes, the testing went much faster, taking only another twenty minutes, according to their count, before they had tested all the places they could think of to build a proper median measurement.

Before they left Carlos made sure to go by Cecil’s studio, where he looked to be getting ready to broadcast, and let the radio host know they were leaving, via a tap on the glass and a series of hand gestures that culminated with a wave and a smile from Carlos and a blown kiss from Cecil that had Carlos giggling the whole way out to the car.

Nilanjana turned the radio on for the drive back to the lab, through the street-lamp lit roads and past the corners to nowhere that filled Night Vale when it was late enough. The radio was playing the end of one of the highest-rated shows in NIght Vale, Morse Code for Trumpet Quintets, and as they turned onto the lab’s street Cecil’s show started, just on time at 8pm.

“Time moves quickly when you are surrounded by those you love. It moves slowly when you are surrounded by those you despise, and it doesn’t move at all when you are surrounded by the dead. Welcome to Night Vale.” Cecil intoned, voice flowing rich as ever and warming Carlos to his toes.

“So, floating cat.” Nilanjana said, over Cecil’s reports of the day passing at double speed because of a City Council clerical error.

“Yup.” Carlos answered, rolling slowly past Big Rico’s and into the lab parking space.

“There’s no way the others are gonna believe it, right?” Nilanjana asked as they pulled out the equipment and made their way inside.

“Nope. Not at all.” Carlos shook his head as he opened the lab door, to the others sitting around a lab bench with the radio playing loudly and a couple of Big Rico’s pizza boxes open in the middle.

“You guys are not going to believe what we saw today.” Stan called, mouth half-full of pizza.

“Ditto, bro. D-i-double t-o.” Nilanjana said, walking over and dropping heavily into the seat beside Stan.

The team ate pizza and shared stories of lead doors and surface plutonium veins, floating cats and Angelically-endorsed Craigslist, all with the soothing background noise of Cecil reading the day’s news.

“Language is like an eternal beast,” Cecil’s voice was heard in a lull in conversation, “forever growing and evolving to meet our needs. Remember the ancient words of our ancestor’s language, the primal hoots and screams of their ancestors before them, and think about just how far we have all come to be able to understand each other, for you to be able to understand the not-so primal hoots and screams I am making right now with my mouth.” Carlos stood from his chair and started cleaning up the now-empty pizza boxes, bidding goodnight to the rest of the team and yawning as he trudged upstairs, Cecil’s voice following him through the lab. “And to think, in just a few short years these recordings may very well be held up as an example of an ancient language where someone else will be talking over my own tones and analysing my primal hoots and screams. This has been the Children’s Fun Fact Science Corner.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Pig Latin that the Erikas speak translates to 'Nix on the city talk. We can't just go around talking about the prophecy Erika!'
> 
> as always, comments and kudos are appreciated and you can find me on [tumblr](http://lonelyboyinthelab.tumblr.com) if you want to talk to me about floating cats or maybe the nature of the English language.  
> Uhm. I'm drawing a blank on what else to put here  
> so i guess  
> just  
> i hope you enjoyed the chapter???  
> -jazz hands-


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